The Queen Orc killed my friends.
Then the Queen Orc kept in the dungeon's resting room.
My emotions were overwhelming; I was sad, I was angry, and I was scared.
I often thought of just dying, but there was one thing that made feel like I could survive in that dungeon.
That was… my curiosity about the child raised by the Queen Orc.
I knew that re curiosity wouldn't be enough to make stop despairing. Most likely, I was able to survive because of that child's innocence.
The child was raised by Orcs, who didn't know anything, and he always tried his best to get close to and make his friend.
Eating together, telling stories together, chatting, and then his smile. Maybe he was the one who kept from giving up hope. But I didn't try to reciprocate in the slightest; instead, I intended to use his body to escape from there.
Even though I was almost raped by a goblin in the end…
I was grateful now…
That at that ti, I undid my intention to kill him.
I don't know if this is called regret or not, but my heart always thinks that I regret it.
When that child lost his mother, I could only watch him without doing anything. Even though he was crying for help, I could only stay silent. I couldn't save his dying mother, even though I had the power to do so.
How could I? I was too hesitant to do so back then. In front of everyone, in front of the prince, and she was the one who killed my friends?! There was no way I could heal that Orc.
But Allen's despairing face always showed up in my head.
He was just a 12-year-old boy who lost the mother who raised him.
There should have been another way to save that boy from despair.
One month passed, and I t him again at the Boldenville ho.
And as expected, he hated .
It was a natural thing, it was a common thing, and it was ordinary.
He looked at sarcastically, and that face reminded of him crying again and again. I'm sure he wanted to tell that he knew I ignored his plea that day, so that face of his tightened .
Allen, what were you doing when I didn't see you?
From your face, it seems like you've gone through a lot of things that I can't imagine.
Did you kill a human? Did you kill a human because of your hatred for ?
Does it an I am also responsible for every human life that you killed?
If only...
If only I had healed Queen Orc back then...
Maybe Allen would still be the innocent child I like. Always smiling and full of curiosity.
And now...
I suddenly saw him again after a few months.
In Barkaley territory, where it all started.
Allen is currently standing in front of , looking at with fear.
...
Rodion's tavern was closed at the ti because they had to help with Iva's birth, but soone ca in. That person was Lavinia, the first human that Allen t in this world.
He couldn't hide his intense dislike and fear of her. Allen was tornted by the fact that Lavinia knew more about him than anyone else alive. Her presence was like a sharp needle piercing Allen's tender scars. Allen was painfully reminded of the dark past, making him feel vulnerable.
"DON'T TOUCH MONSTER!!!"
"AT THAT NIGHT, I REGRET I DIDN'T KILL YOU!"
Those were Lavinia's words that he couldn't forget. He did not think about that during his eting with Lavinia at the Boldenville residence because his hatred made him indifferent to everything except his grudge.
But once his grudge was gone, and he started trying to change, he rembered that all his actions towards Lavinia were really pathetic.
And now she's afraid that Lavinia still hates him, like before.
"Allen? Are you really Allen?" asked Lavinia.
"Mi-miss Lavinia?" responded Allen a little nervously.
"Oh my! It's true! But your hair-"
"Allen, do you know her?" cut Rodion off imdiately.
"I-yes," Allen replied.
"Really?! But didn't Allen just co to this world last month?!" said Susan in surprise.
'Oh I rember... In Boldenville, he used the other-worlder gimmick to live. But what happened to his white hair?' Lavinia thought.
"I-I'll put these groceries back," Allen replied, walking straight back, passing Lavinia and Susan.
Lavinia then held Allen's hand and said, "Wait!"
As a result, Allen let go of the bag he was holding, and the groceries scattered on the floor.
"What?" asked Allen.
"Umm..." Feeling awkward because she had just reflexively held Allen's hand, Lavinia couldn't answer him.
'He's avoiding ...' Lavinia thought.
Lavinia released her grip slowly, "Do you mind if we talk a bit later?" she said.
Allen didn't look at Lavinia's face; he imdiately picked up the food scattered on the floor.
"Sorry I don't have ti right now; just go."
