Gu Yan didnt expect him to ask this. He paused mid-step and glanced at the innocent pot of evergreen bamboo that had, for no good reason, t its maker. Are you changing the subject or are you trying to settle old scores?
Yan Suizhi tched. Student Gu was so likeable last night, doing his best to refrain from anything more yet also being a bit clingy; he had needled him to go to bed in fear that hed fall sick, yet also sent him off with his eyes lidded, his gaze heavy, and his arms folded.
Even when he first sneezed downstairs this morning, revealing the first symptoms of a cold, Gu Yans response was especially amusing. He earnestly went through his dicine boxes for half a minute, then silently put a hand to his forehead, starting to reflect on himself.
Yan Suizhi, watching this from the byline, could barely suppress his laughter.
In truth, although he was used to playing the bushy-tailed wolf, he still did feel a bit awkward when he woke up in the morning. However, Lawyer Gus series of actions pulled him out of it. The awkwardness only made a token appearance for no more than half an hour before it disappeared into the wind.
After that, all the way to the law firm, he had a fixation on a particularly entertaining pastiteasing Gu Yan.
In actuality, he had already mastered this art ten years ago. He just didnt expect that after ten years, this fixation had only intensified.
The only difference now was that Gu Yan would no longer storm away in anger.
Resisting the urge to smile, he said to Gu Yan, Why did you suddenly turn so stern during the day, even suspecting
of impure motives? Im only curious to hear your thoughts.
Yan Suizhi paused for a beat after saying this. He smiled guilelessly. Actually, Im very curious about many things involving you.
Such an inclination was probably unprecedented for him.
In truth, he was never an easy one to get close to. He always wandered a respectable distance away from others, never giving them any opportunities to enter his life, nor did he impinge on their lives.
You dont have to explain your thoughts because people would always have divergent opinions. As long as you feel that its worth doing and not one youll regret in the future, then you can give it a tryThis was sothing he used to say frequently.
And Gu Yan was once audience to it too.
But it was different now. It was as if he had stepped into a domain where the door was left open just for him, and, after settling down, finally began taking the initiative to get closer to soone.
This could probably be considered a unique type of special treatnt. Gu Yan naturally wouldnt refuse it.
There indeed was a ti when our ideologies clashed He repeated in a low voice. After ruminating for a mont, he said, It wasnt a particularly pleasant experience for
at that ti. So Im a little unsure where to start.
I rember that one ti, when I was enjoying the evening view on the balcony at a wine party, you ca over to ask
sothing about preserving your aspirations? Yan Suizhi attempted to recall for a while and chuckled lightly, My mory of it is a bit fuzzy. Was it then?
You actually rember this? Gu Yan was startled.
Yan Suizhi, The things that I rember might be much more than youd expect.
Gu Yan gazed at him for a while before nodding and saying, Sowhat. But that was only the trigger
Theres actually a chain reaction to this? Yan Suizhis brows lifted.
Gu Yan,
Actually, it couldnt really be counted as a chain reaction. Rather than saying Gu Yan had abruptly discovered that his ideologies were incongruent to Yan Suizhis, it was better put this wayhe had abruptly gained perspective that the aspirations he had always carried close to heart werent enough to completely project into reality.
Without him having to elaborate further, Yan Suizhi had already astutely pinpointed the source.
Even if Dean Yan kept people at a distance, he did have an understanding of the emotional turmoil and shifts that a student might experience in those years.
Lf jrxfv Xe Tjc j rffwlcuis lggfifnjca defralbc. Po Pw cba wlrajxfc, sbeg qjgfcar jgf lc atf wlilajgs?
Zjhf Fclnfgrlas gfrqfmafv Gf Jjgwjr rabwr jcv cfnfg qjlv ecvef jaafcalbc ab raevfcar yjmxugbecvr. Ktlr kjrca j abqlm atja kbeiv cbgwjiis mbwf eq yfakffc afjmtfgr jcv raevfcar. Lbkfnfg, Tjc Velhtl ralii ujlcfv j rwjaafglcu bo lcobgwjalbc ogbw j ofk lrbijafv kbgvr jcv qtgjrfr lc tlr mbcnfgrjalbcr klat Xe Tjc.
But it was just that, and nothing more.
While others might have limited knowledge of Helan, Yan Suizhi was different. He was even well aware that there was a major conflict involving space pirates less than thirty years ago. It was the largest conflict in centuries, involving and claiming the lives of countless soldiers. Of course, many more pirates were also killed.
After that conflict, Helan received a formal oath of cessation of hostilities for the next three hundred years from the pirate commander. The number of orphans arising from this were also in the hundred thousands, all descendants of soldiers.
