I Died and Became a Hollow, But I Get Stronger by Being an Idiot Chapter 2: War Against the Cactus

So there I was.

A fresh, dumb Hollow with a bone mask, standing in the middle of Hueco Mundo's never-ending white desert, having just licked a rock and yelled at a boulder.

And I wasn't even close to done.

Current EP: 235 / 10,000.

I needed to pick up the pace.

That's when I saw it.

Off in the distance, standing tall and smug, was a cactus.

Okay — not really a cactus.

More like a weird spiny plant sticking out of the sand, probably dead for a hundred years. But in my eyes, it was a worthy opponent. The king of this particular patch of sand.

I pointed dramatically.

"You and , green boy!"

[SYSTEM NOTICE: Challenging a plant to single combat — 100 EP]

Current EP: 335 / 10,000

Alright, cactus. Let's dance.

I sprinted toward it, roaring like a maniac. A few nearby Hollows watched, heads tilting in confusion.

One of them started gnawing on his own hand. I made a ntal note to avoid him.

As I neared my target, I leapt into the air — or at least, what counted as a leap for a clumsy rookie Hollow — and perford a wildly ungraceful sorsault midair.

[SYSTEM NOTICE: Attempted an acrobatic attack without knowing how to flip — 150 EP]

Current EP: 485 / 10,000

I landed shoulder-first into the cactus.

Needles went everywhere.

It hurt like hell.

"GRUOOOHHH!!"

(Worth it!)

I staggered back, half my mask dented, needles sticking out of my shoulder.

[SYSTEM NOTICE: Headbutted a cactus — 200 EP]

Current EP: 685 / 10,000

The plant fell over with a soft plop.

Victory.

I raised my arms in triumph as the other Hollows gave confused, half-hearted howls in my direction.

I was making a na for myself.

A na nobody would rember because they didn't speak human words, but it counted.

I decided to take a victory lap, running in circles around the fallen cactus.

[SYSTEM NOTICE: Celebrating like an idiot — 50 EP]

Current EP: 735 / 10,000

"GRUOHOOOH!"

(Yeah baby! Who's the king now?!)

Then I tripped again, faceplanting into a sand dune.

[SYSTEM NOTICE: Faceplanted for codic effect — 75 EP]

Current EP: 810 / 10,000

I lay there a mont, half-buried in the sand, thinking about life.

And by life, I an what dumb thing I could do next.

Then I had it.

An idea so monuntally stupid it might just work.

I would build a sand sculpture.

Of myself.

And challenge it to a fight.

Hueco Mundo wasn't ready for this level of brainless ambition.

"GRUOH!"

(Let's do this!)

And with that, I started scooping sand into a vaguely Hollow-shaped pile, humming a tune I made up on the spot.

[SYSTEM NOTICE: Declared war on your own sand statue — 150 EP]

Current EP: 960 / 10,000

Almost a thousand.

I was getting there.

The other Hollows were still watching.

One had fallen over. Another was trying to eat the fallen cactus.

A third was spinning in circles for no reason.

Ah. I was starting a trend.

Hueco Mundo's first Stupidity Movent.

Kenta, the idiot revolutionary.

[EP: 960 / 10,000]