A week after the event I attended as Leander Herington, the new school term began.
There was no public notice of the Order's collapse, but it was confird they had been completely shut down, with most of its mbers either dying in the midst of conflict, sentenced to prison or otherwise punished and struck with a gag order.
From that, it appeared the governnt wanted to brush the subject under the rug as much as possible. During the break, I had been contacted with a request to not speak about the matter, and of course, I obliged.
There was no need to talk any further about the Order of the Night-Ti Chrysanthemum, after all, and I was never interested in them from the beginning.
The end of an infamous group whose na originated from a dead guy who had an appreciation for poetry, perhaps.
In the end, however, it is nature's will for a flower to wilt and wither away.
They shouldn't be upset about it.
Anyway, there are more important things.
Indeed, Marcus Lynton remains on the loose.
Having abandoned his post as the head of the Order before things got too dicey, he would now be working to take over so other kind of underground organisation, rising from the shadows once more, but it will probably take about a year or two before he can actually take any further action against .
Now that the Wardens are pretty much finished with that, however, they will be looking to recapture again.
It's sothing I'll have to prepare for, but honestly, I doubt preparation is going to make much of a difference next ti. Reason being, I can't get much information from the asurent of Truth about Azaki Kiryuuin.
His existence, after returning from death, has beco shrouded in Forbidden Knowledge.
His thoughts are unreadable.
His intentions are unspecified.
His abilities are unknown.
Even when I ask what asurent he has, it says I do not have access to that information, aning it is Forbidden Knowledge.
The only reason I can think of for that being the case is that his asurent evolved sohow; most likely, it occurred when he died and sent him back to the past.
He definitely died and ca back.
After all, I can recall that, back then, it only stated that he 'died three seconds ago', not that he 'has been dead for three seconds'.
I don't know how it works, and I don't understand how his asurent could have possibly evolved post-mortem because it should have returned to its place in the void by then, but sohow, it happened.
I suppose that's exactly why it is considered Forbidden Knowledge, after all.
Sothing not intended to be known by humans.
Sothing taboo.
Either way, the Knowledge was discovered, and the truth spread.
All because of .
More precisely, because of my asurent of Truth.
It once stated that the origin of asurents was simply because that was the way the world was supposed to be.
「It is the natural order of the world」
It claid as much.
Then, is Forbidden Knowledge also natural?
Supposing it is, and taking that all into consideration, why would there naturally exist sothing that exposes exactly what the universe doesn't want being exposed?
Is the universe flawed?
Yes.
If I wanted to, I could probably just leave it at that and call it a day, but there is too much else to consider, too.
For example, the hints that there is so sort of higher being.
Thanks to everything that has been happening, I now cannot help but think about the possibility of a deity or other God-like being existing.
All the coincidences, strange happenings, and suggestions that point towards that being the case.
Of course, I cannot know for sure, but assuming sothing like that does exist, then isn't it possible that this is not a universal flaw, but instead ticulous design?
Needless to say, it's impossible to figure out with certainty why it would be by design, or if it even is, to begin with, but it's just speculation in the first place.
Perhaps, the reality is that I am being targeted by God, and all of this is a ploy by Him to screw my life up and use to destroy the world once he gets bored of it for his own amusent.
There are many other things that science cannot explain in the world, but asurents are by far the most major example.
'asurents are a creation of God, and that is why they are part of the 'natural order'.'
Like this, that grand mystery of the human race could be explained away with ease.
They are not scientific, but as a result of the direct interference of God, they do not need to make scientific sense to exist.
The strange powers known as asurents, that should not exist but do.
All those unnatural powers, the clairvoyance, the manipulation of space and ti, the power over life and death itself, they all originate from that higher being.
How else would it be possible?
And after all.
All that is needed is His will, and it shall be.
The asurent of Truth being possessed by is a plot of God, and everything that has happened thus far and that will happen in the future is all to His capricious whims.
In that case, would Araceli Arévalo be an angel? Having descended to save and the world by putting a stop to His sche.
Ah.
No, if she was opposing God, she would be a demon or devil rather than an angel, right?
Or, if taken in reverse, is God the Devil, and is Araceli Arévalo the true angel trying to put a stop to his diabolical and definitively dastardly deeds?
