I was just getting back ho after a long day of pretending to be a responsible adult. You know—surviving work, dodging bills, and ntally preparing myself for the circus that is my household.
Right as I reached my apartnt building, I spotted Fiona near the entrance.
Our eyes t for a split second.
"Hey, Fiona!" I waved.
And then—she sprinted. Full-on ani run, hugging her bag like a damsel in a shoujo series, weeping.
I stood there like a confused NPC.
"...What the heck was that about?" I scratched my head. "Did I forget her birthday?
Sighing, I took the stairs—too lazy to wait for the elevator. Life with dragons surprisingly improves your cardio.
Ding dong.
Before I could even lower my hand, the door swung open.
"Welco ho, Papa!" Elena greeted , eyes sparkling like she just spotted a unicorn made of sugar.
"What did you bring? Did you bring sothing?! Sothing sweet?!"
This girl had snack radar sharper than most military-grade equipnt.
From behind her, Her Royal Grumpiness erged—Erza, Dragon Queen of a terrifying ancient race, now a full-ti freeloader in my 1BHK apartnt.
She crossed her arms.
"Hey, mortal. Did you bring what I asked for?"
I grinned. "Of course. How could I forget my mighty Lizard Queen's divine request?"
She narrowed her eyes. "Stop calling that."
I fished through the grocery bag like I was unboxing a treasure chest.
"This one's for you, Elena."
"ICE CREAM!? YAAAY!!" She grabbed it and bounced like she'd just achieved world peace.
"And this..." I turned to Erza, holding up a dium-sized box with a dramatic flair.
"...is for you."
She raised an eyebrow. "Chocolate ice cream?"
"I figured you might like it."
She squinted suspiciously. "How did you know I like chocolate?"
"I don't know... my heart told ."
She stared at with pure judgnt.
"Humans are so weird."
Still, she took the box and dug in. And then
Inner Erza: Oh my stars... this is divine. Sweet. Bitter. Smooth. What is this sorcery?! I must never let him see the pleasure.
"Not bad," she muttered coolly, despite clearly ascending to flavor heaven.
I smirked. "See? Told you. My heart never lies."
She rolled her eyes. "Yeah, yeah. Your 'heart' or whatever."
Elena was out cold on the couch, an empty ice cream cup still clutched in her tiny hands like a war trophy. A drop of lted sweetness dangled from the corner of her mouth.
"She's down for the count," I whispered, slowly draping a blanket over her. "Sleep well, sugar gremlin."
I slipped into my sleepwear—read: the nearest pair of boxers and a T-shirt that may or may not belong to Erza—and collapsed into bed with the grace of a tranquilized rhino.
The TV murmured in the background. Erza was still out there, binge-watching so overly dramatic cooking show where chefs scread like they were summoning demons every ti soone cut an onion.
I closed my eyes.
Darkness.
Peace.
Then... dreamland.
A beautiful adow. Birds chirping. Flowers blooming.
And there it was.
A lon. No, the lon. Glorious. Radiant. Fluffy.
Like destiny itself had blessed it with heavenly squishiness.
I reached for it, fingers trembling in reverence.
Squish.
Soft. Warm. Real.
Wait.
TOO real.
My eyes snapped open.
I was in my room.
In my bed.
My hand was... not empty.
It was full.
Full of sothing that did not belong to .
And that sothing... was attached to Erza.
Yes. Her breast. dragon lon
There was a mont.
Two eternal seconds where the universe paused.
My soul left my body, filed a complaint, and considered early reincarnation.
Erza blinked.
I blinked.
Internal screaming comnced.
Then—
"YOU ABSOLUTE MORTAL FOOL—!!"
"WAIT!! I CAN EXPLAIN! I SWEAR
I THOUGHT IT WAS A LON! I WAS DREAMING—!!"
Her aura flared. Furniture rattled. My survival instinct begged to jump out the window.
"PLEASE HAVE RCY! I'M TOO YOUNG TO DIE! HUMANITY NEEDS —!"
Fade to black.
(Probably my funeral music playing faintly in the background.)
Next day at college,
I was slumped over my desk like a tragic ani protagonist, my face buried in my arms, radiating sha like a space heater on max.
