The reason I couldn’t easily agree with Go Yohan’s words was because of that unfamiliar number—86—that had been squeezing my brain dry since the finals.
After grading my answers, I usually wrote down my predicted score proudly at the top of the paper. But this ti, I couldn’t bring myself to do it. My face burned hot, and I quickly flipped the test paper over, crumpled it up, and shoved it into my bag. I didn’t grade any of the other tests after that.
The days I had been desperately avoiding finally passed, and today arrived.
Our horoom teacher entered, holding a thick stack of papers in one hand. We already had a good guess about what they were since the teacher had announced a few days ago that the report cards were coming. The classroom quickly settled down, and the teacher called out the first na on the sheet.
“Kang Jun.”
Of course, they called first. Out of all people.
Eyes filled with a ssy mix of anticipation and anxiety landed on . The order was supposed to be random—so why the hell was I first? My legs felt like they were weighed down with sandbags, each step heavy and dragging.
“……”
“……Here’s your report card, Jun-ah.”
The teacher’s face, twisted up and crumpled like a piece of discarded paper, gave a pretty clear idea of what disaster was waiting for inside that report card. My vision flashed bright yellow for a split second.
No way. No, no, no. Seriously—no.
There was no ti for hesitation. I didn’t even open it right away. Just like the last ti, I folded the paper in half the second it touched my hand and returned to my seat. My pathetic pride wouldn’t let check it on the spot. Once I sat down, I unfolded the report card as casually as I could, forcing a neutral expression onto my face.
But I’ve always been overly aware of my surroundings, so before I dared to look, I glanced up.
Lim Yungi and Park Haon, sitting in front of , had already turned their bodies halfway around, blatantly peeking at my report card’s cover.
My face burned with heat.
The hell are these assholes looking at?
The fact that I was even thinking like this ant I was already dood. But still—better this than letting them see crumble.
“Hey, what rank are you?”
“First place again, right?”
“Who knows…”
I laughed awkwardly and covered the paper with my hand. Park Haon imdiately chid in.
“What? You didn’t check yet?”
“Well… I’m kinda nervous.”
“Want to check for you?”
“No!”
Park Haon’s hand shot forward, playful and teasing. But my nerves flared up, and I slamd my hand down over the report card before he could touch it.
“I’ll check it later myself.”
“Why? You’re obviously first again.”
“No… I don’t think so. I really don’t.”
My face twisted involuntarily, but I smoothed it out with effort. I forced a laugh, playing weak on purpose. Laying the groundwork—because my pride demanded it. It’s better to act like I’ve already hit rock bottom than to pretend I’m on top and get humiliated when the truth cos out. People are more forgiving when you’re down than when you’re cocky and fall.
I’d rather be pitied than laughed at.
So I doubled down on the whining.
“I swear… I really bombed it. I’m screwed. Totally screwed.”
“Co on. Even if you bombed it, you’re still top ten at worst, right?”
“No. It’s worse. Way worse.”
“If you’re screwed, then we’re all beyond dead. Chill.”
“I’m serious. This ti, it’s really over.”
I stomped my foot for dramatic effect. But the funny thing is, the more I acted like I failed, the more I believed it myself.
The words I’m screwed stamped themselves into my brain.
This ti, it felt real. I knew I was done for.
The biggest clue? The teacher’s face. The way they looked when they handed my report card—that was real, genuine misery.
“Park Haon.”
“Yes!”
A few more nas were called before Park Haon’s turn ca.
At the sa ti, Lim Yungi’s eyes shifted to Ha-on.
Seizing that mont, I unfolded my report card just a sliver—just enough to see the number at the bottom.
My hand froze mid-motion.
Clear as day, two numbers:
Class rank: 7.
School rank: 12.
Seven. Seven… Twelve. Twelve. Twelve. Twelve. Twelve—Twelve.
My brain felt like it had been tossed into a sieve, everything but my panic draining straight into the void.
“What… the hell…?”
I’ve never—NEVER—seen or gotten a rank like this.
My body went cold, my head filled with static.
Desperate, I scanned the paper again, clinging to the absurd hope that maybe, just maybe, I’d read it wrong. Maybe 12 was my class rank, and 7 was my school rank.
But reality didn’t budge.
