Xiao Shan's mind was not on these power struggles. The reason he spoke so much with Xie Zhui was because of the ntion of feeling aggrieved. Now that he had expressed his thoughts, he didn't want to dwell on these matters any longer.
Life, after all, was about feeling comfortable.
Xiao Shan looked at Xie Zhui, who seed lost in thought. He waved at him and smiled, "We were summoned to the palace early this morning. Aren't you tired? In our residence, there are no elders, and we are the highest-ranking. No one can tell us what to do. Why don't you join
for a nap?"
Xie Zhui glanced up and then looked away, saying, "I'm not tired. If Your Highness is tired, please rest. I'll wake you when it's ti for lunch."
Xiao Shan asked, "Then what will you do?"
Xie Zhui replied, "...The scenery in the rear garden is quite nice. I'll take a walk." It was obviously an excuse; he just felt that lying down for a nap with Xiao Shan in broad daylight was inappropriate.
Xiao Shan was a hedonist. If he could avoid moving, he wouldn't; if he could lie down, he wouldn't sit; if he could sit, he wouldn't stand.
Since Xie Zhui had reservations and didn't want to join him, Xiao Shan couldn't force him. Everyone has their own way of living. Xie Zhui had never demanded anything of him, so naturally, he wouldn't demand that Xie Zhui be like him.
In a marriage, what was needed was mutual tolerance and understanding. In this regard, Xiao Shan believed he could set a good example.
So he said, "Alright, I'll take a nap. Wake
up when it's ti to eat."
After Xie Zhui left, Xiao Shan lay on the bed and closed his eyes.
He didn't know how much ti had passed, but the usually good sleeper suddenly opened his eyes. Staring at the ceiling beams, he experienced for the first ti what it felt like to be sleepy yet unable to fall asleep.
He tried to lull himself to sleep by counting sheep in his mind. When he lost count, he would start over from the beginning.
So, the more sheep he counted, the more awake he beca.
Eventually, Xiao Shan realized that this thod of falling asleep was not suitable for him, so he gave up.
Giving up on sleep, Xiao Shan's mind involuntarily drifted to thoughts of Xie Zhui.
He hadn't expected Xie Zhui to ask him such a question today. It seed like it was the first ti in many years that soone had asked if he felt aggrieved.
He didn't feel aggrieved, but that didn't an he didn't appreciate soone caring about him. Xie Zhui was the first person to show concern for his feelings. To be honest, he felt a bit unaccustod to it, even a little embarrassed.
Thinking about these things, Xiao Shan buried his head in the blanket, his heart filled with a mix of emotions.
***
Xie Zhui wandered around the rear garden a few tis.
He wasn't soone who appreciated scenery; to him, the bustling capital and the desolate borderlands were no different.
He just didn't know what else to do. He was pondering whether his earlier words to Xiao Shan had crossed a line. Although Xiao Shan had ultimately explained things to him, he wasn't sure if he had hurt Xiao Shan.
In these matters, Xiao Shan was the true victim.
Xie Zhui wasn't one to express his feelings easily, but seeing Xiao Shan co out of the palace with that indifferent smile on his face, as if whatever Consort Lan did or said had nothing to do with him, made him feel compelled to speak.
Or perhaps it was because Consort Lan was his mother, so he couldn't demand anything from her. When this thought crossed his mind, it felt as if several thorns were pricking his heart back and forth.
It didn't hurt much, but it was extrely uncomfortable.
Xie Zhui wasn't soone who liked to dwell on doubts or negativity; otherwise, he wouldn't have beco a decisive general, nor would he have been able to command the soldiers of the northern border.
For the first ti in his life, he was troubled by Xiao Shan's feelings, wondering if he had gone too far.
When Ji An found Xie Zhui and told him it was ti for lunch, he suddenly realized how much ti had passed. Rembering that he had promised to wake Xiao Shan for lunch, Xie Zhui put aside his thoughts and prepared to wake him up.
As for everything else, if Xiao Shan truly felt that he had crossed a line, he would definitely show it.
Xie Zhui assud Xiao Shan was surely asleep because he was always true to his word; if he said he was going to sleep, he would fall asleep without fail. Unexpectedly, this ti was different. When he gently pushed open the door, he imdiately saw Xiao Shan lying there with his eyes open, staring at the ceiling beams.
Hearing the sound, Xiao Shan quickly sat up. Seeing Xie Zhui, he blinked and said nothing.
Xie Zhui was montarily stunned by his reaction. Then he lowered his gaze and said softly, "It's ti for lunch."
"Oh," Xiao Shan scratched his head in surprise, "It's already that ti."
Xie Zhui responded with a nod.
Xiao Shan quickly got out of bed, freshened up, and joined Xie Zhui for lunch.
During the al, neither of them spoke much.
In the middle of their al, Ji An entered with a beaming face, bringing the gatekeeper along, saying there was good news to report.
Xiao Shan asked, "Good news? What good news?" The kind of good news these people understood was different from his own understanding, and he was genuinely wary of the word "good" now.
The gatekeeper, beaming with joy, said, "Reporting to Your Highness, the Emperor has conferred the title of Earl of Ding'an upon Xie Gongzi* from the Xie family. The imperial decree has just been issued. I saw the eunuch from the palace carrying the decree and congratulated him, then went to inquire further. The Xie family will co to report the good news shortly, but I ca first to share the joy with you, Your Highness."
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