So, he had always tacitly taken this as a sensitive subject inappropriate for re university professors to broach with their students.
Hearing this, Gu Yan nodded, replying in affirmation to his conjecture. Mn. They served in the military, but theyve passed on.
Yan Suizhi gazed at him, suddenly understanding why he would struggle with his ideologies. The military creed of Helan prized absolute loyalty, absolute righteousness, and absolute sacrifice.
If his parents were both soldiers, and also ones who had sacrificed their lives in battle for the people of their motherland, then their convictions would have a high likelihood of being dissolved in the blood of their future generations, deeply ingrained in them.
He once saw many descendants of soldiers in an orphanage in Helan. This held true without exception.
Gu Yan saw Yan Suizhis expression.
It was weird. It seed as though after all that had happened last night, he could now clearly discern what he was thinking without the other having to speak, even skipping the guessing step. Perhaps Yan Suizhis response to him last night had given him sufficient confidence.
He supplented, But Im not really an orphan. After my parents passed on, I lived with my grandfather. Hes a judge.
A very austere and uncompromising judge.
So, Gu Yans bones were imbued with an extrely distinctive, near-mule-stubborn ideology that stemd from soldiers loyalty, righteousness, and sacrifice, as well as judges justice and diligence.
Even after being admitted to university, after having decided to beco a lawyer long ago, he had never once wavered in his ideals.
It wasnt that he was oblivious to the nuances of this profession. On the contrary, as a result of his association with his grandfather, his understanding ran much deeper than others.
But people were always like this, especially when flourishing with youth and that bit of harmless arrogance in their spirits. When envisioning hypothetical scenarios, theyd always subconsciously craft idealised situations and outcos, confidently assuming that theyd act and achieve what they had set out to if it ever occurred to them.
Gu Yan, as a student, was much steadier and self-possessed than many others. But people never lacked that bit of arrogance in their youths, and him perhaps even more so. Moreover, he took those convictions much more to heart than many others.
And this was the true starting point of the incongruity.
I attended a lecture of yours in high school, Gu Yan said. You ntioned that lawyers deal with all sorts of lies every day, so of whom would even tell lies themselves. Many people knew that their clients were guilty, but from when they took on defence counsel to the end, they would often forget that, as if their clients were more innocent than anyone else. Over ti, problems of who is deserving of trust and who is just wouldnt even occur to them, because this would make it difficult for them to savour their victories
His cadence was asured, neither hurried nor slow, speaking as he imrsed himself in his mories.
What surprised Yan Suizhi was the clarity of his recollection. What he touched on barely differed from reality. In his mory, that student, who was seated in the first row, frosty as a mint leaf, had never moved his pen to note anything down.
You told the student who raised the question that you hope that we can keep this in mind and occasionally reflect on it. Because this represented the aspirations that would guide us in our schooling days, and you hoped that all of us could preserve this as best we could. Gu Yan was silent for a few seconds after he spoke. Then, he said, It was very much a pleasant surprise for
then.
Yan Suizhi arched a brow, gave restraining himself a valiant attempt before succumbing, and said, As it happens, I do rember that lecture, and I coincidentally rember you as well. Forgive my bluntness, but I thought you went there to waste ti and claim academic credits. I couldnt make out even a smidge of your pleasant surprise at all.
Gu Yan,
However, due to Professor Yans half-joking diversion, Gu Yan, whose eyebrows had furrowed from the recollection, smoothed, and he appeared sowhat exasperated.
Yan Suizhi lifted his chin. Keep going. You were expressionless, but you were actually pleasantly surprised, and then?
For that fleeting mont, Gu Yan seed to want to snipe back or do a little sothing to block a certain soones mouth but he eventually went on. At that ti, I thought that I had t soone whose ideology was completely congruent with mine. Furthermore, I did happen to have so impression of you from before, so this made
happy. But in retrospect, I realised that you neatly avoided addressing the contradiction therein.
Because, in actuality, the suggestion that Yan Suizhi gave those young students didnt truly answer the girls question, nor did it contain any of his thoughts.
Yan Suizhi contemplated it, then said, Actually, that question is very difficult to answer. There are so who avoid ever trying to answer it to save themselves the frustration, and there are so who dwell on it for decades, never able to find an answer. At that age in particular, my words would easily carry considerable sway. Any answer I gave could very possibly have limited your thinking in the decades after.
Mn.
Gu Yan nodded.
He naturally understood this logic. He knew it even without needing Yan Suizhi to say it.
But he hadnt considered it in that way at that ti. He only felt that Yan Suizhis words had moved his subconscious mind.
