(Perspective Mari Nagare) (Maria no Danzai)
I can't describe what I feel, although the truth is that I'm not sure if this can be called an emotion.
One year, ten months, three days, fifteen hours and twenty minutes. That was the exact ti where I stopped feeling anything but pain, sadness and hate.
Since I lost my son, I have no other thought than revenge.
I don't want justice, I just want to cause suffering to the people who hard my child… I want them to suffer a lot… to suffer until they die…..
But that is not enough.
I need to make sure the world knows what kind of trash they were.
Everyone thinks that my beloved son was a coward who committed suicide because he was a loser. No one tried to understand my son's pain, no one cared about the truth and they only made fun of him even after his death...
My son…
I'm a horrible mother...
I should have realized my son's pain, but I was too stupid and now my son is dead...
Everything is my fault….
Therefore, I will kill myself after my revenge is complete. I do not deserve to live.
Ever since my son was murdered, I have spent every second of my life focused on punishing the guilty.
I don't have the resources or the ingenuity to carry out my revenge, so I used the only thing I have.
I'm already far from my best years, but I can still be considered an attractive woman, so I didn't hesitate to do anything to carry out my plan. Anyway, my ex-husband left when our son died.
My body doesn't matter and my feelings don't matter. Using my own body as a bargaining chip was easy since I have nothing else to lose.
I managed to seduce the principal of the school where my son used to study and where the students who murdered him were.
My idea was to approach them slowly. So of them are depraved young n who have hurt many innocent girls, so it would be easy to seduce them into trying to kidnap , so that I would have a chance to be with them in a place where no one could find us.
I made plans for each mber of the boy group that murdered my son, but then a variable appeared.
A few months ago, a new student joined.
This wasn't relevant to my plans, but I've heard several teachers talking about that boy.
They described him as a violent and depraved delinquent who violated the morals of the city, so they had to get him out of school as soon as possible. The most striking thing was that they described him as soone violent and too strong.
Among my plans, I've thought of seducing so guys with low self-esteem to be useful pawns, so I did so research on that boy.
A few weeks ago an earthquake occurred that cost several lives, but the boy had managed to protect several students.
At that point it seed that the boy had a noble heart, but the truth is that his actions and attitude showed that he is a selfish boy and he only helped because there were attractive won.
After doing more research on that boy, I was able to confirm that several rumors were true.
He is a womanizer who does anything to seduce the beautiful won he sees. There are even rumors that he has been seen with divorced mothers.
There is not much information about his intellect and everyone refers to him as a violent pervert.
I managed to talk to so girls who seed to have a relationship with him and they also confird those rumors, although according to them, the guy is very kind and affectionate with the won he loves.
Up to that point I began to think that he could be useful to in fulfilling my desire for revenge. I didn't care if he used my body as his toy, anyway, I plan to die when this is over.
I just want to see my son again...
Due to a coincidence, today I spoke for the first ti with the boy who has been criticized as the worst trash in school.
I have been monitoring the movents and gathering evidence of the actions of the group that murdered my son. By chance, they tried to intimidate an innocent girl who turned out to be that boy's younger sister.
It's not the first ti that group has hurt a defenseless girl and I have photographed them doing these horrible things many tis.
At first, I felt an unbearable sense of guilt when I just stared helplessly at the helpless girls, but intervening will only ruin my plans. All lives are expendable in order to punish the people who murdered my son, even my own life….
Although I normally remain a bystander, on this particular occasion I couldn't bear to just watch without acting.
The little girl's frightened look hurt . That little girl's eyes are so beautiful that it's painful to see her sad.
Although intervening could ruin part of my plans, I was about to get closer to protect the little girl, but at that mont the little girl's older brother appeared.
After that, things got complicated.
I underestimated the boy.
No, I didn't actually underestimate him, rather I was fooled by his acting, we were all fooled.
The boy is just a juvenile delinquent who gets into petty fights and steals food from stores, but he's not really dangerous. That is the idea that all the school personnel had about him.
The boy didn't show it directly, but I can feel it. He is dangerous, much more dangerous than I can imagine.
Rumors are circulating in the school that the boy works with the yakuza, but the evidence shows that he is a simple errand boy and not really related to illegal situations, he is just a minor gang mber.
Now I can say that that's just an act. He's really part of the yakuza and I have a feeling he's already murdered people.
Because of all this and after thinking for several hours, I chose to cooperate with him. So, I went to the address he gave .
This may be a trap, it is even possible that the boy wants to hurt , but none of that matters to . If I die tonight, at least I will be able to see my son...
The place was a luxurious private building.
This made confirm so of my guesses.
Everyone thinks that the boy is poor and lives on the street or in a cheap apartnt. There are even rumors that he eats things he finds in the trash.
It seems that everything was prepared by him to keep his true identity hidden.
Actually, none of this matters to . I just want to see if he can help fulfill my desire for revenge.
Approaching the entrance of the building, I saw a pretty girl with pink hair and an expressionless face.
She was holding a bag of rice crackers and ate non-stop while she had a blank look. She only showed a subtle reaction when I approached the entrance of the building.
