I Have Become The Heroes’ Rival Chapter 95

"Are you talking about yourself right now?"

As far as I knew, no one in the world was as harmless as Felix. At least that was until he got entangled with the devil. Naturally, it was in the devil's nature, and what's done is done, so I wouldn’t hold too much resentnt. But wasn’t it a bit unreasonable for him to try to stop from doing sothing?

In the past, the devil himself admitted that he had no such thing as a conscience. I let out a laugh in disbelief. This must be what they ant when they said your astonishnt could send you soaring into the sky. The devil opened his mouth and spoke in a much lower and sombre tone than before.

"I'm not joking. He’s really dangerous."

"Must be false danger then. Regardless, I’m willing to take the risk.”

“It’s beyond what you can withstand!”

"No matter what, it’s still better than burning in hellfire! Besides, you need to understand that you have no right to speak about this."

I wonder if he had sold his conscience. The devil’s ‘fragnt’ was indeed in a very unstable state.

‘As expected from a devil.’

It was ti to help Leraze clean up his act, it would be troubleso. So instead of blurting out harsh words, I decided to explain them kindly. Larry seed capable of understanding, at least as much as his regret would allow.

"Larry, it's ti for us to take responsibility for our actions.”

I spoke softly and tenderly as if explaining sothing to a child, keeping my tone as even as possible.

"I failed to hold onto Felix, who left in a panic. I ultimately provided him the opportunity to beco even more corrupt. No matter how much pain Felix causes , I have to endure it. I will embrace it all."

"Why would you..."

"Because I love him."

“...”

"You took away the Felix I loved completely. So, whether he causes pain or pleasure, I must endure it and be patient."

"Why, why..."

"Because you love ."

Now I needed a response.

"Are you ready to take responsibility?"

As I said that, I pointed back towards the bed. His deep blue eyes, which had grown heavy with emotion, trembled helplessly as if they would collapse at any mont. His repeated clenching and unclenching of his fists made it clear that his desire to snatch away was not just an idle remark.

It was as if he was recalling my words of showing him pain worse than death if he did such a thing. Eventually, he loosened his grip and let his arms drop limply. He staggered towards the bed and collapsed onto it. Then, with his head buried in a pillow, he muttered in a barely audible voice.

"I feel like I'm in Hell."

Hell was the ho of devils. I asked him out of courtesy because his words implied that he felt like he was back ho.

"How do you feel?"

"Awfully miserable."

Despite having once longed to return, Larry now lay hidden beneath the blanket, his large fra curled up tightly like a shrimp, feeling completely wretched.

・・・・・

When I unexpectedly ran into Felix at the banquet hall, I was so caught off guard that I just stamred and let him go without taking any aningful action. But now it was different. Not only did I know exactly when, where, and how we would et, but I could even set it up myself.

‘Fel, I’ve missed you so much.’

I considered whether I should tear up while saying that. If the atmosphere beca too serious, he might get overwheld and run away again, like last ti. Maybe it would be better to do sothing a bit silly to lighten the mood and make him laugh.

‘O Hero, Awaken!’

Would this amount of nonsense do the trick?

But since his emotions have vanished, would he even smile upon hearing those words?

‘M-my heart feels like it’s about to burst!’

With each passing second and minute, my mouth grew drier. If this kept up, I'd squander all the favourable scenarios and revert to a ‘stuttering’ ss! Realising one's own emotions was proving to be such a challenge. In the past, I wouldn't have bothered with such needless concerns.

I paced back and forth like a restless puppy. Desperate to calm my nerves, I downed a glass of wine in one shot! Boo-hoo, at this rate I was going to fall into alcohol addiction. I should get used to it as soon as possible since I didn’t know how long I could borrow the strength of alcohol to talk to Felix.

Moreover, ever since I beca Irene, nothing but sweet cocktails suited my taste. I wrinkled my nose in disgust, saying “Ew,” before setting the glass down.

"Why does this taste so awful?"

I bought the most expensive one, but just because it was expensive didn’t an it was good. I'd rather have the cheap and sickeningly sweet one instead. As I stuck out my tongue, grimacing at the bitter and sour taste, I turned my head and found myself staring right into Felix's eyes.

“...”

“...”

Since when had he been awake? Or rather, how long had he been watching my embarrassing behaviour? Desperate to escape this awkward atmosphere, I retracted my tongue and blurted out whatever ca to mind.

"S-shall we continue?”

…What were we supposed to continue?

Having said it myself and imdiately regretting it, I buried my face in my hands and slumped down into my seat. Idiot. I'm such a fool.

"You haven't run away yet."

“I thought it was a dream,” Felix mumbled expressionlessly, blinking his eyes. Water droplets trickled down from the corners of his eyes, running down his cheeks, and he curiously brushed them away with his fingers.

"...Tears?"

And then he asked .

"Did the devil cry?"

His reaction suggested that a crying devil was sothing he had never encountered before. Seeing Felix like that made feel odd since it was as if I made him cry. Flustered, my eyes darted around before I stuttered in response.

