[Ultimate Linda] (mber of the Bud Wack Pirates)
[Level 180]
[Class 4: Queen of the Seas]
[Reputation: Child rearing expert]
[System information: She's wearing the lost legendary pearl around her neck! You might die if you remove it and she finds out!]
'I-I don't know what her reputation ans, nor why she took my shirt for no reason. Does she have a lot of children, or does she just raise them and does she also take shirts of n before forcing them to conceive with her? Also, I thought this was an easy quest! There is no way I'm getting the pearl from her! It's nestled in a very safe place!'
"Why are you looking at my pants?' Ultimate Linda smiled and gently played with her shirt strap. She bit her lip and for so reason it scared Harvard! He wasn't looking at her pants, she was looking at his pants! "You-you think I'm easy or sothing? You think if you look at my pants they'll just disappear?"
"No! I-I just was wondering why you have a necklace that goes all the way down to your belly button! Shouldn't it stop, you know, above your beautiful, hard not to stare at upper body?"
"Oh, this necklace? You can have it if you take a quest," Ultimate Linda smiled and took a small little coffer out of the drawer at the table they were sitting at and put it down on the desk. "Here, I've been keeping this Quest hidden for the right man. You look like you have the right size pants for the job?"
"What? What do my pants have to do with completing a quest?" Harvard sighed and pointed at the necklace. "Fine, give the necklace and I'll accept the quest! However, it says I'm supposed to defeat you! How do I do that?"
"Upstairs, there is a ga I like to play," Ultimate Linda sighed and jiggled before pointing at the coffer. "Now, open up the chest so I can stop wearing this damn accursed necklace! It's ti to fight the battle upstairs so you can win the war!"
###
Ten minutes later,
Harvard wiped the sweat off his head and got out of Ultimate Linda's bed. It was a tough battle, but luckily, he ca out on top!
[You've discovered Ultimate Linda's last pirate ship!]
[You are the victor!]
"Damn it! You win again!" Linda bit her lip and ate the candy pirate ship. She had made an edible ga called pirate's cove where each person got 10 ships and 20 opportunities to guess which of the 50 coves the ships had been put under! For so reason, Harvard beat her 5 tis in a row! She wanted to tear off her shirt, but that would only make Harvard happier! Damn it! It was like he had so skill to see through objects and not clothes!
[Stealth Eye has leveled up to level 3!]
[You can now see through thicker treasure chests!]
'Ugh, she has good instincts,' Harvard wiped the sweat off his forehead. "Now, I beat you at your ga. I suppose you'll keep your promise and apologize to the Insane Underwater Bandit King."
"Sure, but first I'm going to make you pay for beating at my own ga! Let's wrestle, jerk!"
###
15 minutes later, 30 minutes before Harvard went on the hardest, most-diffucult journey of his life, he had finally succeeded! He finally completed the hidden quest!
"Hmph, it wasn't that great," Ultimate Linda wiped the sweat off her head. "Hmph, you may wrestle well, but don't think I like you. I-I'm a pirate! I'm a free won, and I fight with and wrestle with whover I want! Don't think any man can tie down!"
[Quest Update: Tie Linda Down]
[She hasn't had a child in 100 years, and thinks tying her up and wrestling with her might be the key! She looks 18, doesn't she?]
'I-I'm not accepting that quest! That's ridiculous!' Harvard tried to accept it, but Ultimate Linda refused to give it to him! What? Was there wrestling not good enough for a round 2?
"I-I'm scared. I-I'm scared of the Insane Underwater Bandit King," Ultimate Linda put on a black cape with two eye patches over her mouth, and a pair of black glasses. "Can you recognize with all this strange gear on?"
"You'll be fine," Harvard sighed and finally saw the window he'd been waiting for. "Ha, but it's finally ti for to et the Insane Underwater Pirate King!" He ran with Linda to the beach and saw a familiar man with a bandana and an eye patch gently massaging two won's backs. "Now, whatever man is the Insane Underwater Pirate King please show yourself! This student of yours did everything you asked tis 1000! I repeat! Show yourself!"
[New Quest received: Dig a pathway to the tunnel of the Insane Underwater Pirate King]
[Quest item received: You will find one small kids shovel in your inventory. In the next ten minutes, you must find the pathway to her forsaken lair!]
