By the ti visiting hours ended, Nina looked way more relaxed than when I had first woken up. The worry lines around her eyes had mostly disappeared, and she wasn’t fidgeting with her hands anymore.
"I’ll co back tomorrow after school," she said, gathering up her stuff. "Unless you don’t want to. I don’t want to bother you if you need to rest."
"You’re not bothering ," I said. "It’s actually nice having soone to talk to."
She smiled at that. "Okay, good. I’ll see you tomorrow then."
After she left, the room felt way too quiet. I had gotten used to having her there, which was weird considering I usually preferred being alone.
’When’s the last ti I actually wanted soone to stick around?’ I thought.
I couldn’t rember. Usually when people tried to hang out with , I’d find excuses to leave or just wait for them to get bored and go away.
But Nina was different sohow. Talking to her didn’t feel like work.
I reached for my phone on the bedside table. The nurses had brought it from the crash scene along with my backpack. Surprisingly, it was completely fine. The case had done its job.
I opened up the school group chat first, scrolling through the ssages from the past two days. People were talking about howork, complaining about teachers, sharing s. The usual stuff.
Nothing about .
I checked my class group chat next. Sa thing. A few people asking about the chemistry test, soone sharing notes from history class, but no ntion of the fact that one of their classmates had been in a car accident.
’Not sure what I expected,’ I thought. ’These guys don’t care enough to discuss .’
It wasn’t like I was surprised or anything. I had never made much effort to connect with anyone in my class, so why would they care what happened to ? But seeing it laid out like that, seeing how little impact my absence had made, was still kind of depressing.
I was about to put my phone away when it started ringing. Mom’s contact photo filled the screen.
’Finally,’ I thought. ’I was wondering when they’d call.’
"Hey, Mom," I said, answering on the third ring.
"Kofi! Oh, thank god you’re okay," she said, and I could hear the relief in her voice. "I’m so sorry we couldn’t be there. The earliest flight we could get is Friday."
"It’s fine," I said. "I get it. Work is work."
My parents had been working overseas for the past year, so kind of consulting contract that paid really well. They sent money ho regularly and called every few weeks, but they weren’t around much. I had gotten used to it.
"How are you feeling?" she asked. "The hospital said you have so broken ribs and a concussion?"
"Yeah, but I’m fine. Just sore. The doctors said I should be able to go ho in a few days."
We talked for a while about the accident, about my injuries, about school. Normal parent stuff. I told her about the chemistry test and how Nina had talked to my teachers about my assignnts.
"That was nice of her," she said. "She sounds like a good friend."
"Yeah, she’s..." I paused, trying to figure out how to explain Nina without making it sound like a big deal. "She’s been really helpful."
"You sound different," she said suddenly.
"Different how?"
"Happier, I guess. Your voice sounds... lighter than usual."
I blinked. Did I sound happier? I didn’t feel particularly happy. I was stuck in a hospital bed with broken ribs and a concussion. What was there to be happy about?
But then I thought about Nina. About how she had been sitting here worried about , how she had made food, how she had laughed at my stupid jokes. About how easy it had been to talk to her.
’Oh man,’ I thought. ’If this continues, I might fall for her and that’s a big no.’
The realization hit like a punch to the gut. I was already starting to like Nina. Not just as a friend, but actually like her. Which was a terrible idea for about a million reasons.
First, she was way out of my league. Second, she was only being nice because she felt guilty about the accident. Third, I had zero experience with relationships and would probably ss it up completely.
And fourth, getting my heart broken once was enough.
"Kofi?" Mom said. "You still there?"
"Yeah, sorry. Just tired."
"Well, I’m glad you’re okay," she said. "And I’m glad you have soone looking out for you. This Nina girl sounds special."
’That’s the problem,’ I thought. ’She is special. And I’m not.’
"I should probably get so sleep," I said. "The painkillers are making drowsy."
"Of course. I love you, sweetheart. Dad sends his love too."
"Love you too, Mom."
After I hung up, I stared at the ceiling for a long ti. I couldn’t stop thinking about what she had said. That I sounded happier. That my voice was lighter than usual.
’Was I really that miserable before?’ I wondered.
I an, I knew I wasn’t exactly the most cheerful guy in the world, but I didn’t think I was walking around sounding depressed all the ti. I thought I was just... normal. Quiet, maybe. But not sad.
But the more I thought about it, the more I realized Mom was probably right. I had been pretty fucking miserable for a while now.
Not in so dramatic, crying-myself-to-sleep kind of way. More like this constant low-level emptiness that I had gotten so used to I didn’t even notice it anymore. Like background noise that you only realize was there when it stops.
I tried to rember the last ti I had genuinely looked forward to sothing. Not just killing ti until the weekend, but actually being excited about sothing that was going to happen.
’Can’t think of anything,’ I realized. ’That’s pretty sad.’
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