Left and right with growing exponential excitent, she continued to stroke her foot against the hard bulge in my pants.
I felt like a deer in headlights, the way I just froze stiff there. Because it was her, knowing that it was her, feeling it, I… I just couldn't handle it.
Ash was always the paragon of elegance to , a bright beacon of light, of grace, that I'll always pale in comparison to. An unsullied beauty that knew no depravity.
Now, like a dream, a dream surely a million miles away from reality, here I was fondling her beautiful round breasts, pinching her hard nipples that were perking out between the slits in my fingers while I continued to throb and swell against the sole of her foot.
That's when I realized that behind that elegance, her grace, hid another side to her, a more deviant, a more lecherous side that was now slowly seeping out to the surface… and I wanted to see more, more and more, this side kept buried all this while, I want to know more.
Her soft moans, her fast silent gasps ringing out her pleasure was a sound that'll continue to make my heart skip a beat every ti I hear it, her body twitching, shuddering from just my touch, I'll never get used to it, used to this… and it was all for the better.
But with her newfound boldness, ca also newfound uncertainty, confusion… inexperience.
"Am I…? Does this bring you any semblance of pleasure, Master?" Ash swallowed, her lips refusing to completely seal close. "I'm afraid that I've… little experience or knowledge of things such as… such as this…"
"Mmm, yeah, it's okay, you're okay, you're doing good, you're making feel good…" with a wavering breath I tried to say, taking my hands off her for a mont to remove my shirt, clumsily awkwardly, bumping elbows and nearly ripping the seams.
Then suddenly, pressing onto my skin - across my bare chest, all the way around my back - a warmness, a softness, and Ash held in an embrace,
"Nevertheless, Master," She said, a tender smile nestling against my collarbone. "With my body, with myself, I wish to pleasure you to my greatest extent."
"Sa here," I said, embracing her back, feeling her body mold itself onto the shape of mine.
"Because I'm yours, I'll always be yours and nobody else's, never to any other, never."
"Yeah…"
"Always… always and forever… truly, sincerely…"
There was sothing to her embrace, to her words, I felt it again - that sothing unknown, sothing mysterious - stronger now as her hold grew stronger too.
"I love you, Master," her muffled voice clinging tight onto her embrace, and she wasn't letting go. "I really, truly do love you oh so much…"
I froze again, that feeling more prominent than ever, hearing more to her words than she probably ant to convey. "Ash…"
"I love you, I know I do…"
"Ash, what's wrong?"
"And yet," Her fingertips, I felt them dig, felt them hold tighter. "Why is it that those words sotis not ring true in my heart any more?"
And then I realized this was it - her quiet as she tended to my wounds, her distance, and silence as she stood by over all evening, what she's left unsaid - this was that sothing.
"He is to bla, his infuriating words, his dastardly statents, entirely the reasons why I feel the way I am now, " She whispered, and even without details, without elaboration, I knew instantly who. "I know, I know you say not to heed him, to disregard him, he only ans to instill unrest, I know, but Master, I… what if he ans right? I don't want it to, but to consider…"
She buried herself deeper underneath my neck, I could feel her reluctance everywhere, the way she breathed, the way she held , how she refused to look at … everywhere.
"If it hadn't been you that day, should it have been soone else to have found then, a different person, a different face, yet just as kind, just as benevolent… I wonder, would I have fallen in love with them just as much as I did you?"
The mont she finished speaking those words, I could imdiately sense the regret she felt ever having spoken them at all. She slumped her head onto even more, it was like she was trying to bow, trying to apologize, only she couldn't.
"My… My apologies, Master, I don't an to have tarnished this tender mont, this was the last thing I would have wanted for us now, but I just… it irks too much this foolish notion of mine, this stupid idea he implanted in my head… to wonder, if it was truly you that I fell in love with, or rely the idea of you. It unnerves , Master, it truly distresses to think it so."
Then ca the utter sha washing over her, the sudden stillness of any movent. This close, this near, I could hear everything, feel everything, and the way she was now… it was as if she had stopped breathing.
A slight shift, and her head slanted downwards even more. "Are you… upset with , Master? For even thinking this…" She swallowed. "I… I'm sorry… please don't be upset with , please..."
