Hui gritted his teeth, frustrated. Im missing sothing. But what? What do I need to do?
Ive never been able to combine life and death inside without the two negating one another, and yet, phoenix fire seems to inherently combine the two, as if theres no difficulty in combining them at all. Is it the fire aspect? Ive never had much karma with fire. Ive had plenty of karma with my foes using fire against , but using it myself? I did have the housecat fire talisman, but I wasnt any better at using it than any other talisman. anwhile, Gui Delun approached fire as the first step to understanding life qi, and Han Qin well, he was the disciple of this woman, or sothing. Sohow involved with her.
Gui Delun used fire as an approach to life qi. Could it be? Are fire and life qi inextricably linked, the beginner and the advanced form of the sa energy, and I rely accidentally took the expert course without having discovered the beginner course?
He pressed his lips together. When I think about Masters approach to teaching I cant say its impossible.
He looked at the woman. Inspiration flickered in his eyes. She has life and death qi within her. If I can experience her existence, wont I experience what its like to have life and death qi coexist inside without any separation? Once I experience it, Ill easily be able to understand how to accomplish it myself! Or, rather, its a good first step to take on the road to comprehension. Examples are always important for learning, always important!
But to experience an existence like hers, constantly cycling between life and death
Her life is unstable, but the life and death qi inside her appear stable. Sothing else is going wrong. Sothing that might an that though life and death qi can coexist, it cant happen inside a cultivator. Or sothing that might an shes rely had a qi deviation, and its entirely possible.
I cant find out without syncing with her.
Hui took a deep breath.
The flas died. Ashes dropped to the bottom of the barrier.
If anyone can ntally survive the experience of being eternally trapped in a cycle of life and death, its . I have to believe in my ntal resilience. Believe in myself!
Believe in myself
No, no. Thats a fools act. Its absolutely foolish! Im a small cultivator who cant accomplish anything. I
The ashes reford, becoming a fetus. Hui flinched. I have to do it now. Now, or shell light on fire, and itll be too late.
Im ntally resilient. I can do this.
Im ntally resilient, for this worlds standards. Can anyone survive that kind of experience?
If I cant, my children die.
Hui scowled. Am I going to let this stop ? This, which tests my one strength, my ntal resilience? No! I refuse! Im a coward, but backing down from this is too much!
Settling his mind, he reached out with his thread and touched the infant. Before it could destroy his thread or refuse the connection, he threw himself inside. Sync. Connect. I need to know!
The world swirled around him. He lost track of his orientation, of up and down, of the way forward and the way back. Sinking into the thread, he fell into the infant before him.
Darkness. Heat. Confusion. The infant twitched, shifting slightly.
Hui let out a breath. Its not as bad as I
A thousand screams. Words he barely understood, flooding into his mind. Emotions charged after the words, overwhelming him. Anger. Fury. Frustration. Loss. Fear. Despair. Hui struggled, fighting against the tide, but it smashed into him and dragged him down. He plumted, sucked into the depths. Fire burned through his mind, tearing him apart.
Shit! Play dead!
Hui went limp, and the raging fire passed over him. The emotions, the pain, the agony, they surged into him and overpowered him, and nothing remained. He beca nothing but another of thousands of voices, all screaming out, howling alongside the flas.
Let go.
Burn! Burn to death!
Im so tired.
Why? WHY!
Father, mother! Help!
Kill her! KILL HER!
I want to die I want to die
Stop! I wont let you!
death death death death death death
It hurts it hurts soone help please help
Help.
The flas burned hotter and hotter. The womans body grew, and so too did the flas. The entire orb broiled. Huis thread of qi burned up, and the barrier closed over.
--
In a distant space, hidden away in an entirely different small realm enclosed outside the three main realms, Han Qins eyes snapped open. He sat upright, gripping the arms of his throne.
That sensation. It cant be. He couldnt have
He sat back in his chair, letting out a harrumph. No. Its impossible. I must be sensing a flare-up of the fire I put into his soul. After all, hes dead. Or rather he was. Perhaps hes been reborn, and thats the surge Im sensing.
Closing his eyes and folding his legs, Han Qin rested his fingertips together and circulated his qi, entering a ditative state. An orb of phoenix fire burned in the center of his arced fingers, circulating slowly in ti with his qi. He frowned. His brows furrowed, and the frown turned into a scowl. It cant be. I refuse
A phoenix appeared out of the orb of phoenix fire. With a sharp cry, it took to the air, winging forth for a re mont before it drooped back into the fla.
Han Qins eyes flew open, bloodshot. He slamd his hand down on the arm of his throne, straining almost upright from sheer tension. How? How!
His hand curled into a fast. He stepped from his throne, every step heavy, every gesture laden with long-denied desire. His hands shook, and his knees trembled.
A smile spread across his lips. Worshipfully, he whispered, He found her.
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