After leaving the nerd squad stunned and terrified with his existence, Raja blinked straight back to Charlie Harper's Malibu paradise.
And the first thing he saw?
Uncle Charlie. With another girl. Again.
Raja just sighed, grabbed a snack from the fridge, and noped out of there.
His destination? Rose's house.
When he got there, Rose was glued to her telescope, eyes laser-focused on Charlie's house.
Raja:"Still spying on him?"
Rose (serious):"Yes. He's up to sothing. He's cheating on ... even though we're not dating. But I KNOW he's cheating."
Raja just shook his head, walked into the kitchen, and started cooking.
Twenty minutes later, he called Rose for dinner. She reluctantly sat down, grabbed a plate, and took exactly three bites before standing up again.
Rose:"I have work to do."
Raja turned on the TV.
Raja:"Let guess. Spying?"
Rose:"It's called surveillance, Raja."
Raja just rolled his eyes and watched a movie. A few minutes later, Rose peeked from behind the couch.
Rose:"You coming to bed, or should I find soone else?"
Raja grinned shalessly.
And like a true degenerate, he followed her.
The next morning, Raja was still tangled in Rose's sheets when his phone rang.
It was Jessica Pearson.
Jessica:"We've got a problem. So cartel punks are trying to get us involved in drug trafficking."
Raja sat up imdiately.
The next second, he snapped his fingers—
Dobby appeared.
Dobby:"I am ready, sir!"
Raja:"Dobby, get to the ladies. We have so cartel trash to clean up."
Dobby:"With pleasure, sir."
One blink later, Raja was in Jessica's office.
Jessica and Jan briefed Raja. The cartel wanted their trucks to help move drugs across borders. If they refused, the cartel promised violence.
Raja looked at Dobby.
Raja:"Dobby, do you have details?"
Dobby (proudly handing over a scroll):"All locations. All key mbers. Criminal records attached. It is... a very long list, sir."
Raja (grinning darkly):"Dobby, you've made and your late master so proud."
Dobby (bowing):"Thank you, sir. Now, shall we begin the massacre?"
Raja (cracking his knuckles):"With absolute pleasure."
Jessica and Jan exchanged a knowing look.
Jessica:"Bloodbath incoming."
Jan:"At least the problem will be solved."
*And just like that, Raja and Dobby vanished.
They struck at night.
No magic that could be traced back to the wizarding world.
Just pure, unfiltered destruction.
Scene 1: Warehouse Raid
The cartel mbers were laughing, drinking, and counting drug money when suddenly—
BOOM! The doors exploded open.
A shadow blurred through the room.
Gunshots fired. Nothing hit.
Within seconds gun shot heard, half the n were on the ground, broken, bleeding, and unconscious.
One guy charged at Raja with a machete—
Raja caught it mid-swing and broke it in half.
Cartel Guy:"Wha—how the f—"
Raja (grinning):"Shhh. Sleep."
One punch. Lights out.
Dobby, anwhile, was a whirlwind of destruction, using enchanted knives, shadow step dodges, and house-elf kung fu.
In one night, a major cartel operation and all dangerous criminals are disappeared from the face of the Earth.
The survivors? They fled the country.
Back at HQ, Raja calmly sipped a mojito as he recounted his eting with other won and night of murder and mayhem to Jessica and Jan.
They weren't mad about other won or the mayhem.
But they did try to assert dominance.
For the next week, they took turns trying to overpower him.
They failed.
Because Raja's Ultimate Body™ is undefeated.
Even they had to admit defeat.
Raja? Raja just smirked and enjoyed his vacation.
After his vacation, Raja visited the Brooklyn 99 crew.
He drank with them at a cop bar.
At drink four, Detective Amy Santiago pulled Raja to the back alley.
Amy:"Listen, I don't usually do this, but—"
Then she tried to have her way with him.
Raja, ever the gentleman, took her ho before she could do sothing she'd regret.
Except... she didn't regret anything.
Amy woke up, apologized, got cleaned up—
Then round two happened.
Then round three.
Then...
Amy:"It's a one-ti thing, okay?"
Raja:"Got it."
They did it again.
For two days straight.
Raja officially beca Amy Santiago's biggest weakness.
Three months later, Raja sat in his penthouse, sipping tea, feeling like a degenerate.
Raja:"Maya... what's happening to ? I feel like a harem protagonist on steroids."
Maya (deadpan):"That's because you are."
Raja:"WHAT?!"
Maya:"Your Ultimate Body™ enhances all aspects of you—including your deepest, darkest desires."
Raja:"Wait... does that an I'm turning into an incubus?!"
Maya:"If not for your extre self-control and adaptability, yes, you would've beco a breeding monster."
Raja dropped his tea cup.
As Raja processed this revelation, a letter arrived.
From Harry Potter.
"Hey Raja, want to co watch the Quidditch World Cup with us?"
Raja grinned.
Raja:"Welp, I guess it's ti to go back to the wizarding world."
Maya:"Try not to corrupt the entire magical society, please."
Raja:"No promises."
And just like that, Raja's next adventure was set in motion.
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