Inside the academy, I sat across from the protagonist, Han Si-Hoo, in a small café.
If I had to describe him, he had black hair and was as handso as a protagonist should be.
There was a reason so many heroines followed him around.
[1 hour 45 minutes]
I didn’t have much ti left.
“You showed up with that sa smiling face.”
Han Si-Hoo spoke with a sharp edge to his voice.
He seed angry.
For childhood friends, we didn’t look like we had the best relationship.
“Haha…”
And that’s because we really didn’t.
Yoo Seo-Ah had purposely pushed him away.
She said so pretty harsh things to get rid of him.
She didn’t want to be a burden.
I understand that.
I don’t like asking people for help either.
But now wasn’t the ti to be worrying about that.
I needed money, even if it ant swallowing my pride.
“...Yoo Seo-Ah. You told to get lost, didn’t you?”
“Uh…”
“You said I should never co find you again, didn’t you? So why now?”
“I’m sorry. I was wrong.”
How exactly did Yoo Seo-Ah push him away again?
Oh right, she cursed him out.
She told him to go to the academy and live well without her.
She pushed him away by saying all sorts of things, but it ca from a mix of self-pity and inferiority.
After that big fight, Han Si-Hoo didn’t co looking for her.
And he didn’t reach out to nd things either.
In the novel, that led to Yoo Seo-Ah’s death.
If he had paid more attention to her strange behavior, maybe things would’ve turned out differently.
Maybe she would’ve lived, like I am now, carefully managing her dication.
“That ti... I said so terrible things. I’m really sorry. I just couldn’t control my emotions... Could you forgive ?”
Apologizing for sothing I didn’t even do felt strange.
It almost felt like I was trampling on the part of Yoo Seo-Ah that wanted to hide her worsening condition from the protagonist.
But that didn’t matter.
What mattered more than past mistakes was getting the ds I needed now.
“Please? I was wrong.”
“Hah… Fine. Let’s leave it at that.”
“Wow, you’re forgiving ? Thank you.”
I managed to relax my expression again.
Of course.
He’s the protagonist.
I figured he’d be willing to let it go.
Han Si-Hoo might’ve grown up in a rough environnt, which made him mature for his age, but he’s still just a middle schooler.
He’ll be in high school soon, but he’s still at the age where nding relationships is easier.
“So... what’s with your arm?”
“Huh?”
The bandaged arm.
It was clearly drawing so attention.
“I cut myself.”
I gave him a hollow laugh.
“How?”
“I just... scraped it on the edge of sothing. It’s no big deal, don’t worry about it.”
The bandages were only there to cover the wounds.
After I beat the mirror to a bloody ss, the cuts had gotten worse.
Thanks to the ds, though, it didn’t hurt.
If I had walked around with the skin exposed, it would’ve drawn even more attention.
At least I hadn’t broken any bones or gotten seriously hurt.
It really wasn’t a big deal.
“Okay, so... did you co to the academy just to apologize, or is there sothing else?”
“Haha… well…”
It’s harder to ask for money than I thought.
Even with soone you’re close to.
And a few minutes ago, we weren’t even on good terms.
We’ve only just made up.
Did we even really make up?
I’m banking on Han Si-Hoo being kind enough to understand.
Normally, you wouldn’t ask for money right after apologizing.
If I brought it up now, it’d seem like the only reason I apologized was to borrow money.
It’s not a great look.
But it’s the truth, isn’t it?
I apologized just to borrow money.
What does honor even matter?
Better to lose so pride than to die.
“So, you know the ds I take?”
“Yeah.”
“I’m out of money to buy more. I ca to ask for a loan.”
“What?”
“I’ll pay you back.”
I lowered my head as I asked.
If I were only asking for a small amount, I wouldn’t need to go this far, but the amount I needed was... pretty big.
One pill costs 70,000 won.
A month’s supply of the injectable drug is 3 million won.
At first, the ds cost around 100,000 won, but the price has been going up.
The more people want it, the more expensive it gets.
Yoo Seo-Ah had already spent all the money she’d saved up.
She even sold off what little she had left.
“So, you apologized just for this…”
“I’m sorry.”
“How much do you need?”
“Around 5 million…?”
“What?”
Han Si-Hoo’s eyes widened at the amount.
Was it too much?
“Actually, 4 million? No, 3 million will be enough.”
I should lower the amount.
I still had so pills left, so I just needed enough to buy the solution.
“...Are the ds really that expensive?”
“Yeah. They’ve gotten more expensive since more people are trying to get them.”
“There’s no way. You said it was like a cold at first.”
[1 hour 25 minutes]
As we kept talking, my ti was running out faster.
I needed to get this money.
He’s my childhood friend, after all, right?
He’ll lend it to , right?
“I’ll definitely pay you back... Can’t you lend it to ?”
But could I really repay him?
It’s not impossible to make money, but with this body, it won’t be easy.
To be honest, after taking the ds, I get really lethargic.
I feel drowsy and don’t want to move.
Going outside makes the ds wear off faster too.
