Chapter 72:
I finally escaped the library with help from Clodys. I walked straight to Lucretius’s quarters. To his bedroom.
He looked at in confusion, but I ignored it and asked without preamble, “Please stop the dowager empress’s marriage plan for Princess Liliana.”
“...”
He studied as usual. He patted his chin and asked, “Why?”
“Please just do it.”
“Well, I don’t understand why I need to do it.”
I smiled brightly. I knew exactly what to say to make him do what I want.
“When you gave a cup of poisoned water, you didn’t give an explanation either, rember? I think you need to do a favor without knowing the reason.”
“...”
He seed stunned for a second. After a short silence, he raised his hands as a sign of surrender and replied, “Alright. I will do it. Besides... I can guess why.”
He already knew I was trying to get to the princesses, so it was not a hard guess. Obviously, I was trying to be on the princess’ good side.
It would have been easy for to explain my reason to him. I knew that if I did, he would have done what I asked. The reason I insisted on not telling him was... I was just being difficult.
I was still a bit angry at him. Now that I forced him to do sothing for , I felt a little better.
Perhaps I could stop being angry at him for spying on .
Then suddenly, I noticed where I was.
I was in his bedroom and Lucretius was on his bed. He still wasn’t fully recovered, but he was already back to work. There were several pieces of paper scattered around him.
The fact that I didn’t even ask him how he was doing made feel guilty. He was still a patient after all.
To hide my guilt, I grabbed the papers from his hand and said to him angrily.
“This is why you aren’t getting better faster! Look how I recovered in only two days! I rested and I got better quickly!”
He tried to make an excuse in a weak voice.
“But I am getting bett...”
I ignored him and called for his assistant. I handed the docunts to him and ordered him not to give Lucretius any work until he beca well again.
After a long sigh, I turned around. He was still in his pajamas and leaning against the headboard. He did look much better than yesterday.
Suddenly, I rembered what happened last night.
His naked chest, his weight on , the kiss...
And the scars on his back.
Without thinking, I blurted out.
“Last night... I didn’t an to see it, but... While I was changing your shirt... I...”
When I hesitated, Lucretius seed to realize what I was asking.
He smiled bitterly and answered, “So you saw.”
“... Yes.”
“Well, you were bound to find out sooner or later. We will always live together after all.”
... What the heck was he talking about? Always live together?
Normally, I would have argued the fine points, but I didn’t feel like it was appropriate. We were talking about a sensitive subject, so I decided to let this one go.
He asked, “So, what do you want to know?”
“Isn’t it... uncomfortable?”
“They happened a long ti ago, so they don’t cause any pain anymore.”
I shook my head.
“Not that. Um... I just ant that you must not want anyone to see them.”
Lucretius surprised by smiling.
“Like I said, you were bound to find out at so point. Besides, it’s not a secret. Everyone knew how the dowager empress and the forr emperor treated when I was little.”
I couldn’t understand. It made sense that the dowager empress was cruel to him, but even the forr emperor? Lucretius was his only living son, so why would he hurt him?
I must have looked confused because Lucretius smiled awkwardly and continued, “I don’t consider the forr emperor my father. I have his blood, but that’s it.”
If I had a cruel father like that, I would have felt the sa way too.
He continued quietly, “I don’t know if you are aware, but my grandfather, Kentius the Third, was a great and celebrated emperor.”
“Really?”
I vaguely rembered the priestess ntioning his painting. She said he looked just like Lucretius.
The emperor continued, “For the last several generations, my family has been having difficulty siring a male heir. That was why the forr emperor was able to take the throne despite how lacking he was.”
That made sense. The forr emperor was such a creep who was not very bright.
Lucretius continued, “The forr emperor didn’t resemble my grandfather at all. Both his looks and his abilities. There were constant rumors about him not being my grandfather’s legitimate son.”
“Oh...”
“So when I was born, the forr emperor was very pleased at first.”
“Why?”
“Because I resembled my grandfather. This proved that he was my grandfather’s son.”
“I see...”
Then why did the forr emperor hate Lucretius?
I asked, “Then why did he abuse you? You were the living proof that he had royal blood.”
Lucretius smiled bitterly. “It was because... He has always been jealous of his father.”
“...”
“All his life, the forr emperor has been compared to my grandfather, and he could never be as good of a man or an emperor.” Lucretius paused before continuing, “Imagine how the forr emperor must have felt whenever he saw , who looked exactly like his hated father.”
However, to , it still didn’t make it right. To abuse your own son because you felt inadequate was unacceptable.
I replied, “It’s not fair. It’s unacceptable.”
Lucretius smiled smoothly.
“I agree. On top of that, that woman made it even worse. Of course, it happened only until my mid-teens. When I got big enough, I fought back, and they stopped.”
“...”
“From then on, the dowager empress sent all kinds of assassins to . If I wasn’t the only living son, the forr emperor would have sent his own assassins too.”
Even on earth, the fight for power between father and son happened in history too.
Lucretius continued, “It was getting very dangerous. As the dowager empress’ due date got closer, the forr emperor was wondering about how to get rid of in case the baby was a boy.”
“And that is why...”
“Yes. Before I was killed, I killed him first to survive. You may scorn , but I don’t regret what I have done.”
“...”
“There is nothing I wouldn’t do to survive. That is why I killed even my own father. I don’t even have the moral or decency to regret what I have done.”
I didn’t know why he was telling this.
He reached out to and held my wrist. He wasn’t forceful like last night. Instead, he pulled towards him gently.
I knew in my head I should resist, but I couldn’t. My body moved towards him easily.
He kissed the back of my hand and looked up.
He asked, “Do you feel contempt for ?”
It felt like soone hit in the head. I felt stunned.
I asked myself.
Did I scorn him?
It was true his past was terrible. His childhood was like hell. To survive, he had to beco the devil himself.
Lucretius killed his own father, and he said he didn’t regret it.
It was shocking and immoral. Anybody would have looked down on him, but...
Not . I couldn’t. I shouldn’t.
I smiled honestly. “No way. I don’t have the right to judge you.”
His smile was bitter. “Such a vague answer.”
I shook my head. “I didn’t an it like that. Do you not rember?”
I took a deep breath and continued.
“I was there with you that night, and I gave a false witness statent. Even when everyone accused the wrong person of the murder, I stayed quiet.”
“...”
“Everyone in the world may judge you harshly, but at least for , I don’t have the right to do that.”
I didn’t know what his expression ant.
Was it relief?
He looked like... he was freed.
He kissed my hand again and whispered, “Yes. You are my only accomplice. I forgot.”
He hugged , and again, I couldn’t refuse him.
Just like that, Luc fell asleep.
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