###
15 minutes later, and 10 minutes before Harvard risked his life doing sothing extrely stupid, Harvard found a woman up above him laughing.
"What? What is it?" Harvard looked up and saw a woman's gigantic cleavage, and blocked the blazing sun with the small blue digging shovel so he could see her face! Damn it! He was certain he was about to find that lair, but now he was being interrupted! Who was this blasphamous, quest interrupting woman!
"I'm the Insane Underwater Bandit King. Hmph, what? You think just because King Yama is a woman I can't be a woman as well? Hah?! Well, get up here and say that to my face!" The beautiful brunette lady laughed and shook her head. "Co on, I have a real quest for you Harvard, enough digging."
'Another fake quest. That also ans she's probably a fake,' Harvard jumped out of the 20 ter deep hole and felt sothing penetrate his arm. "Ow! What did you just do?!"
[Green Reversal Sirum has been applied!]
[You will no longer turn into a monster that can't conceive! May Tape and Shea are eagerly awaiting your return for your nightly journey towards parenthood!]
[ 30 Dexterity]
[ 20 Agility!]
Harvard sighed and took a needle out of his arm and looked over at the supposed Insane Underwater Bandit King. She was wearing a two piece blue swimsuit, had an extrely large bosom, extrely pristine white skin and brown doe eyes. Hmph, he then looked down and noticed his shirt had again been changed! The Insane Underwater King was probably testing him right now at this very mont by stealing his shirt and making him et this fake woman! He had to be careful or he might very well be killed because of his negligence!
"Sit down, I know I have a nice butt, but please stop staring." Manicelan, the Insane Underwater Bandit King's real na, laid back on a beach blanket and patted for Harvard to sit down next to her. "Co on. I have an important quest for you, and we don't have much ti. Soon, the sea level might rise so high I can't even sun bathe in the rain."
'What am I doing? Why don't I just scan her?' Harvard sat down next to the Insane Underwater Bandit King and then got distracted from his scan because a small boy and his father played frisbee on the beach. The frisbee had a picture of Harvard with his head underneath a guillotine, so that was kind of interesting for Harvard to see. However, it seed too quiet. Like any mont, sothing terrible might happen.
"You look so worried, relax," Manicelan pointed into the ocean. A few ships that had gotten destroyed by the Dragontail Kraken a few weeks ago were laying on the reef in bits and pieces, but besides that it was pretty. "I think you earned it. A shot at being the next Insane Land and Water Bandit. What do you say?"
[New Quest received: Beco the apprentice of the Insane Underwater Bandit King]
[The Insane Underwater Bandit King is also known as the Insane Land Bandit King! Whether on dry land or at sea, she is capable of unleashing her maximum amount of damage! Though she is only strongest at 6 PM and 6 AM during Dusk and Dawn, she is still nonetheless unaffected by fighting in the water! Do you dare try and take up this mantle and beco the next Bandit King?]
[Investigate and find the location of the Monsoon Kraken's Hidden Water Army in order to begin your journey to becoming the second most hated person in the world!]
[System information: This is most likely just 1 quest out of fifty. Be careful before you accept it imdiately!]
'I guess I should think about it,' Harvard pinched himself. "Well, I thought about it! I accept the Quest! Now tell where the real Insane Underwater Bandit King is! This is a fake quest, right? There is no way a woman with such a large chest would give out such an easy quest! Most won like you are really hard to get into bed let alone get quests from! Now tell , where is the real Insane Underwater King Banidt?"
"I am," Manicelan gently rubbed Harvard's face and then smacked him real hard. He spun three tis, and then accidentally landed in her bosom. "Hmph, you can consider yourself lucky that I let you fall into my chest because I wanted you to see where I hide my weapons! However, get going! The world needs you to save it!"
"So interesting. How many weapons do you have in there?" Harvard blushed and turned to face the ocean. "Well, anyways! I took a dagger if you don't mind!"
"You bastard!" Harvard disappeared into the ocean before Maniclan smiled. "You shall make a good student. However, be careful. His Water Army is very large. You'll need more than just two daggers to stop it."
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