Ti passed relentlessly without clearly perceiving how each day went by.
I had been eagerly waiting for the weekend to co. As soon as I woke up on the weekend, I dressed neatly.
Since the Duke Geyrus family had agreed to send a carriage, I left my room to wait for the carriage to arrive.
Passing through the quiet dormitory corridor on the weekend, I stepped outside and cald my mind while breathing in the early morning air.
“…Felix.”
As I was walking down the empty street, I was startled by a low voice coming from the quiet street and turned my gaze towards it.
I thought there would be no one, but only then did I notice Helena hiding in the shadow of the building.
“Helena…?”
I had a lot to think about for the past few days, and since our schedules didn’t match, I hadn’t had ti to et Helena, so it had been a very long ti since I’d seen her face.
It had only been a few days, but since we had been sticking together almost every day, I felt a surge of happiness at seeing her after just a few days apart.
“It’s been a while. What brings you out so early in the morning?”
“…I heard you’re going to the Duke’s residence today?”
When I spoke with a welcoming heart, Helena asked in a low voice, unlike her usual self, and did not respond to my greeting.
Feeling sothing strange, I looked at Helena and only then did her appearance register.
Helena had dark circles under her eyes and looked a bit thin, as if she hadn’t been eating well.
Blinking blankly at Helena’s sowhat strange appearance, I belatedly ca to my senses and answered her question.
“Yes. How did you know?”
Being unable to et Helena often these days ant I didn’t have ti to tell her about the Duke Geyrus family.
Since Sylvia and Pala didn’t know about it either, I tilted my head slightly and asked her.
Although my tone and expression were the sa as usual, Helena frowned as she looked at .
“…Don’t you have anything to tell ?”
“Huh? What?”
Unable to understand Helena’s words, I asked back, and she frowned again and let out a small sigh.
Seeing her seemingly uncomfortable, I swallowed dryly and racked my brains.
“…Ah, thank you for bringing snacks the other day. It helped clear my head a bit.”
As I was trying to find sothing to say to Helena, I belatedly rembered and awkwardly smiled, thanking her.
But even after I expressed my gratitude, she continued to look at with cold eyes. It was very unfamiliar to see such a look from Helena. If it had been soone else, it might have been different.
That’s why I thought I might have done sothing wrong.
“Is that not it?”
Helena was silent for a long ti. I scratched my head with an awkward smile.
Since I had left my room a little earlier than the ti the Duke’s family was supposed to send the carriage, I had enough ti to talk with Helena.
“Did I do sothing wrong perhaps?”
“…Sothing wrong?”
Helena finally opened her mouth at my question. But her tone was so cold and icy that I involuntarily flinched.
“Yes, I was wondering if I had done sothing wrong.”
However, I tried my best not to show it and asked calmly. Sohow, Helena’s behavior, different from usual, felt unfamiliar.
Even in Felix’s mories, it was hard to find Helena like this. It could be said that she had never treated him like this before.
At my question, Helena’s eyebrows twitched slightly.
At the sa ti, she let out a small, deep breath and slowly asked in a trembling voice.
When asking, Helena’s voice was no longer cold and icy.
She sounded afraid.
“You… Are you really Felix…?”
“What do you an by that?”
I blinked and asked her back. Helena bit her lower lip hard at my nonchalant question and asked again.
“Shin-woo Lee, who is that?”
And at that mont, my heart sank.
***
I had taken Felix’s body.
That was an undeniable, clear fact. As long as I thought of myself as Shin-woo Lee, I couldn’t deny it even if soone asked .
I thought I should tell Helena about this for a while.
Helena likes Felix. I took Felix’s body.
She still likes Felix. Although I hadn’t taken her kindness for granted, I knew that receiving her kindness without telling her that I wasn’t Felix was deceiving her.
But I couldn’t because I was afraid of her reaction when she found out.
Yes, I had been thinking in my heart.
That I was too afraid of receiving Helena’s cold, contemptuous gaze.
That’s why when the na Shin-woo Lee ca out of Helena’s mouth, I felt my heart sink.
“How… no, why… do you…”
“How do I know that na?”
Helena looked at with cold eyes. However, her eyes were shaking strongly within.
As much as I was feeling fear, Helena was also feeling fear. She was afraid of the existence of ‘’ dwelling in Felix’s body.
“I saw your notebook.”
“…I see.”
I could only say that I had been careless. I should have hidden the notebook, thinking soone might see it, or I shouldn’t have written anything down.
No, before that, I should have told Helena earlier. To prevent her from suddenly knowing this fact, I should have kept my distance… or told her the truth.
But my selfish attitude of not doing so for the sake of my own comfort was now coming back as a cold dagger.
I nodded with a dejected smile.
“‘I see’ is not enough. Who are you? Are you really… Felix?”
I wanted to run away.
I wanted to escape this suffocating atmosphere. But there was nowhere to run, and I shouldn’t run away.
“I am…”
My throat was choked up.
I tried to utter a few words, but my breath was stuck… my throat was clogged, and I couldn’t speak properly.
But I had to.
I looked into Helena’s eyes with difficulty and continued speaking.
“I am Shin-woo Lee.”
“What…!!”
Helena, who heard my words, shouted spasmodically, then looked at while suppressing her anger.
She had so much to say, but her face showed she didn’t know what to say first because there was too much. After staring at for a long ti, trying to calm her anger, Helena struggled to open her mouth after choosing her words carefully.
“Where is Felix? Where did the original Felix go if you entered Felix’s body?”
“…I don’t know that either.”
“If you don’t know, who would?”
Helena’s question was reasonable in a way.
But it was also true that I couldn’t answer her questions about who brought here, why they did it, and where the original Felix went.
Even I didn’t know. Feeling like a sinner, I bowed my head deeply and shook it.
“I really don’t know.”
“…Is he at least alive?”
Helena’s voice was tinged with a slight wetness.
If it were others, it might not matter, but in front of Helena and Felix’s family, I couldn’t help but be a sinner.
This ti, biting my lower lip, I shook my head with difficulty.
“…I don’t know.”
I inherited Felix’s mories. But that wasn’t proof that he was alive.
I’m not sure if the soul actually exists.
Ultimately, I dwelled in this body, and even I couldn’t know whether the original Felix had disappeared or had been assimilated into .
“What in the world do I have to ask for a proper answer?”
“…I’m sorry.”
I could only apologize.
I bowed my head even deeper and apologized at Helena’s sharp words.
Bowing my head was partly because I was sorry to her, but also because I didn’t dare to see her expression. Helena remained silent for a while after my apology.
When I cautiously raised my head with courage, Helena stood, dropping tears drop by drop.
Without even thinking of wiping away her tears, Helena’s gaze, looking at while tears stread down her face, was filled with complex emotions.
I couldn’t reach out my hand, nor could I not reach out, so I could only stare at her blankly in an awkward posture.
“I’m really sorry.”
I could feel my voice trembling. The clear hostility I felt from Helena’s gaze was like a sharp pain in my heart.
“You should have…”
“…”
“You should have told . That you’re not Felix. That you’re soone else.”
Helena wiped her tears with the back of her hand and spoke forcefully. Even if I had a hundred mouths, I had nothing to say, so I could only bite my lip and nod, agreeing with her words.
“You,”
“…”
“You played with .”
“That’s not…!”
I wanted to say it wasn’t like that.
But as if she didn’t want to hear my answer, Helena turned around quickly and started walking away.
I couldn’t stop Helena from leaving, so I could only stand there blankly, watching her departing figure.
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