The floor felt like it spun beneath .
Suddenly—bam! A burst of noise from the desk in front of .
“Oh, shit! I got 6th! Damn! Who the hell dropped below ? Holy crap—whoever it is, thanks a ton!”
Park Haon, face flushed with excitent, grabbed Lim Yungi’s wrist and shook him in victory.
He spun around—
I slapped my report card shut.
And yet, in that frantic mont, the pettiest thought hit :
No one saw that, right?
The weight of that worry pressed on my chest like a stone.
“Hey, I’m sixth in the whole school!”
With his fist clenched tight, Park Haon swung it around, shouting about how he had finally broken through the dreaded sixth place, how he had now entered the ranks they kept passing around among themselves. But when his gaze landed on , his face imdiately beca awkward.
“I an, it’s my first ti getting sixth place in the whole school. It might not an much to you…”
His face was full of embarrassnt.
I smiled in response, putting on my kindest face and laughed.
“Congratulations.”
Even though I had fallen.
I didn’t look back, but my mind was completely focused on Go Yohan, sitting all the way at the back.
Frustration bubbled up.
It was all because of that bastard.
Yeah, the reason I got first place last ti was because I had built it up with my grades when I was still able to focus. But this ti? It was because Go Yohan ruined everything. My concentration had been off ever since the previous exam, so it was natural that I ssed up this ti.
Yeah. It’s all because of that bastard.
The deeper I thought about it, the more my resentnt exploded. And anwhile, in front of , Park Haon was shalessly staring at his score, flaunting it as if it were the greatest achievent.
“Damn, seriously… Who dropped this ti? I don’t even know, but thanks, man. This feels fucking amazing. Sixth place…”
I was in twelfth place for the first ti in the whole school.
Fucking hell.
I was smiling, but my pride was being devoured from the inside out. I could feel it tearing apart. But I didn’t want to congratulate him, and I didn’t want to give in to my jealousy either, so I stayed silent.
“Go Yohan.”
There was no answer.
Only the heavy scraping sound of a chair being moved.
Then ca the thud of footsteps, and I could feel a faint breeze as it passed by .
I lifted my head—
There he was, standing in front of , his broad back filling my field of view.
Maybe my eyes were filled with resentnt.
Maybe my vision was a bit blurry, maybe I had tears in my eyes.
But no. I wouldn’t let myself cry.
I couldn’t do sothing that pathetic.
“Yohan, let’s try a little harder next ti,” the teacher suddenly said.
What did that even an?
Did he say it because Yohan’s grades went up, so now he should keep trying harder? Or did he say it because Yohan ssed up, telling him to be more careful next ti?
Then why the hell didn’t I get those words?
My fists clenched tightly, the frustration building inside , choking .
And then—
The source of all my anger appeared right in front of .
Two fingers—index and middle—tapped lightly against my desk.
I didn’t want to look up. I didn’t.
But my gaze moved up on its own.
Go Yohan gave a kind, almost gentle smile.
And then he silently mouthed—
“Congrats on first place.”
And for the first ti in my life, I felt like I wanted to kill Go Yohan.
****
But I didn’t.
Let be clear.
Not couldn’t—
But didn’t.
How could a fox kill a tiger?
“Goddamn it.”
I skipped the cram school.
What was the point? They would just bombard with more worries about grades and nonsense.
And honestly, I had already given up on my grades.
The third year’s final sester grades? Who cares?
My long academic journey ended with twelfth place.
And Go Yohan, the one who ruined it all—
I couldn’t stand the thought of walking ho with him today.
So I lied.
“I’m going to cram school first,” I said.
But cram school? Yeah, right.
I sent Go Yohan off with a pleasant smile—
Then turned back to school.
Now, I was standing in front of the art room.
I was here for revenge.
And to make a rational choice.
Shin Jaehyun was the perfect candidate for this.
If I switched to Shin Jaehyun, Go Yohan would be left to experience the agony of unrequited love.
Let him feel what it’s like to suffer.
No one knew that pain better than I did.
And there was nothing sweeter than building my success on his suffering.
…
What a pathetic thought.
Yohan wouldn’t even care.
Weaklings like just escape reality by making up fantasies.
“Hah…”
I sighed, consciously taking a deep breath.
