I have always been smart so as others told repeatedly. Things seed to easy for , while others struggled to grasp such concepts. I started understand what my mother was saying when I was three years old.
I also rember her leaving at the Orphanage when I just turned three. Her reasons? She sotis cursed my as being a strange child. I only cried when I was hungry, even having wet diapers didn't faze because I didn't feel any need remind my mother about it.
I barely spoke to her not because I didn't want to but I didn't know how to address her. Human condition always eluded , I could never tell what others were feeling especially if their emotions. One could tell a plain lie and I would believe it.
It led to countless situation where I was bullied, even the people that were there to take care of didn't bother just because I was a weird child. I never understood what they ant by that. I had all the right body parts, I also eat food and do other chores like other people but sohow I was always being picked on for being an outcast.
It led to spending a lot of ti in front of television. It was the only solace of my life, a way to get away from other people finding comfort in lively images on the screen. Within few months, I started speaking in foreign language which greatly shocked others.
Suddenly, I beca the talk of the small town. That's when the real trouble started but thinking about it, I didn't dislike the attention. It gave more insight on what was going on other people's mind. One great thing that ca out of it was my access to the library.
I was told so high ranking person in the governnt granted access to the library without any charge. It was then that I realized the real value of money. Up until now, I didn't really care about how the exchange of goods happened.
When I learned more about my condition, I read there was always a case of people like to focus intently on one or two subjects neglecting everything else around them.
At least these words freed from so unspoken chain of being an outcast. But as I browsed through the different selection of books, i soon find them boring. All the novel and stories lacked sothing that I couldn't understand. Maybe it was who was lacking but either way, they never interest . Your adventure continues at empire
So of the fellow readers would discuss these stories at length going through the complex emotions of the characters and what challenges they were facing inside their mind when they had to make any tough decisions. Sotis, it would be about so couple overcoming a huge adversity to reach a happy ending.
In my case, I was always puzzled by such discussions. There were always so logical steps these people could take without indulging so much on superficial things. Emotions beca their driving factor but why? Wouldn't it be a completely different story if they understood how to survive and forget about things like love and loyalty?
Love, right, it was sothing I could never understand. So said, a mother's love was the strongest but what about ? Why was I left behind? Wasn't she a mother too? A love between man and woman was sacred. It was also jarring, how could they care to love when their foolish actions was what led to them to demise?
Any other emotion seed pointless, jealousy, fear or even greed. I could never understand their significance. After novels and fictions, I moved to history. This section did interest a little, there were heroic tales coupled with the madness of dictators and monarchs who grappled with self worth and existential crisis.
I would sit outside in the market observing people thinking if they were the next in line to ruin this town or this country in their pursuit of greed and power. History did give so insights to how human mind works but still, if I can't feel an ounce of those emotions what help would that be to ?
When I was twelve, I started experiencing so chances in my body. I also thought others gaze on for the first ti. I couldn't understand it at first but soon, I found out the intricacies of human relation. I read more about it and discovered many things but unlike my peers, I could never get interested in opposite sex.
The whole action seed pointless to . Gushing over so boy who was handso and fit beca a norm for other girls around by the ti I reached sixteen years old. I scanned through most of the books in the small library not knowing where to go from here.
I even had few boys ca up to to ask so question. From the way they talked to how they moved was uneventful. After experiencing a near fatal encounter with one of the n in my village, I completely stopped talking with others.
That day I learned a lesson, I might not be able to understand what they were thinking or whether they were telling truth or not, I could only discern few micromovents of their face to get a clear answer especially the eyes, the eyes of a person could tell most that I want to know.
The man who was responsible for inflicting pain on was beaten to death by the villagers. Emotions might be a fleeting feeling for but I knew what it felt to get hurt. I didn't particularly care about what happened to that man but in the process people began to keep their distance from for so reason.
As I browsed the final section of the library, I found what I was looking for. The perfect thing that explained how things worked and how everything was connected. Before I knew it, I imrsed myself in that world leaving everyone behind.
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