And just when I thought I'd heard it all…
Should I have seen this coming? Was this ever to be a likely notion I was going to eventually entertain sooner or later? Have I just simply been blind to all the signs?
Or had Alia just completely lost her mind?
"You're stunned," she said, a simple enough observation to declare that her sanity was definitely, unbelievably, still intact. "A response of which I cannot possibly fault you for. It is entirely warranted. And yet regardless I must ask… do make haste coming to terms with it all. This indignity… the sha… truly, I'd rather not do sothing I may regret."
It was like soone was slowly clamping down on her throat as she spoke. There's swallowing your pride, and then there's just outright choking to death on it—like, I don't think I've ever seen a person in this much utter agony from simply asking for help.
Then again, I still haven't a clue what kind of help it was she needed. Who knows? Maybe she had a good reason for making witness her ego's slow, painful demise.
"Well?" I said again. "I'm still listening."
Alia relaxed the invisible noose around her neck, just loose enough to be able to explain her case to .
"You saw him, yes? Tyler? Out there?" She began to quiz , staying stiff and silent until I gave her an answer.
"Yeah, I saw him."
"And how does he look to you? Faring better?"
"Much better," I continued to answer, wondering where the hell this was even going. "Like the whole fiasco never even happened. If anything, he's much happier now. But, y'know, pretty sure you'd know more about all that than I would, so I'm not sure why you're even asking."
All of a sudden, the wall next to us beca the most riveting piece of textured plywood she'd ever seen in this world and one other. Whatever. Everyone copes in their own special ways, right?
"He's happy, he's as well as can be, and in every other circumstance, in any other affair, that would have been the extent of my regard toward him. I am rightfully under no more obligation to invest any more thought or ti in his state of being. What I do next, I intend to do of my own discretion; not under the duress of sha… or guilt of any aning. "
"Uh-huh," I nodded, following along still but more in the way of like a blind man struggling to walk across a very decrepit sidewalk. "That's… good for you, I guess?"
Alia heaved, her brows sloped in that sharp curve of agitation. "But it is not enough."
"What's not enough?"
"Tyler being well. Him being happy!" She unloaded harshly to the poor, innocent wall. "I do not understand why! Why?! Why isn't it suddenly not enough for ?"
I thought, and I thought fast… not yet fully grasping what the hell she was on about. But at least, still gotta pretend like I did, right?
"Tyler being good… is not enough for you?"
Alia shot up in a blur, and I felt the hard flex in my muscles as my arms attempted to shield from an attack that never ca. Instead she just rely left her seat to pace about, Leon's trailer turning into her own personal stomping ground.
"I have done everything right, everything to set is right. Yet, why does this feeling persist? This… inane, unfathomable sense of obligation. As if all I've done proves insufficient! It isn't! He's fine. He's content! I've agreed to continue indulging his whims and wants of . I've even agreed to partake in this stupid, vapid caricature of my realm's events. I swore to see this to its end. What more, then? What else must I do? Why won't this feeling go away?"
"What kind of feeling?" I asked.
"I do not know!" She roared out furiously. "Why is it do you think I ca to you?!"
Then she whirled at , terror in her eyes, big and brimming.
"Help. ."
"Alright! Just—relax, Alia," I said, reaching an arm out to her before quickly deciding better. "You wanna talk to , talk to . Calmly. Unless you rather the whole world hear your problems."
"A mockery, this has to be," she muttered fast and quietly in deranged whispers. "A transgression to my own standing. Of my own doing. That human… Tyler… indulging this… and to co to you of all people… I must be losing my mind. I have to be."
Hey, that's what I said.
"And yet despite that, still you ca to for assistance anyway," I said. "Guess the honor's mine. Thanks."
"You were not the first I sought out for this," she said firmly, as if it was an absolute necessity that I must know this vital piece of info. "I've approached my sister on this matter several days before."
Oh, well, guess now I know what they were doing when they were out spending New Year's together.
"Unfortunately, Adalia was of no help. When I explained the situation to her, she treated it with simple levity. As if it was so very simple—never could she be more wrong," the ends of Alia's brows sunk even lower. I've seen her angry before, I've seen her annoyed. But never offended. "She told I was simply in love."