From what I’d heard, Shin Jaehyun often stayed in the art room after class.
To my surprise, it was Lee Yeonwoo—the guy who was practically invisible to everyone—who had given that information.
“Ugh… What the hell am I going to say?”
I scratched my head in frustration.
Maybe I’d say sothing harmless, like I hadn’t talked to him much lately.
It was a safe excuse.
Decision made.
I wasn’t hesitating anymore.
I threw open the door—
And there he was—
Shin Jaehyun, sitting at his desk, staring at his phone.
“…”
Our eyes t instantly.
Jaehyun quickly set his phone aside—
But the awkward tension only thickened.
Since I had the most to gain from this, it was up to to break the silence first.
****
Nonetheless, I didn’t kill Go Yohan.
To be exact, it wasn’t that I didn’t—it’s that I couldn’t. How could a fox kill a tiger?
“Damn.”
I skipped cram school. Going there today would only lead to pointless worry about grades, so what’s the point? Besides, I had already given up on my grades. I didn’t need them for my last sester of high school anyway. My long journey of grades ended with just twelfth place in the whole school. I hated Go Yohan for making this happen so much that I deliberately didn’t walk ho with him. I just lied.
“I’m going to cram school first.”
But cram school? Nah, I sent Go Yohan off with a fake, sympathetic smile, then turned back to school. And now, I was standing in front of the art room. I was dreaming of revenge. And making a rational choice. Shin Jaehyun was the perfect person for this. If I switched to Shin Jaehyun, Go Yohan would be left to fall in love from afar, right? No one understands the pain of unrequited love better than I do. My tornt would align perfectly with my success.
...What kind of nonsense was I thinking? Go Yohan probably wouldn’t be affected anyway. Weaklings like always escape reality with fantasies like this.
“Hah.”
I unconsciously took a deep breath. From what I heard from the others, Shin Jaehyun often cos to this room even after class. He was probably here today too. Surprisingly, the one who gave this information was Lee Yeonwoo, the one nobody even notices.
“Ugh, what the hell am I supposed to say?”
Scratching my head in frustration, I decided to use the excuse that I haven’t talked much lately and that I felt a bit lonely. Whatever works. With a decision made, I moved decisively. I barged into the room and, sure enough, Shin Jaehyun was there. Sitting at his desk, looking at his phone.
“...”
Our eyes t naturally, and Shin Jaehyun quickly set his phone down. But the awkwardness didn’t go away. It seed that, since I had the most to gain, it was up to to break the silence, so I spoke first.
“Hey.”
“Uh... hey.”
“You were here.”
“Yeah.”
Shin Jaehyun smiled slightly and tapped the book on his desk lightly as he spoke.
“It’s better here than at ho. The atmosphere is nicer.”
What a show-off. I had been mocking him in my head, but I just answered with a laugh and let it go. I needed to keep the conversation going.
“Actually, I ca here to see you.”
At those words, Shin Jaehyun’s eyes widened in surprise.
“?”
“Yeah.”
“Why all of a sudden?”
“Why do you ask?”
Without even waiting for Shin Jaehyun’s permission, I stepped into the art room and closed the door behind . It felt completely natural. No emotion, no hesitation, everything went smoothly. I even tossed my bag aside and spoke nonchalantly.
“It’s because of you.”
“? Because of ?”
I must have made a mistake. Shin Jaehyun reacted in a way I didn’t expect. He widened his eyes and started stuttering while pointing at himself. His reaction was so unexpected that I was the one caught off guard.
“No, it’s just that I wanted to see you. I just wanted to talk alone.”
“You wanted to see ?”
Once again, things went off-track. His reaction was strange. He seed so flustered that it made feel flustered too.
“No, that’s not it. It’s because you helped last ti, so I wanted to thank you.”
“...”
“Uh... I ant that I wanted to get closer to you.”
My mouth opened and closed slowly. I just stood there, waving my hands around awkwardly, unable to find the words. After a long pause, Shin Jaehyun rubbed the back of his neck, chuckling nervously, his face turning red as he awkwardly laughed.
What the hell is this? Why is he laughing like that? It was so absurd that I found myself laughing along with him in that awkward mont.
“Hahaha…”
The awkward laughter lingered intensely.
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