“Umm... I suppose I made him cry.”

"Why?"

"The devil assimilated with Fel’s feelings and said he fell in love with , but I harshly rejected him?”

"Ah, ahaha… Love..."

Felix let out a hollow laugh as if it was amusing. However, there was no trace of a smile on his face.

"After stripping of every emotion except love, it’s even stolen that from .”

He spoke in a flat, indifferent voice and then languidly leaned against the headboard of the bed. His jet-black hair flowed gently over his face, casting a shadow over his eyes.

"Why did you refuse? Since it took my emotions, it should be rather similar to the old . It would be less dangerous than ."

There was neither resentnt nor sarcasm. Felix was genuinely saying that. He was asking why I cruelly rejected the devil and chose him instead. The soft smile that had adorned my lips since Felix woke up crumbled. But I quickly composed myself before he noticed. I stood up from my seat and approached Felix. Then, leaning forward with my back bent, I gently cupped one of his cheeks and responded.

"How could that be? While there might be so overlaps since he took the emotions that originally belonged to Fel, that’s the devil, not Felix.”

In fact, even though they occupied the sa body, I could instantly tell Felix apart from the devil before either of them even spoke. It was hard to express it in words, but the two were fundantally different. I gently traced the corners of Felix’s reddened eyes with my fingers and asked.

"Are you sad?"

"I’ve forgotten what it ans to be sad. I’m just plagued by a terrible sense of loss as if sothing is constantly seeping out of .”

"Does it hurt?"

"No. I'm afraid. I'm afraid that I might beco an empty shell, with nothing left inside."

At least it seed that fear still lingered within him. If that’s the case, it’s not too late. As long as there was fear, he would never beco just an empty shell. If he truly had no emotions, he wouldn’t even be able to feel a sense of loss.

"Fel, look at this."

I rummaged through my pocket and abruptly pressed a small vial into his hand. The potion inside was as transparent as the tears of an angel and sparkled with different colours depending on the angle. I had almost given up after repeated failures, but thanks to my unyielding tenacity, I finally succeeded in creating this potion. Though, for now, I had only managed to produce a very small amount.

"What is this?"

Felix examined the potion I had handed him.

"...I’ve never seen this kind of potion before but it’s exceptionally made. Have you been learning about potions continuously since then?”

"Yes!"

"I see."

"Aren't you going to praise ?"

“Do I need to?”

He looked up at with a slightly perplexed expression. I bit my lip and glanced up at the ceiling for a mont, trying to hold back my tears. Once I managed to keep them in check, I smiled broadly and nodded enthusiastically.

"Please tell I did well."

He stared at intently for a mont, then slowly began to move his lips.

"...You did well."

"Hehe."

The bed was spacious. I quickly lay down with my head resting on his outstretched legs.

"Please pat my head."

Felix seed flustered at first, but when I grabbed his hand and placed it on my head, he hesitated for a mont before gently stroking my hair. What started as a light touch gradually beca more intense and lingering. Felix gently scratched my chin and played with my earlobe with a touch filled with raw desire. His fingers relentlessly sought out my sensitive spots, tickling and pressing them.

"Mmm..."

I let out a soft moan and buried my head in his thigh.

"You've beco reckless."

"I've beco honest.”

"Did you bring the ointnt?"

"No..."

"You’re truly reckless. You must have intended to get hurt."

"I have healing potions though."

“Wouldn’t that be enough?” I inquired with my eyes half-closed as I felt his touch. Felix’s hand delved inside my dress without hesitation.

"It will hurt."

"It doesn't matter."

"I won't let you go even if you cry."

"I’d still be happier than crying alone."

Felix tugged at the shirt he was wearing and swiftly tore off the buttons that were barely fastened. His once pure white and clear skin had darkened from sun exposure. He raised his other hand but paused briefly as he gazed at the potion in his grasp.

"What kind of potion is this?"

"When you drink it, the mory and feelings of your happiest mont will co to mind."

At that mont, the bright blue eyes that had been gleaming with intense desire montarily flickered with uncertainty.

"But the effects won't last long."

Nevertheless, if that feeling accumulated, wouldn’t he eventually be able to regain the many things that he had lost soday?

In truth, I created that out of necessity. I missed Felix so much that I couldn’t bear it. I wanted to vividly recall even the faded mories, but I no longer needed it now.

"You said you were afraid of becoming an empty shell. If you ever feel like you have nothing left, co to . I’ll do whatever it takes to fill you up until you feel complete.”

“...”

"In fact, the na of this potion was decided from the beginning. Felix."

I grabbed the vial from Felix's hand, opened it, and poured the entire contents into my mouth. With a playful smile, I tapped my moist lips with my fingers.

"I have a pretty good idea of what I’ll see even without drinking it…”

Felix gazed upon , seemingly spellbound, before slowly pressing his lips against mine, drawing out the happiness from my mouth. The potion that Felix hadn't managed to swallow in ti trickled down my throat.