Yep, that would do it, alright.
Honestly, I could see both sister's sides of the story. I an, co on, here she was, pacing back and forth, confused, irritated, venting about so boy that refused to leave her every waking mont.
How much more obvious can you get?
But on the other hand, this was Alia we were talking about. The Grinch could grow his heart a hundred tis over before hers could even start to swell. Could it really, seriously be that simple?
"Love…" she sneered, spitting the word through her teeth like poison on her tongue. "Can you honestly believe her? Accusing of such trite, fickle nonsense."
"Mmm, well… have you ever heard of Occam's razor before?"
She frowned at . "What?"
"If it looks like love, if it sounds like love, then clearly it's—"
"It's not love!" She snarled, her growl rattling with a literal razor's edge. "I am not blind, and I am certainly not a fool! Do you not think I would not have already considered the notion?! I know how it is to love another! I have felt love before!"
"Alia, your sister doesn't count."
"I'm talking about your mother, you idiot," she said, simring rage flaring through her nostrils. "And I do not share the sa sentints for Tyler."
"You loved my mother?"
"For a ti, certainly," she said. "In exchange for her aid, we were to be her daughters, rember? A request unachievable unless taken upon with absolute sincerity. And indeed, we were sincere."
There she goes, completely ignoring the fact that familial love does not equate to romantic love. I decided to hold my tongue. If she doesn't think it's love, then that's good enough for . No way I'm risking a claw to the face arguing over semantics with her.
"Fine," I said, shrugging. "So, tell , how long have you been feeling like this?"
"Since he had his little 'incident' I would say," Alia replied, calming down slightly. "Before, I presud it was guilt. After all, it was my negligence, my complacence, that allowed him to be hard. So, I quickly made to redy my unrest. I talked to him, offered my apologies, and extended him an arm of amity. Both of which he happily accepted. I thought that would have been enough. Obviously, it wasn't."
"Right…" I pause to think, finishing the rest of my drink. "Y'know it is possible that you could just still be feeling guilty about the whole ordeal."
"Remorse, again?" She scoffed. "Why? What is left for to regret? He has already forgiven for everything himself."
"Think perhaps it's you who hasn't forgiven yourself?" I said, standing up to look for a bin to throw my can in. "Think about it, Alia. Like what have you really done, putting it all in broader terms? You said sorry, you shook hands on friendship, what else…?"
"I am an Elidna," She answered, crossing her arms and looking all affronted. "Baring myself with foolish words and antics for everyone else's entertainnt. You say that is not enough?"
"Maybe not for you," I returned to my seat, all under her intense watchful eye. "Again, in broad terms, you're just doing him a favor. Maybe, just maybe, you're actually looking to be punished."
Her eyes went wide again.
"How dare you—"
"Hey, that's just my two cents, okay?!" I interjected, before any of my blood wound up as a fresh coat of paint on Leon's walls. "Here you are asking for my take, you got what you wanted. But wouldn't it be simpler for you to just go and confront the source yourself? Then we could see if I'm right."
Alia muttered and grumbled herself into silence, seemingly no retort at the ready.
I watch her begin to pace again, only this ti with an actual intended path, her steps leading her toward a set of curtains. She pulled away the blinds, sunlight imdiately drenching color down onto her pale face. Her eyes peered out onto the set, the window offering an encompassing view of the entire vicinity.
The next scene was already being prepped, caras set in precise direction, last-minute checks being checked off on every piece of equipnt. I could even see Leon sowhere in the bustle, engaged in conversation, with bits and pieces of Hayley's costu jutting out behind his giant, heroic stature.
And I imagine, if I were standing at Alia's angle, I could also very easily make out the corner where the food and refreshnts were currently being served with a special side of zest and passion.
"Supposing that you are right…" Alia said, turning toward with an ominous, dangerous glance. "Only supposing. Am I understood?"
"Supposing. Got it." I nodded.
She lightened her glance, her glare, shedding her rage to finally reveal the weary and confused woman hiding behind it all.
"What would you have do?"
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