Everybody Loves Large Chests Interlude - A Day to Remember

Interlude - A Day to Rember

Today was a historic day for Azurvale, as well as the Ishigar Republic as a whole. It marked the end of a social stigma that had plagued these lands ever since the days of the oppressive regi that was the Dominion. That said, one wouldnt be able to tell this if they simply walked the streets and talked to people. So what if the first sa-sex marriage in centuries was about to take place? That wouldnt put food on peoples tables or keep a roof over their head, so they werent too bothered about it. There were citizens that cared imnsely about it, of course, but they seed to be in the minority.

The fact that the one getting married was Keira Morgana, though? Now that was sothing that interested them. The catgirl had more or less beco Azurvales sweetheart by now, mostly due to her pivotal role in solving the tragedy of the Great Collapse. Or so the masses were led to believe, at least. Self-proclaid star reporter Daylor Varic still clung to the idea that the whole thing was an orchestrated hoax, but he had given up on trying to expose the red-headed Hero. Not only had his efforts over the past few weeks turned up zero evidence to suggest Morgana was hiding sothing, but the stress of staking out such a high-profile target was finally getting to him.

So, in the end, the man had decided it wasnt worth it, and was now focused on reporting on the celebrity wedding itself. As one might imagine from such a large affair, the event had attracted all manner of prominent figure, both from within the Republic and beyond. Elves, humans, beastkin, dwarves, gnos, raptors, even a few kryr dignitaries and a handful of nosferatu were present. The sheer variety of people attending made the whole thing feel like so kind of circus. The only thing that seed to connect all these people was that they had, in one way or another, beco closely acquainted with the Hero of Chaos over the past few years.

It therefore ca as no surprise that a few other Heroes seed to be in attendance seemingly by pure coincidence. Orrin and Sigmund hadnt exactly been on the guest list and the wedding planners hadnt accounted for their presence - especially in the giants case - but they were allowed to witness the proceedings all the sa. Thankfully Sigmunds armor and Orrins priestly robes looked ceremonial enough to pass off as adequate outfits for the formal affair. Gux and his worn travelers clothes were another story entirely, but the old lizard was nowhere to be seen, having decided to observe the proceedings remotely through his Ultimate Skill.

That said, the Inquisitor and the giant didnt seem to be here for the wedding itself, judging by their conversation.

Wait, he actually ca through? Sigmund asked in disbelief. I was certain he was just going to scam you out of your treasures.

Indeed, Orrin nodded. I expected trickery as well, but his reputation for being a professional first and foremost seems to be well-earned.

I guess even scumbags like this Sandman have their uses.

The two of them were currently in a relatively secluded corner of the reception area in front of the grand temple of Nyrie where the actual wedding ceremony would take place. It was hardly the most secure place to have this discussion, but neither of them felt like they had anything to hide.

So who was the lucky one to use the item first? Sigmund raised an eyebrow.

Bjrn, Solus bless his soul, insisted that he be the vanguard, as per usual. He was also the one among my comrades who would benefit most from it.

And the result?

See for yourself.

Orrin retrieved an inscribed gemstone from inside his robes and held it out in the sunlight. This caused a small illusory replica of Bjrns new look to sprout from it. His flesh, bones, and blood had been replaced with steel, gears, and fla, respectively. This transformation was made possible by the spherical relics the Sandman had sold to the giants shortly before the shapeshifter engaged the Rank Up process. Boxxy had rembered Orrins request during the Hero eting and had decided it might as well take advantage of the giants desperation to add so of their sacred treasures to its hoard without much hassle.

For what it was worth, Orrin felt that he had gotten a pretty good deal, even with the steep asking price. He didnt even question how and when the Sandman mightve acquired those golem eggs and simply waved it off as a form of divine providence. All that mattered was that Orrins group had gotten everything they couldve hoped for and more. The Warrior called Bjrn had beco an imposing furnace golem whose intense flas promised to turn legions of undead to ash and cinders. The scaled-down still image that Orrin was holding could hardly convey what it was like to actually stand in Bjrns presence, but Sigmund had correctly guessed that he was many tis more fearso in person.

Woah, thats pretty cool!

An oddly familiar voice startled both n, nearly making Orrin drop the magical gemstone he was holding. They looked down to see an almost unbelievably beautiful pale-skinned girl in a heavy cloak, who seed to have appeared out of thin air. She was currently gawking at the illusory image like a child witnessing magic for the first ti.

Who might you be, young lady? the giant asked sternly as he put away his trinket.

