「February 3rd, the Start of Spring.」
The thick, dark red curtains couldn't entirely block out the sunlight, which imprinted a luminous square upon them.
It had been so ti since Zhou Li had set out on this journey. Travel was supposed to be relaxing, but as it dragged on, he began to feel a growing fatigue. He started to long for ho, yearning for Brother Nan. The more urgent this hosickness beca, the more acutely he sensed the weariness of the journey—not a physical exhaustion, but a fatigue of the spirit.
At that mont, he was sitting at his desk, hunched over and writing earnestly.
Tuanzi squatted on the desk, tilting her head to watch him write.
The Old Monster sat on the bed behind him, holding a box of fries. "What are you writing?"
"A diary."
"You're lying."
"Did you sneak a peek?" Zhou Li asked.
"Not yet," the Old Monster replied.
"Don't peek at my diary," Zhou Li said seriously. "You write your weekly journal, and I'll write my diary. I won't peek at yours, so don't peek at mine. Let's respect each other."
"Lord Dumpling can look!" Tuanzi turned her head and boasted to Huai Xu.
"Oh…" The Old Monster continued stuffing fries into his mouth, verbally agreeing but looking unconvinced. "What you're writing isn't a diary at all."
"Yes, it is."
"You haven't even written the month, day, day of the week, or 'sunny'."
"So you did look!" Zhou Li turned his head.
"No, I didn't! I couldn't see a thing; your back was completely blocking the view," Huai Xu said, facing Zhou Li's back. "I could tell from the way you were writing. Besides, you're not even using a notebook. You're writing on that paper we bought by the roadside yesterday. It even sounds different when you write on it... Want so fries?"
"No!"
"They're delicious!"
"No."
"Fine, suit yourself." Huai Xu shrugged. "You've been in low spirits these past couple of days."
"I'm just tired."
"You're lying."
"Don't disturb my diary writing."
"Lying again."
"…"
Zhou Li decided to ignore him and focused on his writing.
The postcard stock was stiffer than notebook paper. He was using Huai Xu's Four Seasons Textile pen. It had a mysterious resistance, making writing feel like moving across a matte surface, producing a distinct rustling sound. As the pen tip traced black lines on the paper, forming characters, the ink was still wet. When he finished a character, each stroke glistened under the window light, reflecting it, before slowly drying.
Zhou Li really liked this feeling.
This was, in fact, howork assigned by Brother Nan: write her a postcard and mail it back. Even though he would be ho in a few days, possibly arriving before the postcard, he dared not risk not sending it.
He finished writing.
He picked it up and read it aloud.
It flowed smoothly.
He admired his handwriting again, thinking it was getting better and better, and felt a small surge of pride.
He blew on the ink.
Almost dry.
Zhou Li tucked it into his notebook, placed the notebook in his bag, and planned to sneak out later that evening to mail it. He couldn't let the Old Monster see it, or he'd be rcilessly ridiculed.
Just then, the Old Monster suddenly turned his head, looking towards the curtains that seed to glow.
"It seems Yue Yin has arrived."
"Did he bring you the herbal dicine?"
"Maybe..."
"Then you should go get it."
"Okay!"
The Old Monster set down his fries on the bed. "I'll be back soon," he told them.
POOF.
The room suddenly beca very quiet.
Zhou Li walked back to the bed and sat down. Unsure what to do, he pulled out his phone, unlocked it, and mindlessly swiped the screen a couple of tis before quickly locking it again. Then, his eyes fell on the fries Huai Xu had left behind. He casually reached for them and began to eat. The taste was, at best, diocre.
Tuanzi jumped down from the desk and then onto his lap.
"OW~"
"Does Lord Dumpling want so?"
"I don't want any."
"They're really tasty."
"I don't want any."
"Alright then."
Zhou Li glanced down. Tuanzi lay quietly on his lap, looking up at him, her clear blue eyes seeming to twinkle as if with starlight.
Another POOF.
"I'm back!"
Huai Xu was holding a small wooden bottle.
Zhou Li petted Tuanzi's back. "Seems like it went smoothly."