That was until he ca across that old case.
The suspect was an acclaid deputy director of a hospital who was involved in a homicide case. On this topic, it was actually a little similar to the Elderly Bobblehead case in the present. The suspects attitude was abhorrent, and the public opinion tipped overwhelmingly to one side.
However, Yan Suizhi had proved on the defence counsel that holes existed in the prosecutions evidence.
If everyones experience and intuition, the direction of the existing evidence, and even the suspects reaction pointed towards his guilt, then the happiest solution would be for him to be put on death row for his cri. And yet, there just had to be holes in the evidence.
How should it be handled, in that case?
When Gu Yan had first co across that old case, it wasnt simply a difference in ideologies that caused a change in his attitude and for him to turn to reticence. Rather, it was the contradictions it had with his own ideology that overwheld him.
The character he inherited from his parents was the most simple and pure views of morality and righteousness. Based on this, hed wish to see that suspect left without any way out, thrown into prison for good.
But the justice of the court, which his grandfather had taught to him by example, made him pay particular mind to the perfection of evidence.
And also the presumption of innocence, a principle that should never be discarded.
It was more than just doing case analysis to . During that period I was endlessly drawing hypotheticals. Such as, if I received that case, would I make the sa choice you did, and whether that choice could convince
and conform to all of my convictions, said Gu Yan.
In fact, that period had whittled away a trendous amount of his energy. The final analysis he produced was enough to convince himself, and in the process of analysing the case, his spirit had sharpened and transford beyond anything else ever had.
And then, at its close, he happened to attend that particular wine party Yan Suizhi threw.
He asked Yan Suizhi that question, really only wanting to affirm his thoughts. Yet, Yan Suizhi said that he didnt even consider the dilemma of aspirations conflicting with reality.
I was bogged in a bottleneck at that ti, or maybe better put stuck on an unsolvable problem? Gu Yan said. So when I heard your answer, I felt like I was truly stupid to have spent all that ti conflicted over that case analysis.
Hark, the analysis he worked so hard and long on was an argunt that the other never considered.
It was also that particular period that he realised he was harbouring so absurd ideas for Yan Suizhi, and took his every word with exceptional seriousness.
Yan Suizhi associated this with Gu Yans previous answer and nodded his head, enlightened. His expression changed minutely. So once you graduated, carrying those less-than-decent ideas and conveniently ticked off at , you ran away, never to be heard from again?
Gu Yan,
However Yan Suizhi suddenly smiled. Im glad.
Why are you glad? Gu Yan gazed at him.
Because youre definitely not the type to distort your ideologies to force-fit reality for peace of mind, Yan Suizhi said. Youre my student; I know at least this much.
In fact, in the ten or so years that followed, Gu Yan, whose thoughts had been further steeled into calmness and maturity, was actually grateful for the old case back then. If it werent for that self-tornting argunt and analysis, it probably would have taken him much longer to give himself an answer.
Yan Suizhi gazed at Gu Yan, a smile shining in his eyes.
This was a student he had looked very well upon at one ti. After many years of grinding through reality, he still remained as strong at heart and as pure in integrity.
It was only natural that he was so likeable.
But Professor Yan had a loose tongue. After saying all this, he couldnt resist poking fun at Gu Yan again. What about now?
Gu Yan, Hm?
Do you still think that our ideologies clash? Yan Suizhi asked leisurely, Make sure you answer properly.
What did answer properly an?
And what if they still do? Gu Yans gaze sharpened, turning the question back onto him.
The esteed Professor Yan said, his eyes crinkling rrily, Then thatd be unfortunate. Its hard to say, I might first drown the plants in your courtyard to death, then look and see if there are any others who want to develop more intimate relations with . After all, having clashing ideologies is a major obstacle.
Ten years ago, whensoone, half-seriously but not-at-all-jokingly, caused him to seethe, Gu Yan would slam the door in his wake as he stord off.
But the tis were different now. This was his office; he didnt need to storm off. But he also couldnt bear to drive this soone out.
The only solution that remained was to seal his lips.
Five minutes later, Ms Fizz ca knocking on the door with the legal fees from the Notice of Commission that had just arrived. But by then, the loose-tongued Professor Yan was pinned against the door with his tongue tied up, being kissed out of his life, unable to find the breathing space to answer.
He pressed a thumb to Gu Yans attractive jawline, parting the two of them slightly. He said in a low voice, his eyes crinkled, Do tell, how are you going to explain it if were caught one day? Hm? The office is a place to conduct business, but youre actually using it for misconduct that disrespects your teacher.
Reviews
All reviews (0)