What dyou an? the girl looked confused for a second. Oh, right. Neither of you have seen without this thing on.

She then pulled a pearly-white skull mask from underneath her hood.

Kaede?! Sigmund blurted out.

How rude, she pouted. Dont just shout soone elses na, old man. Im trying to keep a low profile here.

R-right. Sorry. I just didnt expect you to be so yknow

Not hideous? she smirked.

Yeah

Its fine, youll get used to it. Whats with that badass-looking uncle you were looking at, though? Is that part of your plan to retake the giants holand?

The two of them montarily wondered how she even caught wind of that, but realized asking about it would probably get them nowhere.

Thats right, Orrin answered grimly. About a week ago one of Keiras acquaintances sold us a curious relic he called a golem egg. It has the ability to turn people into golems while also allowing them to retain their sense of self.

Neat, she casually remarked. So what are they going to do when you beat up the Bonershaper and you get your land back?

I uh the giant stamred.

He looks kinda like Fizzy, Kaede continued. That ans hes not just any golem, but a war golem. And from what I know, that na isnt just for show. They kinda live for war, and get super pissy if they dont have enough of it. So what are you going to do when you run out of undead to wage war on?

It was impossible to deny that the radiant construct in question had gone to fight the orcs on Velos just because she, in her own words, needed skulls to bash to scratch her itchy servos. Admittedly that wasnt entirely true, but it was still a little-known fact that she constantly had to keep her violent impulses in check. There was no way soone with that sort of disposition would be able to lead a peaceful life. Which, given a golems ageless nature, could be a really long ti.

Well figure that out when we get to it, Orrin regained his composure. Though you perhaps have a point that we should be moderate with our conversions.

Uh-huh. Just make sure you dont create more work for . Im already super busy as it is.

Kaede wasnt being entirely honest with that statent. In truth, her workload as the Hero of Death was akin to that of a rebellious teenager whose only real responsibility was to take out the trash and occasionally sweep the house. Her warning had been genuine, she just didnt want to appear incompetent or inadequate in front of her peers. Especially since, while snooping around out of habit, she had gotten a glimpse at Keira getting ready for the ceremony and had noticed that her true na was no longer Boxxy T. Morningwood and her HP total was now a much more reasonable number. She had no idea what to make of that, but her gut instinct told her she had noticed sothing she wasnt supposed to notice. She quickly arrived at the conclusion that it was better to keep playing dumb rather than asking questions she probably didnt want to know the answers to, but the revelation had still shaken her up a bit.

Oh? I think I see a familiar face, Sigmund declared while squinting over the crowd. Well talk about this golem matter later, Orrin. I have a personal matter to attend to.

Elsewhere in the reception area, Nao had just arrived along with the nephilim triplets. The wolfkin was wearing an extrely colorful and extravagant robe that bordered on being an eyesore. He stood out like a sore thumb to say the least, though it wasnt just his attire that garnered attention. There was also the fact that he was being accompanied by three stunning blonde beauties all of whom clearly had bellies full of kids. Admittedly that alone was hardly scandalous, but with Maddie and Lydia clinging to an arm each and Robin hovering directly behind him, it was painfully clear exactly what was going on.

Truth be told, Nao had expected people to give him dirty looks. He showed up to the wedding fully prepared to be judged by outsiders who had no idea what his circumstances were. He had not, however, foreseen what was about to happen. The Hero of Magic was in the process of having Madeline happily feed him one of the appetizers from the banquet table when he felt a dark shadow loom over him.

Uncle Sigmund!

He then nearly choked on the tiny sandwich in his mouth when he heard Lydia say those words. He turned around on his heel and confird with a pale face that the Hero of Justice was, in fact, standing right next to him. And judging by the look on Sigmunds face, he wasnt exactly here to congratulate Nao on his impending fatherhood. The fact that he was decked out in full Paladin armor was hardly encouraging, either.

Uh, h-hi there Sig- Sigmund, he stamred. F-f-fancy seeing you here! Is there, uh, sothing I can h-help you with?

So, Sigmund finally spoke, you are planning to take responsibility for your actions, yes?

Uh Um.. Wh- What?

The man leaned over the much shorter wolfkin and placed an armored hand on his shoulder. He was sweating profusely by this point. It was also the mont when Nao realized that the triplets had carried out what could only be described as a tactical retreat and were now several ters away from him. He glanced at them, begging for help with his eyes, but all he got in response were polite business-like smiles and a rather unconvincing whisper of You can do it! That and Lydia seed to be preparing her healing magic, which was both reassuring and not.