Huai Xu scratched his head. "That fellow really keeps his word. It actually made feel a bit embarrassed."
"You just need to drink it?"
"That's what he said... but it might make fall into a deep sleep, so I need to find a safe place to drink it." Huai Xu put away the wooden bottle. "Although we're already far from Hamigua City, you never know. Anyway, after you fall asleep tonight, I'll go to the Yin Yang Temple to drink it. Don't worry; Yue Yin isn't leaving until tomorrow. I've already arranged it with him. If you run into any danger tonight, just make so noise."
"You should go now," Zhou Li said. "I'll go out for dinner later, and then I'll go to sleep."
"No rush."
"Haven't you been waiting a long ti?"
"Exactly, so there's no rush."
"Suit yourself. Here are your fries."
"Oh…"
Huai Xu took the box of fries from Zhou Li and peeked inside. Only two remained.
But he didn't seem to mind. He picked them up with two fingers, popped them into his mouth, and chewed. Then, he reached into the box, pressed his fingers against the remaining crumbs to make them stick, licked his fingers clean, and finally tossed the empty container away. Then, in a nonchalant tone, he asked Zhou Li, "Do you think if I recover my mories, I'll beco different from how I am now?"
"Hmm? Why do you ask?"
"Haven't you been thinking about it for days?"
"…"
"I think it's possible," Huai Xu nodded, savoring the lingering taste of the fries; even the crumbs had tasted good. "I've been wrestling with this question too. It's been bugging so much, I'm getting a bit frustrated."
"What are you wrestling with?"
"I'm a little afraid of him."
"Afraid of what?"
"Him. My forr self."
"Why would you be afraid of yourself?"
"What if he's different from ? Wouldn't that be like I've been possessed by soone else?" Huai Xu said.
"...That's a terrible analogy," Zhou Li muttered.
"My analogy is perfectly fine!" Huai Xu adopted a lecturing posture. "Look, my current thoughts are built on my current mories. What if I drink this and suddenly recall that I once studied the Four Books and Five Classics and the Nine Yang Divine Skill? I'd beco intelligent. Then, what if I rember being cruelly tornted by humans in the past? I'd beco hateful towards humanity. Or what if I rember many people I used to know? Compared to them, the short two years I've known you would seem insignificant, and I'd only care about those old friends... In short, that forr self would have taken over."
"It's still a terrible analogy," Zhou Li said after a pause. "And the first two things you ntioned are rather unlikely..."
"Anyway, you get the idea," Huai Xu finished, then turned to look at Zhou Li. "Wouldn't you agree?"
Zhou Li pondered this question for a long ti. In truth, he hadn't just started thinking about it when Huai Xu asked; it had been on his mind intermittently for the past two days. After considering it a while longer, he finally gave a regretful yet honest answer: "That's a complex philosophical question. With my current understanding, I can't give you an answer."
Perhaps Master Ming could...
Huai Xu groaned softly and nodded.
But just a few seconds later, Zhou Li added, "No matter what decision you make, I'll support you. And if you do beco a bit of a stranger, we'll just get to know each other all over again!"
These words gave Huai Xu courage.
"Okay!"
Huai Xu picked up the bottle. "Then I'm off!"
POOF.
Once again, only Zhou Li and Tuanzi remained in the room.
Zhou Li continued to gently stroke Tuanzi's back, feeling the confusion and concern in her gaze. His heart settled a little. He whispered, "Lord Dumpling, you knew Huai Xu before, right? Do you rember what kind of demon the old Huai Xu was? Was he very different from how he is now?"
"Not a person, ow." Tuanzi sounded puzzled.
"..." Zhou Li was speechless for a mont. "Then what kind of demon was he?"
"A fool," Tuanzi replied.
"As foolish as he is now?"
"Pretty much, ow."
"I see."
"Lord Dumpling wants to hear a story," Tuanzi declared.
"How about I tell you one when I get back?"
"Are we going out, ow?"
"Yes."
Zhou Li decided to go out. While Huai Xu was away, he would mail the postcard he had written for Brother Nan.