Most of my ti is spent sitting quietly in the corner of my room, smiling.
Still, I said I’d pay him back, so I’ll find a way, sohow.
I could only hope that Han Si-Hoo would believe .
“I don’t get it. You’ve never had a problem paying for your ds before.”
“The price has gone up a lot.”
“Right…”
He didn’t seem to believe .
I an, who would believe that the price of a 100,000 won d jumped to several million in just a few months?
Even I wouldn’t believe it.
But when you think about how effective the ds are, it makes sense that they’d be that expensive.
No matter how bad I feel, the ds always make feel better.
Sure, they leave a little spacey, but I can still stay sane.
“Well, the thing is… I’m using different ds now, too.”
Even the injectable ones are more expensive.
“...”
Han Si-Hoo looked at with a hint of disgust.
His gaze was filled with disappointnt.
“I really will pay you back...”
What if he doesn’t lend the money, despite our history as childhood friends?
I might have to resort to borrowing from a loan shark, and that’s going to be a huge hassle.
The world isn’t exactly kind to people like .
Right now, the only person I can rely on is Han Si-Hoo.
“You need 5 million won, right?”
After so hesitation, Han Si-Hoo finally spoke.
“Huh? Yeah.”
Is he really going to lend it to ?
He’s the protagonist, after all.
“I’ve transferred it to your account.”
He fiddled with his phone for a mont before saying that.
I don’t have a phone, so I can’t check, but I trust that he did it.
I guess he already knew Yoo Seo-Ah’s bank details.
“Thanks. I’ll pay you back…”
“I’m not lending it to you.”
“Huh?”
“I’m giving it to you. You don’t have to pay it back.”
“Really?”
Were we that close as childhood friends?
He’s such a protagonist.
I almost started laughing.
“But don’t co looking for again. Let’s not get involved with each other anymore.”
“Huh?”
“Take the money and leave.”
“...”
In that mont, I lost half of the few connections I had left.
What did I do to make him tell to get lost?
If I were in his shoes, I’d probably be just as annoyed with soone like , groveling for money without any intention of paying it back.
Did I really just turn our entire friendship into cash?
This isn’t exactly funny.
This isn’t how I thought things would go.
“Why? Did hearing say it feel different from when you told to get lost?”
“...”
I guess it was a similar situation when Yoo Seo-Ah pushed him away.
It’s just karma.
Even in this situation, he still gave the money, so I guess Han Si-Hoo really is a nice guy.
“Honestly… I’m disappointed in you. I don’t know why you need that much money, but… gambling or whatever... Anyway, let’s not see each other again. I’ll walk you to the entrance.”
With that, Han Si-Hoo stood up.
He really doesn’t believe it’s for ds.
“Hah…”
Despite how serious this all was, I found myself laughing.
Han Si-Hoo looked at with even more pity.
[45 minutes]
The ntal strain must’ve been too much; my ti was running out fast.
I still needed to ask for taxi money.
But it didn’t feel like the right ti to ask for more.
“Could you spare so cash for the ride ho?”
“I can’t withdraw the money you transferred right away... just a little?”
“Could you hail a taxi for ?”
I played out the options in my mind.
No matter what I said, it would seem pathetic.
But I had no choice.
“Hey, Si-Hoo.”
I called out to him as he walked ahead of .
“What?”
“Can you lend so money for the taxi?”
“...Taxi money? How did you get here, then?”
“I walked.”
“Haha, you’re unbelievable. You’ve really gone too far.”
“...”
I understand.
If I were in his position, I wouldn’t lend money either.
It sounds like just another excuse to squeeze out more cash.
“Goodbye. Don’t co looking for again. I an it.”
“Ah…”
With that, I was left standing alone outside the entrance.
I handed back the temporary pass to the guard.
He looked at with a smile, probably assuming everything went well.
I stood there in a daze for a while before reality hit .
“How am I supposed to get ho?”
Do I have to walk?
[31 minutes]
It’s not going to work.
Even if I took public transport, I’d barely make it.
If I took all the pills I had on ...
Still, walking ho would take way longer than I had left.
I thought I’d at least get enough for taxi fare.
Han Si-Hoo was more upset than I expected.
Unfortunately, I didn’t have enough ti to calm him down.
“If I’d known, I would’ve brought the injection with .”
I miscalculated a lot today.
I’ve already used up more ti than I thought.
And now, I’ve got no money for the ride ho.
I can’t borrow money from anyone else either.
It’s not like I know anyone at the academy.
And the friendly guard from earlier is nowhere to be seen.
I’ll just have to go.
Counting my remaining pills, I started walking ho.
At least I’d walked this path once before, so getting back should be easy.
But what if I run out of ti?
I’ve got painkillers.
I brought them just in case sothing like this happened.
They’re pretty valuable, so I didn’t want to use them easily, but I’ve got no choice.
In the end, only one thing matters.
I’ve secured enough ds for the next month.
That fact alone makes all the other bad things seem insignificant.
I’ve got another month to live happily.
Just thinking about it makes smile.
If only I could stay clear-headed like this forever.
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