Sigmund "advising" Nao, sketch by dmaxcustom

Goddess of Love and rcy? Keira asked amidst the stunned silence.

Indeed, my sweet, sweet, Keira, the deity spoke in a soothing tone. My na is Helena, and it is the purity and intensity of the feelings that you and your beloved have for one another that have given enough strength to make myself known to you.

Okay but why?

You have both faced hardships and tragedy, but your mutual devotion alone has persisted throughout, as I have no doubt it will continue to do so. Truly it is a beautiful thing.

Helena seed incredibly moved by the whole affair, to the point where she had to wipe away a few tears of joy. This was no re act, but her sincere feelings. Christie made sure of that when she rehabilitated Eren, the Old God of Destruction, into the voluptuous goddess that was now making her existence known to the world. The people attending this particular wedding had co from all walks of life and from all corners of Terrania and would surely spread word that a new deity had been born.

And in doing so they would unwittingly begin the final phase of Erens rehabilitation. The process had started with Overlord Shridiaphrial warping the minds of the Old Gods cult through extrely selective debauchery. The mortals in the remote mountain town of Witchaven had been brainwashed into believing that sex and love were interchangeable, and now partook in the forr at every opportunity. The belief of the followers shaped the deity, so the cults newfound desire to make love, not war had been the first step towards reforming their malicious god.

The second and arguably hardest step had been to convince the deity to fully embrace these new concepts that were now creeping into its being. Shridiaphrial had spent every waking mont since Erens capture personally attending to the old god with the aim of doing just that. Ranker demons had the unique property of being able to directly influence a divine being if they applied the power of their immortal souls correctly, and none were better at this than Overlords. Under the Succubus Queens skillful manipulations, Eren had been successfully reforged into Helena. All that was left was to ensure the newly appointed Goddess of Love and rcy had a strong enough following to keep her from reverting to her original self.

Hence why she was making this extrely public appearance at Keira and Rowanas wedding. It was an opportunity that had fit perfectly into Wendys divine plan. The only problem was that, due to circumstances beyond his control, the central figure of the event had suddenly undergone a drastic change of heart, so to speak. Resolving that issue and ensuring that the wedding went off without a hitch had required so drastic asures.

Which was to say that the whole reason why the God of Probability had turned Keira Morgana into a real person was for this singular mont in ti. It wasnt as if he particularly wanted to pull a dick move on Boxxy by suddenly robbing it of its Facade and Hero titles, but he deed it a necessary course of action. Giving up the best Hero hed ever had stung, but Terrence was changing Terranias history for countless centuries to co. It was far too important an undertaking to risk over his personal relationship with the statistical hiccup called Boxxy T. Morningwood.

That said, Rosemary still adored that incredibly curious box, and would continue to monitor and broadcast its adventures by using its familiars as focal points for as long as he could.

So what do you want from us?

In more current events, and completely oblivious to what was going on behind the scenes, Keira was less than pleased to have this big bimbo steal her spotlight. She was fairly certain that she should be attempting to stab the goddess in her smug face right now. Admittedly it was probably for the best she could not go knifey wifey right now, but that didnt an she was happy about it. Forced sense of tranquility or not, the redhead still had the logical thinking ability to deduce how she would normally react to this sort of developnt, and she didnt appreciate having her free will tampered with.

More importantly she had also realized that this deity most likely had an ulterior motive to showing up, despite giving what appeared to be a heartfelt and sincere speech.

To uphold your passionate wedding vows to the best of your abilities, Helena answered. Nothing more. Nothing less. I have also co bearing a gift most sincere, that I hope you will accept with glee.

Alright, lets have it so you can be on your way, Keira said with as much force as she could put into her voice.

Actually this particular boon is not for you, but for your lovely wife, the goddess turned her face towards Rowana.

Huh? M-? the elf asked, stupefied.

Indeed. Would you accept the honor of championing Love and rcy as my Hero?

Of course! Rowana shouted without a hint of hesitation. If it will ensure that I get to spend my days in marital bliss, then I will gladly agree to it!

Now wait a minute-!

Keira attempted to talk so sense into her naive spouse. She had a number of vivid mories of misery brought on by her own divine title and wanted to make sure Rowana didnt repeat her mistakes, but it was already too late. Helena bent over and blew Rowana a soft kiss, causing a set of disembodied pink lips to float through the air. They dispersed into a light smog that swirled around the elf for a few monts as part of the goddesss divine spark settled into its new host.

Feat of strength perford! You have unlocked a new Perk: Hero of Love.

Proficiency level increased. Sensory Link is now Level 1.

