63 Ortaire (5)
[Adilun's POV]
To be honest, I could have created a magic barrier to block the rain, but I intentionally chose not to.
I just simply enjoyed spending ti with him.
I leaned on him... because I liked the ti when he embraced tightly.
Our bodies were touching each other, but my heart was still reaching for him, and it saddened that our hearts couldnt reach each other.
Even so, the fact that our bodies were touching gave hope that soday our hearts would also touch each other.
Despite this, I hold onto the hope that one day our hearts would et, just as our bodies were touching right now.
Perhaps, the thought that he might also have feelings for , to so extent was also swirling inside .
Otherwise, he wouldn't have treated so kindly.
Even when I caught a cold, or when I shed my scales... He had always made his first priority ever since the day he apologized to .
'If so, can I have hope? If I confess to him soday, wouldnt he answer my heart?'
In fact, even my actions right now clearly showed that I have feelings for him. What woman in the world would embrace a man she didn't like? Especially in this manner, whenever the opportunity arose.
He wasn't soone who was unaware...nor was he stupid. Maybe he knew my feelings too.
That was why I had to be even more cautious. I was afraid that if I confessed too hastily, even this relationship that was gradually getting closer would fall apart.
He referred to himself as a coward in my dream. Maybe... it unveiled my own true nature. I was a coward as well. I was afraid of rejection, so I couldn't gather the courage to speak up. I was that kind of coward.
The possibility that I might not be able to embrace him like this put up a thin wall in front of .
But...I couldn't break through that thin wall. I was afraid that the warmth of his embrace, the tenderness he showed , and the sweet dreams I had made would all disappear.
So I couldn't take even one step forward.
For the first ti in my life, I had a desire for sothing. Even though I had never felt that way before...I couldn't act properly like a fool.
If I were to approach him more aggressively, would he accept ? It was uncertain.
However, I could only hope... That he liked too... He was hesitant because he was also afraid that our relationship would beco awkward
If so, it would be nice if this relationship could be maintained.
The thin wall that separated us would eventually wear away with the passage of ti and beyond that wall, we would be able to face each other and laugh together.
But maybe it was an impossible dream.
Such thoughts transford the excitent in my heart into a sharp ache. I couldn't predict if another captivating person might appear and whisk him away from .
I had always emphasized the importance of respect and being seen for who I truly am. I tested him with these convictions.
And those tests... were now testing in reverse.
'Have I ever respected him?'
'Have I genuinely acknowledged his current state?'
The answer was no. I had just accepted the kindness he showed . I had exploited his guilt and his desire to assist .
As soon as I realized that fact, I felt a chill run down my spine involuntarily.
What was different about now compared to the way I used to be?
Was this just playing with his heart?
I only ever said thank you to him, but I never did anything that he would truly appreciate.
The one-year period I talked about before...
Now, with less than eight months left, that ti and the words I said to put all of our debts to each other behind us and start anew... It applied to too.
Would he really like the woman who only took his dedication for granted and just threw a single word of thanks to him?
'Will the thin wall that I cannot overco crumble over ti?'
After thinking deeply while in his arms, I concluded that it was not going to crumble on its own.
It was sothing that I had to work hard for. Hoping that the wall would crumble on its own was, in the end, tantamount to doing nothing.
Therefore... I had to approach him. I had to do sothing for him too. For the eight months of mutual confidence, I had to dedicate my heart to him.
If we continued this relationship of dedication to each other, the debt between us would eventually disappear, and trust in each other would grow in the empty space, and that trust would bloom into a flower called love.
'Lets not wait, Adilun.'
'I have to go to him directly. That's the only way I can tell him that I like him.'
As I was lost in such thoughts, Physis ran faster and got us out of the area where it was raining.
The soft sunlight was dazzling.
"Fortunately, it's not raining here. Thank goodness.
He said to with his wet hair.
"Yes. That's right."
Im sorry. I never thought it would be like this.
"It's okay. It was beautiful. Especially...I've never seen a scene where it rains in an area where the sun is shining. Wet clothes will dry. But...I don't want to dry off right now. Anyway, please let down now."
I smiled brightly at him as I got out of his arms. So that he could feel relieved when he looked at .
"Is that so?"
"Yes. It's a new experience for too."
"...Yes. I see."
Physis.
"Yes?"
"When you were running with in your arms, I thought about it carefully."
"What did you think about?"
I thought I might be a really an person to you.
What do you an?
The promise we made for a year During that ti, I told you to devote yourself to . But...
Yes...
But is that right? Maybe I am using the guilt in your heart to satisfy my own self-interest?
No. Absolutely not. Its sothing I like to do. I did not move for you out of a simple sense of guilt.
"Then... ...Can you tell why?"
"Initially, it was a sense of guilt. It felt like my insults had obscured your light. So, I wanted to restore that light. But as I spent ti with you... I realized sothing."
"What?"
"That you are already a shining person. That's why I made a vow to myself. To see how far you can reach."
"I shine?"
"Yes."
"No, I'm just a cowardly woman who only takes advantage of you?"
If you just taking advantage, would Princess Isla want to be friends with you? At the social gathering, though it was a minority, didn't so of the princesses admire you? You haven't reached your full potential yet. Because of ."
hmm.
Was this how he saw ?
It was funny. I had never thought of myself as a remarkable person, but he oddly saw as soone special.
The fact made so happy.
Eventually, I took out one of the bricks from the thin wall.
You know. I have sothing I want to tell you honestly.
"...Yes."
I want to be with you all the ti.
"Is that...a confession?"
I shook my head. No, this wasn't a confession. Just.... ...a vow to myself.
Its not a confession, its a promise.
What promise?
Im determined to find out a little more about you. So I wont say that I like you yet. Have I told you before that I need to be sure about you?
Yes.
"That applies to too. I need to be certain about myself. To find the answer if I am qualified to stand by your side. And when I find that answer, I will gain the confidence to be with you."
"I see."
"Yes, so for now, I won't say that I like you. But..."
But?
"I will stamp it, at least once."
He looked at with a puzzled expression as if he heard an abrupt comnt. Well, saying sothing about stamping was sudden. It must have sounded like nonsense.
Rather than giving an explanation, I went straight into action.
Like a dream I had a long ti ago, instead of grabbing him by the collar, I pulled Physis' neck towards and kissed him on the lips.
I thought about sticking my tongue out, but I didn't. For now, it was just a stamp.
Later, when he and I had confidence in each other, we would finally send upright affection toward each other.
Then it wouldn't just end with a stamp.
After an eternity-like mont passed, I released my arms around his neck.
He looked stunned.
"Oh, Adilun?"
I looked at him as if nothing had happened and playfully smiled. The montary ecstasy signaled regret in my mind, but I tried to control it, hoping that this fleeting ecstasy would beco a happiness that perates life in the future.
'Yes. Right now, just this much.'
"Yes?"
This
"This is... a stamp. It's a stamp to prevent other princesses from flirting. I will restrict every woman who approaches you from now on and burn all the letters they send."
A stamp... I see. Are you telling not to look elsewhere?
"Yes. To keep your heart from wandering elsewhere. I won't do that when I have confidence in myself. "
The reason May I ask?
"No. Think about it yourself."
I inwardly repeated the reason why I didn't answer him.
'Anyway, when that ti cos... you won't even notice any other woman besides . Cause you cant help but love .'
Therefore The reason was a secret.
'Ill tell you later, Physis.'
At that mont, I smiled like a desired fox more than anyone else.
--- End OF The Chapter ---
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