"How about tomorrow?! Do you have ti tomorrow?!-"
Intending to dig deeper, Rodion said, "Allen, we're not that busy. Go back and make so soup for this lady," he said.
"B-but master!"
"Just do it quickly!"
Lavinia's current existence is quite dangerous for Rodion. If she knew Allen, then Lavinia knew about Allen's white hair. Suppose Lavinia tries to find out about it. In that case, Rodion's ability to change Allen's hair color might be discovered by Lavinia.
Putting Allen's feelings aside, Rodion should know what kind of woman Lavinia is. Since Allen was uncomfortable with her, it could be that she wasn't a good woman, and that was really dangerous.
"Little girl, we'll make so soup for you; for now, sit down first," Rodion said.
"A-alright."
Because of his bad feelings, Allen quickly went to the back and cooked as Rodion instructed. While Rodion sat on the chair in front of Lavinia and asked her a few questions.
Once he finished talking to Lavinia, Rodion returned. At that mont, Susan approached him and asked
"So, who is that beautiful woman, master?"
"No idea; probably Allen's ex-girlfriend."
"EX?! W-w-w-a woman, that beauty is Allen's ex-girlfriend?!"
"I don't know the details either. What is certain is that she was the first person Allen t once he arrived in this world."
"Ooh... so Allen likes mature won like her... hmmm..."
Rodion had reached a conclusion that held significant value with regard to Lavinia – she was, without a doubt, soone who would never hurt Allen nor reveal his matters to anyone else. He noticed that she demonstrated remarkable compassion and understanding towards Allen's predicants whenever he conversed with Lavinia, making her the ideal confidant for him to overco his past troubles.
Plus, Lavinia was also a priest. She must have so healing techniques. Rodion thought of taking advantage of that. If Allen could persuade her, she might be able to help Iva.
An hour passed...
Allen finally ca out of the kitchen carrying a warm bowl of soup; he gave the soup to Susan.
"You should give it yourself," Rodion said.
"B-but, I can't-"
"Allen, if you want to part forever with your past problems, you must overco them. She's not a bad girl, and I'm sure you know that too."
Allen still hesitated; he didn't want to talk to Lavinia. At least for now.
"Allen, look at that girl's face.
She seems to have a lot of things she wants to tell you. And I'm sure she won't say anything bad.
Has that girl helped you in the past? If she has, then this is the ti to repay her.
Take responsibility for the trouble you've caused."
Responsibility...
Those word seed to bind him, but sohow were also word that would guard him in the future.
With strong determination, Allen stepped up, approaching Lavinia with the soup he brought. He, who now raised his head, could clearly see Lavinia before him.
Lavinia lowered her head with a very sad face.
'Miss Lavinia, she looks tired. Did sothing bad happen?' Allen thought.
When he saw her, Allen felt magically transported back in ti. The small tavern looked like his ho in the old dungeon, and he was walking on the green grass.
_Ah… I see... this is just like how it used to be...
I was walking towards the human that my mother brought while carrying a bowl of soup for her to eat.
That human... Miss Lavinia was also sad and bowed her head at that ti.
I must do sothing to make her happy again_
As soon as Allen arrived in front of Lavinia, Lavinia lifted her head, looking at Allen who was bringing her a bowl of soup.
'Allen, his expression seed troubled, as if he didn't know how to act,' Lavinia thought.
Allen opened his mouth,
"Qec, qofare cou..." Allen said.
"!!!"
Lavinia was shocked...
A few seconds later, Allen was too.
Because Allen felt like he was back in the past, he subconsciously said the sa thing to Lavinia when he first t her.
"Master, what language is that?" asked Susan behind Rodion.
Realizing that they shouldn't be listening to the two of them. Rodion pulled Susan's clothes into the kitchen.
"Never mind, let's just leave them alone," Rodion said.
Allen quickly placed his soup in front of Lavinia, and then he said
"No, forget it-"
"Tqanlsou," Lavinia replied, smiling.
Lavinia's smile sohow made Allen's nervousness disappear.
Allen then shifted his chair and sat in front of her.
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