Ye Jie listened to Xu y without any intention of disturbing. The content of her story was exactly what he saw in the video but the context was completely contrasting. The video only showed the way Xu y ruptured an artery of Xu Liqing, hurting her pretty badly. Also, the other content of the video was when Xu y pushed that waiter away from herself and he ended up rolling down the stairs. In spite of the fact that Ye Jie was a keen believer of the phrase; Believe nothing of what you hear, and only half of what you see, he still couldn’t stop himself from believing every word that ca out of Xu y’s mouth.
Her state was right before his very eyes.
He saw the way Xu y’s body was shudderring. She appeared to be living that night all over again. She kept biting her bottom lip making it bleed a bit. Her face was blanched and she stood rooted at the sa spot looking at a certain location in a stupor.
Ye Jie ca behind her and held her trembling body in his arms with her back facing his chest. He made her head lie against his chest and kept rolfing her arms up and down to relax her.
His calloused hand’s warmth made Xu y feel at ho. His familiar touch, and the familiar scent helped to diminish the turmoil in her heart and mind. She let herself loosen up in his arms and found the courage to speak again.
At the age of 12 when she wasn’t even considered a teenager, she had to see that bloody scene right in front of her and it left a huge stain on her ntal health.
She wasn’t considered healthy from the ti she was born. The doctors have said from her early age that due to lack of nourishnt, Xu y’s ntal health was weak and she was advised not to overwhelm her mind with thoughts.
But with Fu Lan and Xu Liqing around, how could she possibly have a relaxed mind? She had to take prescribed dicine for her mind from a young age but who knew that those ds were actually worsening her ntal state.
After that incident at the rooftop, Xu y stayed in a coma for 10 days and when she woke up, she found herself in an unfamiliar surrounding.
Everything was white in the huge room even her clothes were white. For a mont she thought that she was dead but then her father, Xu Cheng walked inside the room with Fu Lan tagging along. She saw her father taking a seat beside her bed.
Xu Cheng held her small hand in own with a depressed look on his face. "What is this place, dad?" Even though her throat was stinging, she had to speak out loud. She was having a bad premonition and her heart was beating uncontrollably fast.
"This is a Rehabilitation Center." She heard her father’s gentle voice but it shook her entire being. "You’re going to stay here for a while, Xiao y."
"No! Please, dad, don’t leave here! I’m absolutely fine. Why do you want to push away from yourself? I’ll go back to the boarding school, just don’t leave here." Xu y’s young, small self was pleading to her father while the tears stread down her face without any restraint.
But her words had little to no effect on Xu Cheng. He rubbed his forehead and said, "Xiao y, if you’re having issues in school, you should have told about it. Why did you resort to drugs?" Seeing the accusation in her own father’s eyes, Xu y was terribly taken aback.
Xu y was frozen still on the bed she was lying on with nothing left to explain to him at all. When Xu Cheng saw her rigid body, he didn’t know what he could do. He just wanted to help her. So what if she wasn’t his own blood, she had the blood of the woman he loved the most in his life.
He was about to leave the room when he heard Xu y’s weak voice, "Did you have the ti to listen to ?" Xu Cheng turned his body look at her bloodshot eyes staring back at him with an assertion. That look was completely foreign to Xu Cheng who always saw Xu y as a weak and timid girl. "Even if I’d told you that dad, I’m being bullied in school every single day. Would you have cared?"
"Of course, I’d have cared. I’d have tried to help you. After all, you’re my..." He closed his eyes taking a deep breath. "My daughter." Although it wasn’t easy to accept it that Xu y was not his own blood but he never loved her any lesser. He always tried to be her father.
"Did you treat as a daughter?" She asked and laughed in a self-mocking manner. "It doesn’t matter at this point. You’re just like that mother of mine." After saying that, Xu y turned to lay on her side not willing to see Xu Cheng anymore.
There was silence in the room for a mont before Xu y heard the sound of door closing.
"In the end, I’m just an abandoned girl." She spoke bitterly in a soft voice. Up until now, she was scared of saying it out loud. Scared of the fact that if she accepted those words, they will eventually co true. And that was exactly what was happening with her.
"You’re absolutely right." Xu y heard a conceited voice right beside her ear. She knew the voice belonged to Fu Lan and that scared her even more. She tried to cower back in fear. "You are indeed abandoned yet again. And don’t worry. No one will abandon you again." Fu Lan touched Xu y’s pale cheek making her feel disgusted by her touch. "Because no one will be able to enter your life again. Then how can soone abandon you if no one is left in your life?"
"Do you know why I hate you so much?" Xu y managed to shook her head from side to side. "I can’t help it. Who told you to be born in this world? You could have chosen any other ho, why did you have to be the firstborn of the Xu family?" Xu y was shuddering terribly by the nacing look in her eyes. "Don’t bla for being cruel. Bla your own mother who abandoned you."
Fu Lan stood up from the side of her bed intending to leave but she halted abruptly and before Xu y could make any sense of the situation, Fu Lan had slapped her right on her face with a strong force. "How dare you hurt my daughter?" She delivered another crisp slap on Xu y’s face. "I love my daughter the most and you know it." Another slap landed on her already stinging face. "Yet you hurt her so badly?" Fu Lan kept slapping her face until it was swollen up like a sponge cake.
"Now, you’re not just a drug addict." Fu Lan smiled conceitedly, "Now, you’re a murderer as well with unstable ntal health. In short, I’ve turned you into a retarded person for the world."
After her anger subsided, she left Xu y alone to cry on her own with a badly hurting face. Before she even knew it, Xu y’s whole world was pushed into an endless abyss of darkness. She was abandoned at the ti when she needed the support of her loved ones the most.
’How could I kill soone? No! No!’
’But you did!’
’You’re a murderer.’
’You killed an innocent waiter!’
’You’re supposed to be in prison not here in a Rehab Center.’
’You deserve to be abandoned.’
’Who would love or want a devil like you who killed an innocent person?’
’You should be ashad of yourself.’
Xu y felt like she could hear the mocking from the people around her. As if the whole world was pointing a finger at her in accusation. She shook her head and covered her ears trying to get rid of all the voices around her. But she forgot that the voices ca from her own frenzied mind. And there is no way to get rid of guilt. It stays...
It stays like a never-ending cycle pushing you towards your doom. We all are guilty of sothing in our lives. But so are left with only guilt to accompany them till death.
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