[BENNET MANSION]
Charles dragged himself inside the ho, slumping onto the living room couch in exasperation. He had been driving around all day, seeing almost everything — more shenanigans from everyone than he could handle in a day — except for the person he was looking for.
"Master." Butler Jen, who had seen Charles coming earlier, approached with a tray of tea. He carefully placed it down before straightening his back, his eyes on Charles. "You seem exhausted. Are you alright, Sir?"
Charles exasperatedly glanced up at Butler Jen and shrugged. "That... I don’t think I’ll be alright for long."
"Did you have a fight with Sir Haines?"
"A fight?" Charles almost laughed. "How I wish it was just the usual."
But deep down, he knew it wasn’t like that.
This issue was sothing bigger. Charles just didn’t know how big, but he knew it would be bigger than he could ever embrace.
Thinking about it, his eyes cast down, swirling with sadness. Another heavy breath escaped him, and he didn’t even have the energy to stand or reach out for the tea Butler Jen served him.
Butler Jen, on the other hand, tilted his head a little to the side and studied Charles. After a mont, he walked over to the other end of the couch and sat down beside him.
"What is it, Charles?" he asked, dropping the usual honorific. "What did you do?"
Slowly, Charles looked up at Butler Jen. This man had been with the Bennet Family since Charles was a young teen, working for the Chairman’s family and then moving in with Charles when he got married. Thus, Butler Jen didn’t always feel like a butler to him, but rather a big brother — or perhaps, an uncle.
And whenever Butler Jen dropped the title, it beca a lot more personal.
"Horrible," Charles remarked. "I think I did sothing very horrible that hurt Haines — hurt him a lot."
His mouth quivered as his chest felt heavier. "And he might not forgive this ti around."
Butler Jen studied the fear peeking behind Charles’s eyes, nodding in understanding. Charles was probably the bravest man he had ever known; he had always been there through all of Charles’s phases in life. Hence, he could tell that the fear in Charles’s eyes was real.
"You rember that ti, Butler Jen?" Charles leaned back and sighed heavily. "That ti my father had to send to an asylum while telling everyone I was on a vacation?"
Butler Jen didn’t answer, but yes, he could never forget that.
"My father thought it was only because of what I saw in the battlefield, but in truth..." He trailed off, shifting his eyes back to Butler Jen.
Butler Jen offered him a very short smile. "It’s because of that."
Another mont of silence fell between them.
Charles had claid to never have said this to anyone, not even to his wife. However, that wasn’t exactly true. Although he didn’t tell Butler Jen directly, the latter was there when Charles was suffering about the torture and abduction he had gone through. Thus, he knew how Charles stayed in a short coma when he was finally returned to the base, and how his state of mind earned him an honorable discharge.
"Butler Jen," Charles called, staring at the old man as he forced out his next words. "Do you... perhaps know that Haines had a woman before?"
Butler Jen didn’t answer imdiately. However, his lack of response was enough.
How could Charles not know that in this house — or rather, in this family — Butler Jen almost knew everything? As soone who had always stayed on the sidelines, observing, he knew all the family mbers better than they knew themselves.
"So, there was a woman?" Charles scoffed weakly. "And here I claim to know him better than he knows himself, but I only learn this today."
"Sir Haines didn’t want to talk about her," Butler Jen said. "I only found out about her because Sir Haines, back then, was slowly straying off course."
Butler Jen hadn’t intentionally discovered it, but back then, he had paid Haines a visit. What he found was a drunk Haines, soone who seed ready to throw his life away. Butler Jen had to take care of him and witnessed Haines cry his heart out, even in his sleep.
Charles shook his head, eyes still on the butler. "Butler Jen, do you think... Haines really loved her?"
"..." Butler Jen didn’t answer imdiately, not because he didn’t have an opinion, but because he was unsure of how his answer would be received. "Sir Charles, may I know why this is important?"
"Because I killed her."
His answer was sothing Butler Jen — nor anyone else — would ever expect.
"I killed her, Butler Jen," he repeated, his heart clenching even more. "The woman... the woman I had killed in that operation, the reason I was abducted and tortured for the whereabouts of her body... it was her."
He paused, his breath hitching. "So, I’m asking... did he love her?" His voice cracked, hoping the answer was a big "no."
Even when he knew, deep down, the answer was the opposite, he still hoped he was wrong.
Butler Jen’s confidence in fixing the misunderstanding waned upon hearing that. Just like him, there was only one thing that crossed his mind.
What kind of a screwed-up coincidence was this?
Of all the people, why did it have to be that woman?
"Tell , Butler Jen," Charles breathed out. "Please. Tell I can fix it."
"..." Butler Jen lowered his head. "Sir Haines didn’t marry because... I believed he was waiting for her to co back."
And those words were sharper than daggers slicing through Charles’s heart. He leaned forward, resting his arms on his knees, his heart bleeding.
"What... did I do, Butler Jen?"
How could he fix this?
How could he return all the decades Haines had lost because Charles had taken them away from him?
Butler Jen’s eyes swirled with concern as he stared at Charles. "I’m sorry, Sir Charles." He reached out and tapped his shoulder lightly. "I’m sorry."
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