"I'm not Ash, don't, I'm not upset, you didn't upset ," I said, hugging her, desperate to reassure, as earnestly as I could. "It's okay, I understand… you don't have to feel guilty for thinking that way, there's nothing wrong with it."
"Everything is wrong with it, Master. The very prospect of it, I despise it… that question, that wonder… and fearing to know the answer, whatever that answer may be…"
"Then stop fearing it alone, Ash," I told her, pulling her away to et with her gaze, looking deep in the glistening shimr in her erald eyes, trembling terribly, "Tell , ask again… let answer it for you."
Her grip on quivered, as did the sound of her voice. "Are my feelings for you now… as sincere as I claim to be? or are they… after all… rely circumstantial? Would I have cared for anybody the sa way? If it weren't you? If you weren't there! Would I have… would I have just as easily… fallen in love with anybody else instead? And if… had it been him instead that had found that day, would I… would I have… as well…?"
She couldn't finish, she didn't want to finish. Her fingers on my back began to pinch, I think the thought alone must have terrified her, and I can't bla her for it one bit. Just giving it a single second of consideration… hell, it terrified as well.
But at the end of the day, that's all it was - just a thought, a notion, not reality, not the present - and that's all it'll ever be. Besides, there's just one thing she was forgetting here.
"But it wasn't him that found you that day, Ash, was it?" I said quietly, lifting her fallen gaze with a hand across her cheek. "It wasn't sobody else either. It was , Ash… you fell in love with ."
For a mont, she seems to search through my eyes, as if wanting to know what I could see that she wasn't seeing.
"I… I know that Master, but what if - "
"Yeah, what if, right?" I interjected, giving a slight, wryly, smile. "As if that's what actually happened. But it didn't happen, Ash, that's not what happened. So why worry about sothing that never even ca to be? I an, alright, sure, maybe if I hadn't been there that day, it'd be just like you said… maybe right now, right here… you'd be held in the arms of soone completely different, an entirely different Master that you'll love right back. "
At that, Ash's eyes grew wide, terrified, and she instantly lunged herself at again, nearly toppling over, holding even tighter than before, nearly suffocating, refusing to let go.
"I don't want that…" She muttered. "I don't want to think that…"
"But you're not holding him right now, see? And he's not the one holding you," I wrapped my arms around her again, gently squeezing her and burying my face in her long white locks. "I am, Ash. I'm the one that's holding you now and I'm the one that's in love with you now."
Ash said nothing, her arms continued to cling on tight, so I continued to speak on.
"There's no going around the fact that maybe, yes, you could have loved soone else instead. But that doesn't change the fact that you're in love with now. That day, that mont, yeah, anybody would have been the luckiest person on earth to have t you… and out of everyone that day, sohow, soway, I ended up being that lucky one… and each and every I wake up and see you, I can't thank life enough to have t you. So what just because you could have fallen for sobody else? Does that automatically an your love for now isn't real now? Tell , doesn't it feel real right now?"
I let the question linger, and as for the answer… she could sense it all around her I'm sure. The sound of heartbeats beating as one, the warmth of our bodies close together. Our mories, our experiences, everything we've gone through together…
"Feels pretty real to , Ash," I smiled again, lifting her gaze back up towards mine once more. "What say you?"
She answered with silence, slight movents… leaning over, kissing on the lips, soft and sensual, driven not by passion, not by lust, I felt only her emotions, the way her fingers slowly slid into mine, the gentle way we weaved and rocked against each other, and the sudden warmth splashing down on my knee, I felt that too.
We broke apart, and I saw the shimr in her eyes falling in streaks, tears glistening on her cheeks, and yet, she smiled at . It was a beautiful smile she had… the prettiest.
"Real…"
"And what does your heart say?"
"That I am just as lucky, just as fortunate, to have fallen in love with you, and not any other," She kissed again, speaking between breaths in a whisper. "I'm really, really, happy that it is you..."
I nodded my head, wiping the tears from her cheeks. "That's what I thought," shortly after, we fell back into each other's arms, into our embrace, into this mont...
Our quiet mont.
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