"Excuse , what did you say?" I ask, still polite, but wondering if Lily had gone mad from suggesting such a possibility.
"Now, Seraph, don’t have this lady repeating herself uhm? What this lady told you is that this lady has found an alternative, soone on the main land capable of finding the High Lands."
"No, I heard you, but you forgot to consider the will of wanting to help part and this... this beast won’t do such a thing, he won’t do us any good."
"And how can you know that? How can you be so sure? It is worth the try."
I put my teacup down, ready to dismiss the possibility, after all she was talking about my father, the sa and only one who had abandoned us and left my mother to raise on her own, the sa and only that we never had any plans of eting in person and share any monts with.
But instead of speaking followed by emotion I instead fill my drink once more, the comforting sll and warmth keeping my hands busy and my mind grounded for this unpleasant conversation.
...What if she was right? If I could get him to point the way or sothing, at least, then perhaps I was much closer to saving mother than I thought at first, after Lily dismissed being able to help.
And what is my prejudice and hate against him with the possibility of freeing her...? From all the unpleasant things, situations, all the effort and pain from all these years, eting him was nothing in comparison, a minimum discomfort against all the nights spent awake imagining all the suffering my mother was at under the paws of that lion.
I take a sip of my drink, deeply sigh and give in. "Alright, if there is a chance we might get the location out of him we might as well try."
"What, that’s it? Tsk, this lady was expecting a commotion at least, how boring." She says after finishing her drink and, with so difficulty that she tries to hide, takes fly with her barred white wings and goes out of the room, saying: "This lady will talk with Lewis to change the curse of the ship, will take a little to get there so settle down you two, you look like you need the rest." She says, flustering her wings and looking down at my leg.
As she turns to leave, however, I call out to her.
"Lily." She does not turn to look but stops to listen at the door. "Thank you for all the help."
She takes a mont to answer, slightly turning her head only to show a smirk turning her lips into a grim. "You are not the only one who has a lot to settle against Heavenclaw. My sisters too were devastated that day, and this lady is not even sure if they are alive anymore."
I nod, completely aware of the situation, of how many lives Heavenclaw greed destroyed that day in one go, that fifthly lion.
And just how many more will be taken if we are not to stop him.
She finally leaves us and Ethan goes to close the door for the evening, locking it behind him as he sits back around the table, silence befalling us as none dare break the comfortable peace that takes the room.
But then I look down at my leg, the one injured by the fox to the point of having the flesh lt and the white bone poking out of the wound, and I stare at the reason that I was not freaking out by the lack of movent, the permanent damage, nor complaining about pain anymore, and feel a tight knot forming in the pit of my stomach.
"Don’t." I hear Ethan say, looking at him after staring for who knows how long down at my leg.
I blink, knowing exactly what he is referring to.
"I could still fly, you did not have to do that." He sneers, leaning back in his chair, trying to look at ease but I can tell he is uncomfortable with the subject.
"And what? Have you limp for life because of ?"
"Is not your fault..." I start, but he continues speaking over :
"It is, if I did better, if I was stronger you would not have to save ... if only, then you would not have been this badly hurt."
"Don’t do that to yourself, you know very well you are not guilty of anything here, and I was very much aware of the risks I was taking mind you. Plus... is kind of romantic, is a skin to skin link too now, isn’t it? Just like you said, connected even further, although I wished you had not had to hurt yourself for it." I say, trying to ease his pain by drawing a romantic outco to it as the knot around my chest seems to tighten, my eyes going down once more towards my leg, the once open wound now closed and rged with what once had been the tail of a very handso demon.
He shrugs. "I just figure, after seeing how the demon horn behaved at that woman’s chest, that if there was a possibility of closing your wound with a part of my body then it would be a small price to pay..."
I don’t have an answer for that so I give up talking about the subject at the mont, but I can still feel a guilty tight knot around my chest, after all the situation may have led to this, I may have led to the situation itself by wanting to rescue Lily, and even though my mind can understand the silliness of it all my heart still feels heavy with the situation.
But there is another part that grows on as well, and I rather choose what emotions to feed and give space to flourish and guilt will definitely not be one of them, so while we stay there, all alone, I think about the past events, of all that has led us to this day, to this quiet mont before the storm, and think how much things have changed, how much I have changed, being together with him, and for better or for worst we moved on, we evolved, and the from before would have felt sha, offended even, by having Ethan protect from the fox the way he did.
But the of now, the one dating him, the one sharing burdens and happiness, enjoyed having his companionship, his friendship, of knowing how reliable he is in difficult tis and how I can count on him when things get rough.
And I can’t oversee just how hot it had been to watch him act all strong and angry by the fact that I got hurt, and just how much he cared about to the point of being destabilized in that way... and the way that thinking about it now made feel a spark of joy in my cold heart.
And that, this ti, I let it burn bright.
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