Proficiency level increased. Hand of rcy is now Level 1.

Proficiency level increased. Essence Concealnt is now Level 1.

The first of the new Skills Rowana had received would make it possible for two people to connect in ways that would otherwise be impossible. While Sensory Link was active, one party would experience everything else that the other was going through. Not only basic senses, such as touch, taste, and sll, but also emotional responses like happiness, sorrow, frustration, and, of course, love. It allowed two people to truly beco one in mind and body, and the newlyweds would no doubt find a number of very creative and enjoyable uses for it during their honeymoon.

As for Hand of rcy, it was a powerful once-per-day healing ability that had the combined potency of a panacea and a rejuvenation potion, but with none of the downsides associated with either concoction.

Woah! the elf exclaid, a huge smile on her face. I feel tingly!

I am sure many blessed days await you both, my dear, Helena smiled. I would also greatly appreciate it if you paid a visit to my cute followers at the town of Witchaven at so point after your honeymoon, but for now, I should not take up any more of your special day. Farewell, and may peace be with you.

And with those final words, Helenas form vanished like a mirage, and the aura of tranquility she had bathed the temple in disappeared with it. The guests, who had been left speechless during that exchange, now erupted into an even louder deluge of applause and congratulations than they had previously. Not all of them were pleased to have their emotions toyed with, but this developnt was far too exciting to fret over the details. Or the consequences, for that matter.

Of course, the Morgana family had their own thoughts on the matter, as did those among the attendees that were on a first-na basis with one or both of the brides.

Ugh I just hope our lovemaking doesnt trigger a Clash of Fate or sothing, Keira grumbled under her breath as she walked down the central aisle.

Well certainly find that out soon enough, Rowana bit her lip in anticipation while holding her wife close. That dress is staying on the entire night, by the way.

I see, so so stranger showed up and coerced my daughter into a shady contract, Doris cracked her knuckles. Ive never punched a god in the face before. Do you think they bleed rainbows?

Easy now, Mother. Im sure sister-in-law has things under control, Elias reassured her in a low voice. What Im worried about is how pissed off Keira will be when I start leveraging Rowanas new position to sell an obscene amount of our beauty products.

Lia didnt say or do much - she just stood in her spot near the altar with a dopey, spaced-out look on her face that seed to imply she was utterly convinced this was all just a silly dream.

Well, that just happened, Fizzy remarked inwardly. At least that rookie goddess wont be Boxxys problem. Or mine, for that matter. Really dodged a Fireball on that one.

Really? Sigmund cringed. I get that shes the Hero of Chaos and I know theres a Shift happening and all, but REALLY?!

Hah hah hah haaaaah! Orrin let out a jolly laugh. Chin up, Sigmund! Today is a day for celebration like no other! Well party so hard we might cause an international incident or two!

This Helena better be able to help out with the polygamy thing, or Im done for, Nao murmured in a depressed voice.

Wow! So they loved each other so hard they boinked a goddess into existence? Madeline asked excitedly.

What are you- No, thats not how that works, Lydia hastily corrected her. Thats not how that works at all!

What I dont get is how she can be a goddess of Love and Misery. That combination makes no sense, Robin remarked, having sohow misunderstood the deitys domains.

Yes! I called it! Kaede cheered. I just won the entire damned betting pool!

So guests had gotten together to place bets on who or what would crash the wedding and the young nosferata had been the only one to put money down on a deity making a personal appearance. She had figured literally anything could happen after noticing Keiras drastic yet subtle transformation and had gone for the most ridiculous thing she could think of. Her wild guess had paid off big ti, as she was now poised to collect a hefty sum to the tune of seven thousand GP. Gux, on the other hand, had missed the entire thing. Remotely viewing the days proceedings with his Ultimate Skill had proven to be rather ntally taxing, and the old raptor had ended up dozing off during the ministers initial speech.

As for the clergyman in question, he had been left with a great many questions. He had no reason to doubt his eyes, but it was still an unbelievable occurrence. Gods showing themselves to mortals like that was the stuff of legends, myths, and fiction. One thing was for certain though - he would make sure to personally lead a missionary expedition to this town of Witchaven that the Goddess of Love and rcy had ntioned. It was important to investigate whether this new religion was legitimate or not, and if it was, then it was vital that information regarding their numbers and beliefs was brought back to the Republic.

Incidentally, this decision had very little to do with the fact that Helena had appeared directly above the ministers head and had inadvertently given him a clear view up her skirt.

That said, the Priests sudden interest in her followers stance on the necessity of underwear was another case entirely.