(Arata)
"Calm down, Moonshine. We know, we know everything," Baba tried to take my face in his hands but I shook my head.
"Noo, where is Karsten? Tell the police didn’t capture him. He is innocent, Baba. Ranold frad him," I frantically said, unable to control the beatings of my heart. They kept surging.
"The police have figured that out. Karsten hasn’t been captured. Relax," Baba answered with a hardened jaw, his eyes held animosity for him.
I knew I had fucked up...Baba knew everything, and he wasn’t going to forgive Karsten or .
"What about Ranold? Did they capture him? Did Karsten reach him first?" I had so many questions and knew Baba wouldn’t answer all of them.
"The police haven’t found Ranold. No one knows where he is. Karsten said he escaped when he and his n entered Ranold’s house," Baba explained but I could sense this wasn’t the truth.
Only Karsten knew the whole truth and I needed to speak to him. Not that I was going to forgive him that easily or trust him again but he saved my life on more than one occasion.
He was an asshole but I owed that asshole.
"I want to speak to him. Is he here?" I carefully asked and Baba went still. His forehead developed several creases.
"You don’t have to speak to a manipulator and a liar. He endangered your life, Arata, by lying to you and deceiving you. Tell you are not in love with him," Baba asked quietly and firmly. I could feel the disappointnt lining his voice.
I had no answer for him.
Everything was chaos for , nothing made sense.
"Baba, can we have this conversation later? I just need five minutes with him, alone. Please," I requested, trying not to cry.
Baba lowered his head, he seed so tired. The dark circles around his eyes showed he hadn’t slept in God knows how long.
That’s what I had wanted to avoid. To stress him, to let him find out my secrets.
"Alright, Arata. But once you are better, we are going back ho, and you will have no contact with this man. I want him out of your life." He stood up and stared at with the seriousness of a father who didn’t wish to be more disappointed in his daughter than he already was.
I was ashad, to say the least.
He wanted Karsten out of my life? The thought was disturbing on so many levels, but wasn’t that what I had been planning all along, too?
So why did my heart beco so restless?
I wondered if Baba knew about my pregnancy too, and if that was the main reason behind his decision. He hadn’t ntioned it so maybe the doctors hadn’t told him.
"Take your ti on this decision, Arata. But I will never approve of him. Never." Baba walked out with these words, leaving wondering.
What was I even going to say to Karsten?
My mind was so conflicted. We had parted on such horrible terms.
Finding out his deepest secrets, the ones mingled with false allegations, Ranold had pushed into believing.
I never gave Karsten ti or opportunity to explain his side. I was so blinded by distrust and painted him as the bad guy.
Not that he wasn’t one but I could have put him behind bars for cris he hadn’t committed. And now his secret was out and my family knew, most probably the police did too.
Why did he need to hide behind a mask and record those kinds of videos?
So many questions, maybe it was ti to let him explain as he had asked the last ti.
To hear him out would be the best decision.
I stared at the blank white walls of the room, lost in thoughts of what I was to even say to him?
Should I tell him about my pregnancy?
Was he even prepared for that?
How would he even react?
His troubled voice broke through my reverie and my head slowly turned to find him standing by the closed door of my room.
Tired, dishevelled, stubbled jaw as if he hadn’t shaved in a long ti.
But those intense eyes of his, burnt with molten emotions, silent regrets and whispering remorse.
For a breathless forever—we only locked gazes, letting the unsaid words echo between us.
The electric silence between us stretched until he unpeeled himself from the door and strode forward.
"Took you long enough to find ..." I couldn’t take my eyes off him.
"And I told you white is not your colour," he answered in that guttural voice of his which always hit in the guts.
Karsten lowered himself into the chair Baba had left. His hands carefully rested near mine on the bed but he didn’t touch .
A phoenix tattoo now decorated the back of his right hand. I wanted to ask about it but I held my tongue.
That made awkwardly smile and it reflected on his face too.
A tired smile slowly crept up on his lips.
He seed different and yet he was the sa. Sothing had happened while I went missing. Was it grief? Or sothing else?
For a few monts he just watched with adoration. Exactly how he used to do before that bloody Winter Gala night, which changed everything for us.
"I don’t know where to begin but an apology seems like the best option." He leaned closer, and the smile disappeared, replaced by shadows of remorse and regret.
"I am sorry for everything. For breaking your trust, your heart..." The pain intensified on his face. "For hurting you with those words on the day of the Winter Gala. I swear I didn’t an that. I was just trying to push you away."
I silently listened. He did push away. His words had left a gaping hole in my heart that I wasn’t even sure any words could fill.
"You turned away, Karsten," I answered with a sigh. The bandages on my face itched with every effort I made to speak.
"I knew the stalker was trying to pin us against each other. So I thought if we would act estranged he might give up on the idea of hurting you through . I never wanted to hurt you, Arata. You are so special to . You and this child both." His saddened eyes wavered towards my belly and my heart almost stopped pounding.
He knew—he knew that I was pregnant.
The doctor must have told him.
"You know?" I asked my voice barely a whisper, my heart aching as to what his decision regarding the baby would be.
"I saw the pregnancy test kit in your bag the very day you were taken," he ashadly admitted, his head hung low.
"The pain of that mont was imnse. The thought that you didn’t trust enough to share it with ..." his eyes lingered on my belly as the light fell on his tightened jaw, revealing he was barely holding on.
I had believed he wasn’t ready.
And then he pleadingly asked, "Can I touch your belly?"
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