"Are you the nurse my boss is waiting for?" – The girl asked blankly after swallowing the cookie she was eating.
I saw that the girl had a small identification plate on her chest. The plate said 'Roromiya Karuta' so it must be her na.
(Author's Note: Karuta Roromiya from Inu x Boku SS)
I bowed respectfully. – "Nice to et you Roromiya-san, I'm Nagare Mari"
Roromiya-san felt. – "My boss is waiting for you, follow "
Roromiya-san started to walk, so I followed her.
We entered the building and despite the fact that the exterior of the building looks luxurious, the interior is relatively simple. Instead of a luxurious residence, the place seed like a serious and professional company.
At the entrance of the place there was a living room. Roromiya-san indicated that I should sit there and wait.
"Do you want sothing to drink or eat?" – Roromiya-san asked without showing emotions. – "You are the guest of the boss, so you can order whatever you want"
"No need, thanks" - I shook my head.
Since my son died I have lost my sense of taste and just eat so as not to starve.
Roromiya-san nodded and stood in front of as she continued to eat rice crackers.
It's a little awkward that she's staring at with her expressionless gaze. Maybe she's watching that I don't cause trouble, but since she doesn't talk I also remained silent.
I saw the clock that was on the wall and saw that it was two minutes to midnight.
When the exact ti ca, I heard footsteps approaching.
"You're early" – The boy appeared while he was holding a large bag that seed quite heavy.
I stood up and bowed respectfully. – "Oosuki-san, thank you for the invitation"
"You don't need to be so respectful to " – The boy sighed ironically. – "In any case, since you agreed to co then it would be better if you call Luis, after all, our relationship will be closer"
I looked up and smiled. – "I understand, so thank you, Luis"
The deal is simple; He helps get revenge and I will be his property.
That's fine. Be it my body, my life and my freedom, I can give up everything as long as I can fulfill my revenge.
Anyway, I'm not in my pri anymore, I'm old and he'll probably forget when he gets bored with . At that ti I can die to see my son again.
"Ah, you're so dumb you're cute" – Luis smiled strangely. He seed to be making fun of as well as appreciating .
His attitude is like he knows exactly what I'm thinking, but that's fine. He can do whatever he wants with as long as he keeps his part of the deal.
"Then let's go, I have a surprise for you" – Luis smiled, but then he looked at Roromiya-san. – "I also brought you sothing"
Roromiya-san was like an emotionless doll, but now her gaze was filled with expectation and happiness like a little girl who is going to receive a gift.
Luis opened the bag and took out a small lunch box to give to Roromiya-san.
Roromiya-san grabbed the box with an excited look. She is very cute, she reminds of my son when he was a child…..
Luis started walking towards an elevator so I followed him.
The elevator had no buttons, but Luis spoke out loud. – "Let's go with our guests"
The elevator began to move. I don't know if anyone is watching us or if this is so kind of new technology, but it's convenient.
I didn't want to talk, the only thing on my mind was what Luis had just said. He said 'our guests' that's how a group of people should be.
Maybe he really kidnapped them…..
I put my hand on my chest.
After my son was killed my heart has been beating slowly as if all things couldn't move , but now my heart is beating fast.
"Oh, your expectant look is cute" – Luis spoke with interest while he looked at my eyes. – "You do not need to hide what you feel, here you can be completely honest without anyone judging you"
"…" - I did not know to say. I can't get used to how easily he can understand my thoughts and emotions.
Luis didn't say another word, but he opened the heavy bag and took out a small container of strawberry gelatin. – "Here, eat a little"
"Thank you" - I smiled and accepted the gelatin.
I'm not hungry, I don't have an appetite, and I don't want to eat, but it would be rude to refuse a gift, plus I don't want to be rude to the man who can help fulfill my wish.
Luis also gave a small spoon, so I started to eat without expectation, but when the felatin touched my tongue, I felt a nostalgic feeling running through my heart…
A mory ca to my mind that I had almost forgotten...
It was when my son graduated from elentary school…
At that ti, my ex-husband and I were so happy that we took my son to the amusent park…
The most morable part of that mory was when we went to eat as a happy family… The dessert was strawberry gelatin…
…
My legs were shaking and I had to lean against the wall to keep from falling to the ground.
I had to take several deep breaths to calm down.
My hands were shaking, but I managed to hold the dessert so it wouldn't fall to the floor.
My vision was blurry from the moisture in my eyes.
When my son died, I cried every night for over a year, but in the last four months I have not been able to cry anymore, even though my tears have dried up.
It was unexpected to cry again, but a hand reached out in front of to give a handkerchief.
I accept the handkerchief and wipe my tears as I ask with angry even though I'm not really angry. - "How did you know? How did you know about my family?"
"I don't know what you're talking about" – Luis shrugged.
… He lies… he knew it… he knows how important this mory is to …
I regained my composure and returned to my upright posture, but I didn't want to drop the little dessert. – "I don't know how you found out and I don't know why you are so interested in knowing about my life, but thank you… I really appreciate it"
Luis just smiled and kept quiet as the elevator kept moving.
I moved the spoon again to eat another bite of the gelatin... - "It's delicious..."
It is very delicious…
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