The guard who had co forward like a child born out of Rocky and Rambo’s BL fanfiction said nothing leaves his eyes. He was the teacher of Eagles, he was the max level player of Angry Birds.
Everyone heard him and Johnson too.
And at that, Johnson’s reaction was:
"So you said all that about your eyes but..." Johnson clenched his jaw and held the guard’s nape.
"Where the fuck are your Eyes in the first place!? Your face only has a mouth! You are blind, Motherfucker!!"
That’s right.
Johnson took his ti to point out the shortcomings of the guard, mostly because he was stunned just by the guard’s sheer confidence. He was as confident as a man who has erectile dysfunction but swears that viagra was made out of his blood.
The guard’s head shook along with the movents of his nape held by Johnson as if handling a toddler titan.
"Eagles take lessons from you? What else? You are the master at slingshots? People call you a sharpshooter? You can hit anything with your eyes closed? You can see the future? You can see what the dawg is doing? Answer !"
Johnson swung the head of the guard like a dog swings his weiner and the guard opened his mouth:
"How do you know about my achievents, sir? And you are wrong about one of them. I can’t see the future."
"You fucking bragger!"
Johnson banged the head of the guard on the wall to his left and in just one bang...
PUCK!
The head of the guard exploded.
Johnson killed him.
The fallen third testicle of hawkeye died.
THUD!
His headless body fell on the floor and a bloody red patch and flesh remained stuck on the wall like ketchup and french fries on the wall of a fat woman’s house.
My knees felt weak right after that. As now I know, Johnson would not care about anything and began the carnage like a woman driving a car on a busy road.
He cracked his knuckles and focused right on .
"I won’t play gas anymore. Show your face and I will see what to do with you."
My hands tightened around the ankles again and I decided to use what Jack had told to.
But before that, I removed my shirt.
And that’s when my mood turned worse than it already was.
I had lost my abs, my biceps, my chest, my triceps.
I lost everything.
I was a Greek God before but now I am a Persian Janitor who cleans won’s bathrooms and gets thrown out because he only cleans them when the won are using them.
Before, one look at and anyone would have believed I am the Hero King but now, I have beco a man who wears lipstick and participates in an olympic boxing match.
I would have ranted more about my appearance but I didn’t have the luxury for that.
Johnson had blood on his hands and impatience in his eyes, like a forty year old single man who finally saw sothing like a girl walking alone late at night.
Anyway, Johson had the largest spear among the guards and I didn’t want to see what it could do.
That’s why, I had removed my blue shirt and covered it around my face.
I was bare chested but I couldn’t care less about that. Heck, I would get naked if it ant my face would be invisible for the guards. Nothing is more important than life. If I could survive and beco a waiter, then I could turn the tables on my enemies whenever I want.
I covered my face tightly, making sure not even one inch skin was visible. Though, I left my mouth open as I couldn’t stay silent for a long ti.
Finishing the preparation, I held the ankles of the dead body again.
After that, finally, it was ti to use Jack’s idea.
"Johnson, there is no need to show you my face." I said.
"Why?" Johnson asked, pointing the tip of his spear towards .
I summoned strength from all over my body again and...
"Because I have this!"
I yanked the dead body towards Johnson.
My arms cried—like the goat chosen by Jack—due to lifting that much weight but I succeeded and now the dead body was just in front of Johnson.
However... sothing seems wrong.
Johnson stared at the body and then he stared at .
Then after a confused silence...
"... Was that supposed to do sothing?"
"I don’t know. You tell ."
"It was you who threw this body at !"
"I know. And it should have made you all pinch your noses."
"Why?"
"Because it stinks like my underwear after I hit the threshold of six tis a day."
"..."
Now all the guards gawked at .
Did I say sothing wrong?
"What is it? Why are you all looking at like I am an Alien?"
Johnson sighed.
"Sorry to break your heart but we have slled so much stuff that this body’s odor simply feels like bread that is left in the open for too long. So, your plan failed."
Jack jerked his head at .
"So you were lying about it? You were lying about the sll? I felt so ashad of my body. I felt like a slut who doesn’t get more than one custor. I thought I was the wrong one here. But the fault was in you! You were the stinking one all along."
"Dude, there are literally flies roaming around your dead body. They are not doing it out of courtesy."
"So what? Butterflies roam around flowers too."
"... Did you just compare your dead body to flowers?"
"No. I compared the flies to butterflies."
"And that makes it better?"
"For , yes. Because it’s only you who has a problem with my dead body. All these people are fine."
"Bro, pigs don’t complain if you throw shit at them. Of course these guards are fine with your stinking dead body. For them it’s Tuesday."
"Did you just call the guards pigs?" Jack looked at Johnson. "Do you hear that? He called you all pigs. I wouldn’t have let that go."
"What the fuck are you doing?! Whose side are you?"
"The fragrant side."
"If they kill you wouldn’t be able to get away from here as well. I thought we decided we won’t fight again."
"Damn. I forgot. But you know, guards are just a scam created by security companies to sell more security."
"That doesn’t even make sense."
"It does. But you are so deep down in your own problems that you have no ti to think about this world’s secrets."
"The fc—"
"Shut up!"
I shut up.
Jack too.
Johnson shouted loud enough and I ca back to the current situation.
Johnson stared at and then after a while, he scoffed.
"You guys made rember the war I had seen three months ago. The Hero king acted just like you. In a serious situation, he argued with his friends just like this. And his voice was the sa as well. And he then disappeared. Wait..." Johnson paused. "Are you... Could it be that you are..."
Shit.
Reviews
All reviews (0)