Sena worried that speaking about her mories might trigger Julian to suffer a collapse like when she t him for the second ti, and he broke up with her. It could even crush him and leave him broken like when she first t him.
'Will he be able to forgive for hiding it?'
She didn't know from the start—her mories were foggy at first, but from the mont they kissed, images and mories rapidly started to return.
At first, she believed it to be a dream or sothing strange because of the ga.
However, the more she rembered, and things matched with what she saw in the ga and reality. Sena started to believe the dreams, and everything beca clearer when she spoke with Maria about her looking different.
"Julian... I rember."
"Rember what?" His eyes flickered and shifted from side to side.
'He's nervous...'
Sena didn't want to push too fast and reached out stroking his thigh before grasping his hand and rubbing his knuckles, rolling her fingers around them quietly.
'How do I say it... what do I open with?'
"I rember being with you in another life."
He glanced at her as if lost for a mont, and then his face beca pale for a mont. It was a different Julian, eyes filled with fear, and tears started to well up from the corners of his eyes. He didn't speak but nodded silently. But Sena realised she needed to push further, not pull back.
'He will never overco this emotion if I stop now!'
"I rember our first eting, our ti at university together... different from this life, you didn't dump and we never played the ga together."
"Really..."
Maria also squeezed his other hand that rested on her shoulder, she knew the details but the emotions weren't sothing to do with her and she got her closure with him... not it was Sena's chance, so they were all on the sa page and ready to step forward.
"Yeah, we dated for years and even graduated... I rember your apartnt... everything is blurry still but slowly returning. It looked a little different without that huge pod, and you didn't train like now."
Sena felt herself tremble slightly at her words because it was all true.
"I was a little useless and unworthy, right?"
Her lips curled into a bitter smile, though she loved him... Sena couldn't deny she fell for the man beside her even more and didn't want to have him compared to her past life or any other.
'I have to be honest and let him step out of his shadows... we still keep him bound even now.'
"Haha, to be honest I loved you... but you weren't the best boyfriend or man. I can't lie about that."
Julian laughed through his own pain, knowing the truth.
"I wasn't? Well, I'm not surprised. It's bitter to hear that, but that's right..." Although his voice sounded hoarse, his eyes shone with a vivid light as if reminiscing those mories.
Sena nodded; he was never that invested in their relationship in the way he was now. Although she felt his gentle nature and affection, there was also a sort of barrier between them, and she ntioned that to him. Julian nodded quietly and looked at the pair of them.
"It was difficult to forget what happened."
"What happened, you an with Maria?"
"Yeah... when Eleanora died and the devils started attacking Avalon, it was hard. So hard that most people took their lives to avoid suffering."
He swallowed hard, speaking softly but shaking.
"I t you in my class, and your were like the sunlight... when you spoke to and just dragged out of that miserable state. You reminded of her at first."
"Eleanora?"
Sena showed a complicated expression before looking at Maria who bit her lips, chewing them with a solemn expression.
'Digging into people's pasts... it's not glamorous like in dramas.'
"Yeah... at first. But you did so much for , taught who was worthless the skills to live and survive, though I also lost my parents without you I might have never got that far. Hehe, it sounds so pathetic. It was only after your death I realised I truly loved you."
The truth from Julian's lips was more honest and sincere than she thought.
He sotis held his breath and avoided speaking, but eventually, he would answer and show her a different side of him.
"It wasn't easy for you either..."
'I suffered in that life... but you always tried to keep smiling even as the world fell apart.'
"When things went bad, things seed to switch, for at least." Sena continued, at first she might have been the one pulling him up and helping him. But she felt the sa about Julian once she fell into hell; it was Julian's smile, his cooking and gentle comfort that saved her.
He never abandoned her, even with her scarred and ruined body.
"It must have been terrible."
"It was... really terrible..." She said.
"Do you rember when..."
"Ah... I do, you were covered in goblin blood."
The two began to speak about their shared previous life, but for Maria, who didn't have a place in this, it felt difficult to hear, her chest tightened because their ti together surpassed hers... by the ti she realised her feelings it was too late to do anything, the world was collapsing.
Yet, listening to them, it felt like they enjoyed a romantic life during the early months of the apocalypse...
'I'm jealous... jealous of a past life!?'
However, when she started to shake, a rough hand squeezed hers... and Julian pulled her close, his eyes watching her from the corners before flicking back to Sena, who was engrossed in her story that was coming to a tragic ending.
"That day, we thought it would be a normal hunt. Because the guild leaders didn't tell us anything and because of our contracts... we were basically slaves to their orders."
"I know... it was hard for you... because of , you signed that to keep safe."
"Yeah..." Sena smiled at him bitterly with her head lowered and tears falling down her cheeks.
Guilds would offer protection for the families in the early stages of the fusion.
Of course, it was a trap.
The contract was filled with clauses and reasons to punish the person, which led to Sena becoming restricted and forced to join raids weekly, rarely given a chance to return ho as the debt for protecting Julian piled up.
And that mission was another of the guild's foolish decisions.
"They sent us into an unscoured area... we didn't have a single spotter; they didn't care because there were so many recruits joining every day from the streets. It could be said that humanity was starting to recover at that point. Until 'he' appeared."
Sena started to tremble violently, her eyes flickering in fear before glancing up with tears flowing down her face like a stream.
"With a single swipe of his sword, five people just... exploded into blood and gore."
"It was my fault... I should never have asked you to sign that contract..."
Julian's voice sounded raspy as if trying to hold back the pain inside.
The contract was sothing he believed would help, but it turned out to be another shackle that made Sena miserable. Now, though, it felt good to admit and speak about these things, like a weight falling from his shoulders.
'Finally... we are speaking about it...'
"I tried to pull you away... run and hide, but I was useless, so fucking useless...
"The mont I faced that monster, I just knew that I wouldn't survive. It wasn't sothing the ga could help humans fight. The Devil was in another realm of existence, with the strength able to kill fifty people in seconds."
"Yeah, even ten years later it was a beast that killed an entire squad that trained to fight it."
Julian rembered and added his mories after she died.
"Julian... what happened to you after I died?"
Sena rembered the other shade and wondered if he rembered, but when he spoke, there was never a ntion of a female with that sort of build. But she noticed his mories seed distorted and a little wrong like sothing changed them.
"It hurts to know you slept with other won after I died..."
'We never even did it...'
This made Sena pout but then again... in this life, her first ti was amazing.
'Maybe I should thank them for teaching him? Ah... what a disgusting thought. Damn it!'
"Ah... I..."
Julian coughed, trying to avoid thinking about those won and the sexual activities.
Because it was more like eating, and doing it to avoid going crazy, he couldn't deny that he enjoyed himself but also felt guilt knowing that he was supposed to love Sena.
'It still makes feel strange when I think of it...'
"Then... you died to that bastard too?"
"I didn't stand a chance... his sword ripped us apart, and then he killed ."
With this, their past lives and hidden secrets beca clear... and out in the open.
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