[Part 3/4]
The evening was approaching. The sunlight peeking through the cloudy sky typical of the northern winter was fading beyond the horizon. The view was slowly, but surely, growing dark and hazy...
"...Alright. Let's go over there."
I retrace my steps, stepping on the footprints I left behind, and then leap into the bushes to cover my tracks. I disguise them and head in a different direction. It's a classic trick. I wonder how well I can hide my trail. If it's a skilled hunter, it shouldn't be too hard to see through.
"Hey. It's about ti..."
"I wanted to escape a bit further, but..."
I hesitate at my mother's words about the rice. I hesitate, but... it was indeed getting dark around us. Wandering in the night mountains any longer would be a death wish.
"Then over there... for sure, it's there!"
I found the cloth I had wrapped around as a marker and called my mother and sister over.
"Big brother, what is this?"
"A secret base..."
That was my sister's question about the cave peeking out from the snow and my reply.
...I wasn't so optimistic that I hadn't prepared for the possibility of my sister's existence being discovered or having to escape the village for so reason. I had at least looked for a place in the mountains where we could take shelter for a night while working. I hoped it wouldn't end up being a wasted effort.
"Wait a bit. I'm going to check inside."
I told my family that and entered the cave. It seed like there were no beasts inside. I got rid of a few bugs that were there. Once I secured the safety, I called my mother and sister over. I stuck a governnt-issued talisman on the entrance. I wanted to pray that it would work.
"If only the pursuers would go away..."
As I muttered that while sticking the talisman, I understood the aning of my words and fell into self-loathing. I didn't particularly like the villagers, but they weren't the kind of people I would want to feed to youkai. It was only natural that we were being chased, and if they had just gotten rid of my newborn sister, it would have been the end of the story.
"Big brother...?"
"Ah!? Shirona?"
I was surprised by the call and looked down at my sister, who had co close. She was looking up at anxiously...
"Hurry, let's go inside? Let's eat, okay?"
My sister spoke, tugging at my sleeve. Seeing that I didn't respond, she smiled as if trying to cheer herself up and called out again, "Okay?"
"...Yeah. You're right. Let's eat."
I rubbed my sister's head vigorously to chase away her worries. Just like that, her anxious expression disappeared. She squinted her eyes and purred happily. We headed deeper into the cave. Our mother was sitting on a mat, finishing up the al preparations.
"Here's so hot water. It's a bit cold though..."
"Thank you."
I drank the hot water from the thermos my mother handed . It had been boiled and sterilized at ho, but it had long since cooled down and was just a little warm. Unfortunately, it was impossible to start a fire since we were being chased.
"Is this all the food we have?"
There was so dried rice soaked in hot water, a few dried goods, and so pickled vegetables. And miso. It was barely enough to satisfy our hunger.
"We don't know how many days we'll be walking in the mountains. It's better to save it."
The food supply was desperate. It would be great if we could sohow find so wild mountain food, but... there were only a few mountain vegetables that could be gathered in winter.
"Big brother, mom. Food..."
While we were having that conversation, Shirona urged us impatiently. Growing kids are always hungry.
"Sorry, sorry. ...Well then, shall we eat?"
"Yeah!"
Listening to my sister's wish, we started our al. I mixed the soaked rice with miso in the bowl and nibbled on the pickled vegetables... it was a simple dinner.
"Ugh..."
In my life, I probably walked farther and longer than ever before. My sister quickly finished her bowl of rice, driven by hunger. She stared at her empty bowl with a longing, pitiful look.
"Shirona, there's so left... do you want to eat it?"
Seeing her so pitiful made want to help, and the fact that she didn't ask for it even though she was clearly hungry was endearing. I suggested it to her. When I showed her the half-full bowl of rice, her eyes sparkled. But she imdiately shook her head.
"Big brother, the bags were heavy, right? You must be hungrier than , right? So, it's okay!"
"Shirona..."
Even though she must be just as hungry, my little sister replied bravely. She smiled to avoid worrying . Her young and pure kindness made feel really guilty. I realized that I had never been able to feed this small family until their bellies were full.
"...Shirona, you can eat mom's food, okay?"
"Eh, but..."
"Mother, that's..."
Shirona looked confused at our mother's suggestion, and I was about to say I'd give her my food instead. However, mother cut us off.
"Just listen to your mom this ti. Shirona is small and tired, right? You shouldn't hold back when your body is weak. You might collapse. ...And Tomobe, as a boy, you need to do the heavy work, so you absolutely can't hold back. When it cos down to it, you're the one we rely on, okay? So, eat properly."
Saying this, she offered a bowl to Shirona. At the sa ti, she pushed a bag full of winter berries that I had collected for the winter toward .
"Eat up. Got it?"
It was the second ti she gave a command that seed even more forceful. But knowing mother's usual personality, it was actually kindness. It was her way of giving us permission to eat. Mother was doing her best to fulfill her role as a mother.
"Big brother..."
Shirona looked at , unsure of what to do, torn between reason and instinct. She was seeking my judgnt... when a pitiful sound echoed from her small belly. The little white fox drooped its ears and tail, frowning.
"Uuuh..."
"Phew. ...Mother is saying it. Eat up. ...Alright, I'll enjoy the al."
I felt a small smile at my sister's embarrassnt over her own weakness. Then I took the pouch and started eating the winter strawberries one by one. I bit into the fruit. It burst in my mouth, releasing its juice. Honestly, it wasn't very sweet. But it definitely had nutrients. It was a feast. I made sure to eat it in a way that showed how delicious it was.
"I-I'm going to eat now!!"
Shirona must have been at her limit of hunger. Seeing eat gave her the push she needed. She declared it while drooling.
"Nom, munch. Mmm...!!"
Then she took the bowl with both hands and started eating desperately. She was practically gulping it down, and soon her cheeks relaxed with happiness. She must have been really hungry. Seeing her belly full and smiling made both and our mother feel relieved. I couldn't help but smile too.
It was a simple yet enjoyable alti. However, it didn't last long. By the ti we finished eating, it was almost completely dark outside the cave.
"You two should go to sleep first. I'll take turns watching, okay?"
Mother would keep watch first, then it would be my turn. Shirona had the least stamina. I should let her rest properly. She said she wanted to help, but I cald her down and tucked her in. In the back of the cave, I layered blankets and warm clothes on her to help her sleep.
"Mother, are you really okay?"
"I'm happy you're worried, but don't underestimate , okay? I'm an adult, after all."
When I called out to Mother, who was sitting on the rocks at the cave entrance, she replied with a wry smile. Then she looked at with a complicated expression...
"...I'm sorry, okay? I got you involved in sothing terrible."
Mother's voice was heavy with regret. It was clear what she was apologizing for. If she hadn't hesitated, things wouldn't have turned out this way. But...
"Mother, it's not your fault."
"But, if I had been ready back then, it wouldn't have turned out like this!"
With a trembling voice that held regret, my mother whispered as she held her head in her hands. Her face was filled with anguish, filled with remorse, atdemonng, confessing...
"If only I hadn't involved you... If it were just the two of us, maybe we could have lived quietly!"
A single tear fell as my mother said this. But I couldn't simply bla her for what she said. She was just soone who wanted to live peacefully and quietly.
"...Shirona is an important little sister. She's family. So, Mother, you're not at fault. I don't regret anything either."
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