I Only Want to Lie Flat But Am Forced to Cultivate Immortality Chapter 24 - 14 Through the Door of Misfortune2

"I've never seen anyone get scamd so badly!"

Xu Qing casually replied, "Really? I just hosted Landlord Liu's funeral a few days ago and didn't hear anything about it. Who told you?"

"Old Hu from the coffin shop said it. He's got no children and spends his days hitting on older won. I guess he wants soone to keep him company when he dies. You should've seen the coffin he prepared for himself. It's so wide, you could fit three people in it!"

"That's not what I ant. I'm asking how was the affair between Landlord Liu's wife and the steward discovered by others?"

"Oh, that. I heard that one of Landlord Liu's concubines went to the Governnt Office to lodge a complaint. Not sure about the specifics, but when the constables arrived at the Liu Mansion, they stripped the steward and Young Master Liu right in front of everyone. Guess what?"

I'm just a kid, and you want to guess!

Xu Qing smiled and said, "I guess they both have identical birthmarks on their buttocks. And those birthmarks form twin peach blossoms!"

"..."

Wu Yaohua, who was enthusiastically retelling the story, seed like a rooster being choked. It made him unbearably frustrated!

"You little rascal, you knew about this and still ca to ask ?"

Seeing Wu Yaohua huff and puff, Xu Qing quickly said, "No way. I might've heard it before, but no one tells it as entertainingly as you do. Listening to you feels like I'm in a teahouse, absolutely delightful!"

Wu Yaohua's face eased a bit. The two continued chatting, and soon Xu Qing understood the whole story behind the incident.

The saying goes, good news never leaves the house, but bad news travels a thousand miles.

Ever since Liu Mansion's concubine Su Hongxiu lodged her complaint at the Governnt Office, the constables stord the Liu Mansion like bandits and imdiately stripped the steward Song Cai and Young Master Liu.

After confirming the identical birthmarks, constable Zhao Zhonghe drew his Guanzhong Treasure Saber, which was three feet long and a hand wide, intending to cut their fingers and perform a blood test for kinship.

Young Master Liu thought he was about to be executed on the spot and shouted in fear, "Father! My real father!"

With his booming voice, Zhao Zhonghe roared, "Who is your real father? Speak clearly!"

Young Master Liu tremblingly pointed at Song Cai, "He, he is my real father!"

The steward Song Cai sighed deeply and slumped to the ground.

Zhao Zhonghe didn't care about this. He took them both to the Arresting Room for further investigation. As they were leaving the Liu Mansion, the family matriarch tried to intercept them with silver notes, attempting to clarify if she was Young Master Liu's real mother.

She was taken along too.

After an overnight interrogation, a scandalous murder case that shocked Linhe District surfaced.

The ancient saying goes, passion leads to death, only self-love brings peace.

With this, the murder case of Landlord Liu being poisoned in the hot springs was fully solved.

"What happened to Liu Mansion now?" Xu Qing was curious. If all the heads of the Liu family were taken away, wouldn't Su Hongxiu beco the biggest winner?

"You an Liu Mansion? It has long been sealed by the Governnt Office. In the end, all their property would probably fall into governnt hands."

"Sealed? Then the concubine who reported the incident should inherit so property, right?" Xu Qing was genuinely surprised. Could it be that Su Hongxiu was just the mantis wielding the knife, while the Governnt Office beca the final winner?

Wu Yaohua received the offered persimmon cakes and started telling Xu Qing a version he hadn't heard before.

After about a tea's ti, Xu Qing understood why Su Hongxiu didn't end up as the winner.

As Su Hongxiu prepared to take over Liu Mansion's wealth, Song Cai's uncle filed another complaint.

The complaint alleged that during her ti at Liu Mansion, Su Hongxiu had multiple secret etings with outsiders, even sneaked in for intimate encounters, accusing her of adulterous behavior!

Though kinship couldn't be proven, Song Cai's uncle's testimony wasn't admissible in court. But the Governnt Office itself was greedy, eyeing Liu Mansion's vast property!

With the tug-of-war, even though Su Hongxiu wasn't convicted, she and the maid ended up in the Red-Light District, resuming their prior trade.

After all, they had no other skills, and their old trade was most comfortable for them.

After chatting, Xu Qing politely declined Wu Yaohua's invitation for a al, fearing his awkward eating might scare Wu Yaohua.

Leaving the Paper Mache Shop, he soon reached the coffin shop at the street corner.

Gazing at the signboard with black background and red characters reading 'Anle Shou' (Restfulness and Longevity), Xu Qing subconsciously patted his cheeks.

For so reason, whenever he passed the coffin shop, he always felt sleepy, as if the coffins inside were more comfortable than a soft bed.

Entering the shop, he saw two black coffins upfront.

The left coffin bore a couplet, "No one lives a thousand years";

The right coffin's couplet read, "I have immortality here.";

Looking at the horizontal inscription...

Xu Qing raised his head to see a red coffin hanging from the beam, with "Shou Wu Er Jia" inscribed on the bottom.

'Shou' ans 'sell', and also 'coffin'.

aning it's a one-ti deal, no haggling!

As Xu Qing was absorbed in looking, a skinny old man in a shroud ca out from the inner room.

"Young man, here to buy a coffin or place an order?"

Xu Qing pondered for a mont, "I'm here to buy two coffins. They don't have to be of high quality; preferably spacious, warm in winter, cool in sumr, and well-ventilated..."

"..."

Hu Baosong raised an eyebrow and interrupted, "You're quite filial, but buying a coffin isn't procured like that."

As they chatted, Hu Baosong moved to a coffin near the shop entrance, caressing its side panel. He was about to explain the intricacies when he noticed sothing rolling inside the shop.

"Where did that copper coin co from?" The old man rubbed his blurry eyes to check if he was seeing things.

Xu Qing turned upon hearing and saw a copper coin rolling from the alley opposite, heading straight towards the coffin shop entrance!

Strangely, the coin looked familiar. Wasn't it the copper coin he discarded earlier?

Having been thrown away, the copper coin wandered through alleys, eventually finding the mother coin. Like a tadpole finding its mother, it hurriedly rolled before Xu Qing, jingling with a clear sound, and finally settled at his feet.

Seeing Xu Qing pick up the coin, Hu Baosong first frowned, then his expression changed drastically.

"Quick, throw away that coin! It's dirty if it ca here by itself. It might be ghost money used for buying life!"

Hu Baosong had just finished speaking when another copper coin rolled from the alley across the street, stopping at the sa spot as its first counterpart.

"Damn it! Do you even know what place you're at? I've eaten air for ghosts and pissed air for them since I was young. I have forty-two ghost thighs boiling in a pot right now! You wanna ask for directions or buy a life? Think about your weight!"

Hu Baosong would dare to confront ghosts. Seeing the unclear coin's arrival, he swiftly snatched up the coin on the ground and the one in Xu Qing's hand. He threw them out with all his might, cursing nonsensically the whole ti.

"Don't be scared, young man! In our trade, we've seen it all. Ghosts fear filthy language, as long as we curse harshly, they won't dare harm us!"

"..."

Xu Qing watched the coins that were thrown out, speechless.

Would they return by the sa route again?

If so, Xu Qing dared not linger, fearing repeated returns might disturb Old Hu's sleep for nights on end.

This kind of mischief can't be done!

After chatting with Hu Baosong, finalizing the delivery dates, Xu Qing hurriedly left the coffin shop.

Although he didn't see the spacious coffin prepared by Old Hu, he ordered two large coffins for stock and verified the copper coin curse's effect.

All in all, it was worth the visit!