And take a walk as well.
「At ten o'clock that night, the air conditioner was terribly noisy.」
Zhou Li lay in bed, holding Tuanzi, and whispered a fable to her: "So, what happened to this person in the end? Of course, he was discovered, caught, and beaten severely. It hurt terribly. So, what lesson does this story teach us?"
"Hmm?" Hearing no response from Tuanzi, Zhou Li called her na again, "Lord Dumpling."
"You shouldn't steal bells," Tuanzi finally replied.
"It's about not deceiving yourself," Zhou Li said earnestly. "It ans you shouldn't deceive yourself just to deceive others. If you do that, you certainly won't fool anyone."
Tuanzi was quiet for a mont.
"Lord Dumpling doesn't like this story. Tell another one," she demanded, not forgetting to add, "Not this kind."
"..."
"Hurry up and tell one."
"It's very late," Zhou Li said, feeling tired. "Can we sleep now?"
"Mmm..."
"I'm tired," he repeated.
"Okay."
So Zhou Li got up and turned off the light.
The room instantly plunged into darkness. He lay with his eyes open but didn't fall asleep for a long ti.
Thoughts of Huai Xu kept surfacing in his mind.
Perhaps Huai Xu has drunk the potion and is now fast asleep at Zheng Zhilan's house. No, maybe not at her house, maybe in so tree in the mountains. Perhaps he's about to wake up. Perhaps he'll sleep for another two days. Perhaps he's dreaming, reliving all his past experiences, experiences that now feel entirely unfamiliar to him...
Zhou Li hadn't wanted to dwell on it, but he couldn't help himself.
Because while humans are made of cells, a person is made of mories. The reason you are you, and I am I, is primarily determined by our mories. Since coming into this world, every event you've experienced, everything you've witnessed, the education you've received, the calamities you've suffered, the storms you've weathered, the tenderness you've felt, every period of ti you've lived through—these countless fragnts accumulate in your mind like a mountain, forming the person you are now. So things you might even have forgotten, but that doesn't an you've discarded them. In fact, they continue to exist in another form, etched deep within your mind, becoming part of your personality. These mories will undoubtedly influence Huai Xu. This isn't necessarily a bad thing for him. It's just...
Zhou Li didn't know the Huai Xu of the past.
In fact, these past few days, he had already noticed subtle changes in Huai Xu. But he couldn't bring himself to say to Huai Xu what he was thinking: The Huai Xu of the past feels like a stranger to , so please, just stay as you are now.
He couldn't.
Thus, he felt a sense of unease.
Gradually, amidst this unease, he fell asleep.
「The morning of the 4th.」
Zhou Li woke up groggily to the pervasive aroma of roasted lamb filling the room.
He got up and looked. Huai Xu had already returned! He was sitting in the chair Zhou Li had used to write the postcard the day before, eating lamb skewers. His legs were spread wide, gripping a trash can between them. He was hunched over, head down, so all the seasoning powder and oil dripping from the skewers fell directly into the trash can.
Noticing he was awake, Huai Xu turned his head and asked, "Want so lamb skewers? I just went to Lanzhou to buy them."
His mouth was covered in oil.
Zhou Li rubbed his eyes, paused for a mont, then asked, "You're back already?"
"Yup!"
"That was quick."
"Were you expecting it to take half a month?"
"So, how was it?"
"I suspect this stuff is a counterfeit," Huai Xu said, his whole face scrunching up. "It tasted like plain water with a hint of mud. It was completely useless; I only slept for one night. Do you think it's possible that fellow regretted it after he left? Maybe he didn't want to give the real thing, so he just found so tap water sowhere and filled the bottle with it?"
"Maybe your situation is special," Zhou Li said, massaging his head thoughtfully. "Or perhaps its effect isn't that potent. Maybe it just aids in recovery, and you'll gradually start rembering things later on."
"Maybe... So, are you eating or not?"
"Hold on."
"Hurry, hurry."
"Don't rush ."
Zhou Li scratched his head, quickly got dressed, and climbed out of bed to start on the incredibly greasy breakfast.
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