AiLin was taken aback by ngYan’s request to talk privately with Li ZiChen. As she was wary, she was about to question him why, but suddenly, Li ZiChen smiled and nodded his head, agreeing, "Sure, if it’s only a talk."
AiLin then turned to him, receiving a gentle rub on her back as he looked over her, "I’ll be talking with him just for a bit, be careful and specially stays sowhere with a lot of people."
She pressed her lips together, chuckling, "Mhm, but.."
"Don’t worry, I have a good feeling about this," he said before he looked at her again and then going with ngYan toward the balcony. She saw them from afar, noting their figure as they exchange conversation. Both of them seed to be smiling so she noted that it wasn’t a serious talk and perhaps it wasn’t about the past.
"A drink, miss?"
AiLin heard the words from the server and shook her head but when the server insisted, "I do think it’s a sweet drink that you would like," did she turn her head and was taken aback upon seeing Bai HaiZe.
He was dressed in a maroon suit, a smile on his lips that matched the rest of his romantic look. Even the nearby won couldn’t help but gaze at him for a long ti, their eyes softening as if they had just seen a prince straight out of a fairy tale. Bai HaiZe had always carried himself with a natural charisma, effortlessly drawing attention without even trying.
But sohow, AiLin felt unsettled seeing him here even though she knew the party from him and knew he would be here, she had ignored his texts on purpose, and that made her feel both guilty and burdened to see him.
"You look gorgeous tonight, AiLin," he made the first remark, looking at her endearing while her smile spread in an awkward pause.
"You look... good too," she looked down at his shoes and a sharp pain hit her a little. She held her head where it ached and looked back at him, "So you ca here today, I didn’t know that your family is acquainted with the Huas."
"Oh, they’re not," he responded, "A good friend of mine is and due to our connection, I received the envelope to co here. I heard about it," he then started the conversation again, "That you’re actually from the Hua Family. If back then you had known about this, maybe..."
"They would stop bullying ?" AiLin smiled as she saw Bai HaiZe who seed to turn quiet at her question. "That won’t happen unfortunately, HaiZe. As you know, the reason why they had bullied wasn’t but because there was no adult in my life that could help . Though you’re correct perhaps if my real family had known about what had happened, they would be on my side."
"I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have reminded you of the past..."
She shook her head at his saddened expression, answering softly, "No, I understand that you have a lot of... regrets, I have them to about the past but it is the past and I hope you could walk out of it."
Bai HaiZe furrowed his eyebrows and his gaze plead to her, "No, AiLin. I do have regrets. A lot of regrets but I wish not to change them. I love you, and that love is not regret. I don’t regret that I had loved you and I know you think that my love for you stemd from guilt but you have to understand that my love for you isn’t regret."
He held her hands and though she could feel her skin crawl from anyone’s fingertips, she saw his sadness and couldn’t simply swat his hands off.
"I love you."
The past seed to have ran back to her mind, the thoughts of her sufferings always ca across her head whenever she looked at Bai HaiZe’s face. It was a love that he expressed so sincerely and that was why it hurts more for her to hear his profession of love. Exactly because instead of happiness that ca from those words, she feels a sense of fear.
After that feeling of fear, she feels guilty.
"I’m sorry," she expressed her words, looking deep into his brown eyes. "I’m sorry, I can’t feel the sa way about you."
Bai HaiZe’s fingers tightened around AiLin’s hands, his grip trembling slightly, as if he were holding onto sothing fragile, sothing that was slipping eaftn’t give up. He cannot give up now after everything...
"AiLin... don’t say that," he pleaded, his voice raw with emotion. "I know you’re scared, I know the past hurt you... but I can love you enough to make up for it. I know, I know you have soone who loves you but I also know that I won’t fall behind in my love for you. I don’t care how long it takes, I’ll prove it to you. You don’t have to give an answer right now, just... just don’t shut out."
She felt a pang in her chest, but she didn’t waver. Instead, she gently pulled her hands away, placing them between them like a barrier. She shook her head,
"HaiZe..." she whispered. "It’s not about ti. It’s not about proving anything. I just don’t love you that way. I have soone I love, it’s not an excuse, HaiZe. You have been in the party long enough to have seen what I ant. That man, Li ZiChen, he is the one I have decided to stay with."
He stared at her, as if trying to decipher so hidden aning in her words, hoping, praying, that there was sothing she wasn’t saying, so small loophole he could cling to. But her gaze was unwavering, and slowly, realization set in.
His shoulders slumped. The fire in his eyes dimd, replaced by sothing softer, heavier.
"I see..." His voice was quiet now, nearly lost beneath the chatter of the party around them.
AiLin expected more resistance, but instead, he let out a quiet chuckle, one that carried more sadness than humor. "You know, I used to think that if I tried hard enough, if I just stayed by your side long enough... maybe one day, you’d look at the way you look at him."
She didn’t need to ask who he ant.
"But love doesn’t work like that, does it?" he murmured, rubbing the back of his neck as he looked away. "I just... I just wanted to be the person who could make you happy. But I guess I was always just the person who reminded you of things you wanted to forget."
Her heart clenched at his words, but she stayed silent. It wasn’t a heartache that ca from regretting her decision. It was a heartache that ca from guilt.
A deep breath, then a small, bittersweet smile. "Alright," Bai HaiZe said, stepping back. "I won’t push anymore."
There was sothing achingly final in those words. AiLin opened her mouth, but no words ca out.
"Just... be happy, AiLin." His smile faltered, but he forced it to stay. "That’s all I ever wanted."
And with that, he turned and walked away.
Seeing him leaving, she let out a heavy exhale that she didn’t know she held for so long. Turns out, deep inside her heart, she had always felt guilty. So guilty. After all with soone so kind as him who had helped her, the next thing she should have done was to accept him as a thank.
But heart doesn’t work that way. Just because she felt touched by his kindness, it doesn’t an that love can bloom from there.
Sighing softly, AiLin took a drink from the nearby place, shaking her head as the night was far too long for her. At first it was Elder Hua, then it was Su HaiTan, and now?
It’s Bai HaiZe.
Though she should be thankful that at least tonight, her relationship with Bai HaiZe has ended and he had accepted her words, trying to move forward. She felt guilty for him, but he should start living his own life now, soone... kind as him.
As she took another sip of her drink, she reached out to her purse, thinking to take her dicine when she realized that it was in Li ZiChen’s hands.
She turned back and look at him who was still talking to ngYan, wondering what talks do they have which still hadn’t ended.
anwhile, Li ZiChen who had been talking to ngYan was just shaken by the words that ngYan had said. His light brown eyes shook, his lips slightly parted in disbelief as he processed ngYan’s words. The party noise around them seed to fade into the background as if the entire world had narrowed down to just this conversation.
"Do you know the weight of your words, Mr. Su?" Li ZiChen finally asked, his voice unusually quiet.
ngYan let out a dry chuckle, swirling the scarlet liquid in his glass before taking a slow sip. "Do I look like soone who jokes about things like this?" he asked, his sharp eyes never leaving Li ZiChen’s face.
Li ZiChen clenched his jaw, looking away for a brief mont. His fingers curled into a fist, but he forced himself to relax. "And you expect to just believe you?" he questioned, his voice carrying an edge now. "After all this ti, you co to with this information, expecting for- what? The fact that you hid this for so long... was it done on purpose?"
ngYan sighed, setting his drink down on the balcony ledge. "I am rely soone who watch from afar, I don’t know what I could do which is acceptable," he admitted. "I just thought you deserved to know."
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