Let ask you a question.
How does soone fall in love?
We've all seen romanticised love at first sight all over the dia.
But that simply doesn't exist right?
If I got you to walk down a long road with people standing on either side, would you suddenly fall in love with any of them?
No, right?
You can consider them pretty, you can consider them attractive, but in the end, that's just an appearance. There's no secret connection between two people who've never t.
So how does soone fall in love?
Can two people suddenly develop a magic connection, succeeding space and ti, linking them together like a soft, fluffy chain?
No, right? Magic doesn't exist.
As cliche as it sounds, love is just a human thought process.
It's a feeling where two people feel inseparable, where they are willing to spend any and all the ti they have with each other.
But isn't that in itself fundantally flawed?
Any other relationship like that would be toxic. An alcoholic who can't function without alcohol, who feels connected to alcohol would be considered unhealthy. A shut-in who spends most of their day playing video gas, craving it like an illicit substance would be considered unhealthy.
All healthy relationships require space, you say?
With all these counteracting elents, what is love?
Can you really love sothing with all your heart without being crushed? Regardless, we are getting side-tracked.
If love isn't sothing that is developed supernaturally, then how is it developed?
Maybe love is developed by an unrepayable favour, like a princess saved by a knight in shining armour? But that in itself sounds wrong.
Love is not ant to be an infinite guilt but an unconditional acceptance.
**
The first to fall in love loses.
It wasn't like nobody ever liked . There were still people who confessed to , but they were never the people I liked. At first, I thought that this was just bad luck.
But this was obviously no coincidence, love in its most fundantal form is established by forming a genuine connection.
That's why it is so much easier to fall in love with your friend than it is with a stranger.
Love is already in the air when you already have a working relationship. You're rely building on top of an already stable foundation instead of starting from scratch.
So, can you manufacture love?
I'm not talking about making soone fall in love with you. What I wanted to find out was
can you manufacture love within yourself?
This itself is extended from the idea of love at first sight. You simply input the idea of love into your head when you see the person.
In love at first sight, the subtle glance from a cute person. Instead of letting your brain accept that as a re glance from a stranger you think
Maybe we have a connection?
This is when you subconsciously claw yourself into a rabbit hole which gets harder to get out the deeper you go.
You didn't have a connection with this person, you made yourself think you did.
This is why I spent the very last three years of my life fawning for a girl who barely even knew .
Actually, that would be a lie.
I didn't really like her either. Not in a cliché way.
I only pretended to like her.
I lied to the people around , I lied to her and I lied to myself.
That's why it felt different, there was no foundation or even a base. It was just the walls of a house placed on the dirt of the ground.
It was funny, why her? I thought she was sowhat cute, but that was it. Aside from one ti when she sat next to on the bus, I had practically no experience with her.
I had no problem with it, though. Despite everything, my artificial affection for her gave a little bit more motivation every morning.
In the anti, I had actually been through many more romantic experiences.
It wasn't until after that, that I realised, maybe I was the outlier. That I was the one different from everyone else, not the other way around.
*
It was a cold, crisp afternoon like any other. I was sitting on my couch, happily texting so friends. There was this girl who used to always start texts with , with a naive 'hi' or maybe sothing more extravagant like 'hey'.
I thought of it as nothing much.
She's just a talkative person, I guess.
Obviously, in hindsight, that was not the reason. Partially because I was consud in another world coveting another girl, one who had already consud all of my thoughts.
People really are blind when it cos to sothing regarding themselves.
I wouldn't break my rock-hard defence of innocence until a ssage, practically punching in the face and then kicking whilst I was on the ground, was sent to .
'The person I like is you.'
Oh yeah, I get it now.
It was years too late. It wasn't even that I didn't like her. I actually liked her very much since primary school, but that changed nothing.
There was soone else I 'liked'.
My mind was being eviscerated by a monster generated by my own selfish desires hidden under a façade of innocence and childishness. However uncomfortable it was to accept, my almost broken yearning for her was as healthy as one thing could be.
It was like a respectful distance between the crude concept which is romantic relationships.
I never got too close, I was not addicted. It was like a subtle boost of energy at periodic monts in the day when I would see her and think.
Cute.
Nothing less, nothing more.
Is this what love is?
Could this really be love in its purest form?
Sothing as unimportant and irrelevant as a subtle craving ford by a hole in one's heart, could sothing like this really be love?
Love at first sight.
What a fluid yet unreachable ideal.
Despair.
The space left open within the darkness of one's heart.
Hahahahahahahahaha.
Is this really it?
Hahahahahahahahaha.
Tell ,
how does soone fall in love?
Maybe I'll find out in the future.
***
"Oliver, stop talking about such superficial things... it's cringe."
"Hey! It's not superficial... why do you always have to be such a downer, Noah?"
The second-rank and third-rank humans sat beside each other, looking out into the forest.
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