Hah...
Seriously, how ridiculous.
What am I doing, coming up with such ludicrous, pointless conspiracy theories?
Honestly, it's not even laughable.
...And yet.
At this point, even sothing as absurd as that doesn't sound too far-fetched...
But, it's not like I can confirm anything or otherwise, no matter the reality.
「You do not have access to this information」
―Whatever the case, in the end, what I have to do hasn't changed.
Discovering the truth, putting an end to Marcus Lynton, and getting the Wardens off my back.
Although the specifics may have changed slightly, it's more or less the sa as what I've wanted since the very beginning.
To go about doing so, however, I may need to alter my thods.
If what I'm going up against is truly a sche of God's, or of a being of equivalent calibre, then it would be foolish to assu the one who is most likely the progenitor of asurents, and hence the origin of the asurent of Truth, would fail to realise what I am up to.
I do not know the nature of said being, or even if such a being exists in the first place.
I can only assu its existence because that would be the worst case.
And assuming the worst case is the best way to prepare accordingly for disaster.
...It's difficult.
I don't even know if winning against sothing like that is possible, and not only do I not have a choice, but I also have to sohow do it without the help of the asurent of Truth.
Anything related to a higher being, whether it exists or not, is Forbidden Knowledge, and so I cannot ask any questions about it such as its intentions or true nature.
Perhaps that is for the best, though, as I wouldn't be surprised if such a being would be able to, as the presud Father of asurents, sohow influence the answers returned to by the asurent of Truth.
In order to prevent even the slightest chance of misinformation, I shouldn't trust with certainty even what the asurent of Truth tells .
All of this 'not being able to know' is what makes it so difficult and so dangerous.
The unknown.
Fear of the unknown.
What makes the unknown one of humanity's greatest natural, primal fears?
I didn't fully understand it before.
It wasn't possible for to understand it due to the nature of my ability.
But now.
Recently.
I feel as though my understanding of such a thing has firmly taken root.
I feel as though I can understand what it is like to fear the unknown.
Not being able to ask what I want to ask.
Not being able to receive the answers to what I desire or need.
Being ruthlessly denied what solace I am so used to.
I am out of my comfort zone completely, and cannot rely on what I have relied on my entire life thus far.
The unknown.
Forbidden Knowledge.
The truth of this world.
The potential existence of a higher being.
The identity of Araceli Arévalo.
I will find it all out.
That is certain.
I will not lose.
However, I am beginning to wonder.
The 'Hell' inside ; that ever-swirling black vortex of the void.
I do not know if this is a sudden realisation―a revelation―or re delusional narcissism.
But I am beginning to feel as if that 'Hell' is not what I first thought it was.
Not 'luck', but 'destiny'.
asurents do not have explicit nas. The famous ones are nad by their possessors, but usually, I am the one to assign a na for a person's ability, or if not, I simply use the na they themselves have given it.
Abilities are not born with nas, after all―they can only be granted by man.
If so, it may be that I was wrong all along.
Avon Laura is not the Concept of Destiny, but the Concept of Future.
Liam Chiba-Wallace is not the possessor of the asurent of Luck, but the asurent of Destiny.
If so, things would start to make a lot more sense.
Would I be destined for tragedy from the very beginning?
Naturally, it's not sothing I can know.
I cannot assu it is the case, because if I think I'll lose before I even try, then I will never win, and that much is certain.
Still.
That minor discomfort in the back of my mind.
Like a slight nagging.
With all this mystery.
With all this confusion.
With all this depressing shit that tells I'm destined for misery anyway.
To end this chaos, the cause of my future misery, before I have to endure it all.
To force it to a premature end, even if it is just to not let the opposition win.
Even if it is just out of spite for sothing like that.
I feel like a part of can understand.
Whether this is a feeling of catharsis in my heart even just imagining the act.
I feel a part of can even understand desiring it.
There's a fraction of such a thing in the deep corner of my mind.
What Marcus Lynton claid would happen.
What Araceli Arévalo stated she wanted to prevent.
Right.
―Destroying the world.
I guess I can imagine myself doing it after all.
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(Volu 3 END)
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