Enter Sam, my ever-so-sympathetic best friend, who slid into his seat with the grace of a man who lives for other people's suffering.
He leaned closer, inspected my cheek, and whistled. "Bro, what happened? You look like a tomato that just found out it's adopted."
I groaned. "It's nothing. We had a fight. She slapped ."
Sam lit up like I just told him Santa was real and dating a supermodel. "Dude... that's the dream! A hot wife who slaps you when you ss up? That's peak romance! Pain with passion! A beautiful, abusive blessing!"
I stared at him. "What kind of rom-coms are you watching?"
Inner :Dream my ass. I accidentally grabbed her dragon lons in my sleep. That wasn't a slap, it was a divine judgnt. I swear my ancestors felt that hit.
My cheek still throbbed from Erza's righteous fury.
Sam kicked back in his chair. "Anyway, did you notice sothing off today?"
I blinked. "Other than my face being rearranged? No."
He pointed subtly at the front-row seat. "Fiona's not here."
I looked. He was right.
No books. No sarcasm. No snarky one-liner like, 'Wow, Yuuta, your face finally matches your marriage choices.'
Nothing.
And that... was weird.
"Fiona doesn't skip," I muttered. "She's punctual. Like, 'show up ten minutes early and glare at people who don't' punctual."
Sam nodded, suddenly serious. "Sothing's off."
Yesterday flashed back in my mind—Fiona, trembling, eyes red, running off like I'd grown a second head.
"Wait..." I whispered, ice dropping into my gut. "Did Erza... do sothing?"
No way it make sense now, why she afraid yesterday that's explain why she ran away from .
"Looks like I'll have to go see Fiona by myself," I said, lifting my head
Sam, lounging on my beanbag like it owed him rent, raised an eyebrow. "Dude. Take protection."
I paused. "Protection? What are we doing, fighting goblins? She's Fiona, not a cursed sword."
He raised an eyebrow. "Are you dumb or just pretending?
Ohhh you an that I said.
Sam smirked. "Bro. She used to be your crush. You're going to her place alone. Who knows? She might still like you. One thing leads to another, next thing you know, boom—scandal."
I scoffed. "You do realize I'm married, right? Like, legally, spiritually, magically—possibly cosmically married. And Fiona's just a friend."
Inner : LIES. PANIC. ABORT MISSION.
My face twitched.
No way. I can't cheat. That would be suicide—literal end-of-humanity-level stuff.
Last Easter, Fiona gave a sweet little chocolate egg. Harmless, right?
Wrong.
Erza saw it. Thought it was so kind of affair offering. She beat like I'd just signed a peace treaty with her enemies.
If she even suspects I'm cheating, forget death. We're talking extinction-level apocalypse.
Sam squinted at . "You good, man? You're staring into space like you're solving quantum physics."
I blinked. "Nothing. Just... have you noticed Fiona's been acting kinda weird lately?"
Sam nodded. "Yeah, ever since you dropped the 'I'm married' bomb, she's been off. I an, I was shocked too, but in Fiona's case... I think she was expecting a ring, not an Erza."
That guilt hit right in the conscience.
She really was hoping for more... and I blindsided her with a secret wife from another world.
"I'll apologize," I said softly. "I'll go talk to her today."
Even if the conversation goes badly...
Hope so Fiona will understand.!
To be continue...
[End of Chapter]
Extra scence for loyal reader
Elena: (sniffling)
"Papa... the other novels are getting Power Stones and Collections... I want so too..."
Yuuta: (patting her head awkwardly)
"Elena, it's not sothing we can just take. It depends on the readers..."
Elena: (eyes sparkling, tail wagging)
"But they like , right? They'll do it! They'll click the Collection button! They'll throw Power Stones like confetti!"
Yuuta: (turns to you with the deadpan face of a man who knows fear)
"Dear readers... please. I'm begging you. Add us to your Collection. Throw a Power Stone our way. I don't want to explain to Erza why our daughter's crying again."
Erza: (pokes her head in from the kitchen)
"Did soone say crying? Who made my child sad?"
Yuuta: "N-no one! Just the algorithm, my Queen! Just the cruel, cruel algorithm!"
Elena: (holding a sign with sparkles and baby dragon scribbles)
"Vote now! Or I'll huff and I'll puff... and maybe cry again!"
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