A conversation I once overheard in the classroom resurfaced in my mind.
"Doesn't it look kinda cool when a friend confidently punches in the door code at another friend's house?"
What kind of bullshit was that?
"No, seriously. Like, when I asked where to throw my trash, and he just took it and tossed it in the bin without a word—it looked kinda badass. Like soone who’s mastered sothing."
Back then, I thought it was the dumbest thing I’d ever heard. But now… I kind of understood. That subtle feeling. So this was what they ant.
I pressed my palm against my chest without thinking.
Go Yohan led to the dining room and pulled out a chair.
“Sit here.”
“Oh, uh, okay.”
I awkwardly moved my stiff body and sat down.
Naturally, I expected him to sit across from —but instead, he walked into the kitchen without hesitation.
Was he going to ask the housekeeper? I figured he’d be back soon and waited, but he was taking longer than I expected.
Left alone, boredom crept in, so I stood up. After checking to make sure no one was around, I moved toward the kitchen.
And then—I saw sothing shocking.
“…Huh?”
Go Yohan was taking dishes out of the cabinet. The braised short ribs were already plated, steam rising inside a transparent dish.
At first, I was just watching without thinking. But the mont it clicked—I was stunned.
He plated that himself? Go Yohan did?
I kept watching. He even took side dishes out of the fridge and set them out one by one.
…Go Yohan, serving rice with his own hands?
The contrast between his fluid movents and the unpredictable arrogance I was used to seeing at school completely threw off.
His fingers were red from the cold tap water. Since he hadn’t wiped them properly, the moisture caught the kitchen light, making them look even redder. The whole situation was so awkward I thought I’d suffocate.
In the end, I couldn’t handle the strange tension.
I hovered near the kitchen before blurting out, “Need help?”
Go Yohan’s head snapped up. It wasn’t until then that he seed to realize I was standing there. His usually narrow eyes widened slightly.
And then—guilt.
I don’t know why, but I felt guilty just looking at his expression.
His pale face turned red. Almost like he was embarrassed.
“No, just go.”
Why the hell did he look at like that? Like I’d done sothing wrong.
“Oh? Uh, okay.”
I had been about to say, Sorry, but I bit my lip and held back. What the hell did I have to apologize for? I didn’t do anything wrong.
Since I had nothing else to say, I turned and left the kitchen.
For so reason, the chair I had been sitting in looked out of place. It wasn’t sothing I had noticed before, but now it stuck out—just slightly askew while the rest were neatly arranged around the square dining table.
“…”
I glanced back at the kitchen.
Dishes clinked as Go Yohan continued his work.
The sound seed to tell to sit down and wait.
Should I? Or should I stay with him?
I had no experience with a situation like this, so I wasn’t sure.
In the end, I hesitated, then sat back down in the slightly crooked chair.
I listened to the soft noise of cutlery clattering while I waited for him.
His flushed face was still vivid in my mind.
He was just plating food—so why had he looked so ashad?
The guilt that had settled over still hadn’t gone away.
I glanced around and saw a glass and a bottle in the center of the table.
“…Might as well do sothing.”
I wanted to be doing sothing.
I grabbed the water bottle and two glasses.
Pouring the water halfway into each, I placed one in front of my seat and the other across from .
I only poured half a glass for him.
Just in case he didn’t drink it.
By the ti I set the glasses down and returned to my seat, Go Yohan had erged from the kitchen.
He carried a tray packed with small dishes and set it on the table. Rubbing his chin, he let out a small laugh.
“I was just setting up a quick al for you. That’s all.”
“…Right.”
For so reason, it sounded like an excuse.
At least, that’s how it ca across to .
I pretended not to notice and helped move the smaller dishes from the tray onto the table.
“I’ll handle the small ones. Do whatever else you need to do.”
As I spoke, I stole a glance at him.
Go Yohan pursed his lips, then spun around.
He returned with the rice bowl and the dish of braised short ribs.
I adjusted the plates on the table to make space, and Go Yohan, noticing, placed the dish down in the spot I had cleared.
“Thanks.”
This ti, I looked at him directly as I spoke.
Then, I sat down in the slightly out-of-place chair again.
As soon as I did, my stomach growled, reminding of my hunger.
“Thanks for the food.”
At my words, Go Yohan—who had just been standing there staring at —let out a dry laugh.
What’s with him?
Finding his reaction weird, I casually rested my hand on the table.
But—nothing was there.
Confused, I absentmindedly ran my fingers along the surface.
Go Yohan looked at now like I was so fascinating specin.
Annoyed by his stare, I frowned.
“What?”
“…Were you planning to eat with your hands?”
That’s when I realized what I had been looking for without thinking.
Oh. Chopsticks.
“Hold on. I’ll get them.”
So that’s why he hadn’t sat down yet.
The confusion lted away, leaving only embarrassnt.
I cleared my throat awkwardly.
Laughter erupted from the kitchen.
My face burned.
Not long after, Go Yohan returned, holding a pair of chopsticks in one hand and a spoon in the other, waving them like a prize.
The way he did it—like he was teasing —made pout.
“Stop it. Don’t make fun of .”
“Wow. Who knew our Jun was secretly Indian?”
“Ah, fuck off.”
He placed the utensils next to my rice bowl.
I made a point of grabbing the chopsticks with an exaggerated motion.
“…I poured you so water.”
“Oh? Yeah?”
Go Yohan turned his head to look at the seat across from . I glanced at him, then back down at my bowl of rice. Steam was rising from the fluffy white grains. The way the rice was plated was surprisingly neat—not like Go Yohan at all. Just as I picked up a bite and brought it to my mouth, I heard the sound of a chair moving.
But it wasn’t the chair across from .
The sound was closer.
I lifted my head with the rice still in my mouth. When I looked to the side, I saw Go Yohan sitting down right next to , watching eat.
In one hand, he was holding the cup of water I had poured.
The one I had placed across from .
He had gone out of his way to pick up that specific cup and move to my side instead.
For so reason, I found that strangely cute.
I couldn’t even chew properly, and when I smiled, he scolded .
“Chew first. Then smile.”
“Yeah, yeah, I got it.”
I popped a side dish into my mouth and started chewing.
After swallowing, I finally admitted:
“…It’s good.”
“Of course. Our housekeeper is really good at cooking.”
“She sounds pretty young. She’s got so serious skills.”
“Young? She’s in her late fifties.”
“What? Really? She sounded younger when she answered the intercom.”
Go Yohan furrowed his brow, drinking his water. A giant question mark might as well have been floating inside his eyes.
After finishing his drink, he placed the cup down and asked,
“When did you hear the housekeeper’s voice?”
“When I rang the intercom earlier. The person who answered.”
I gestured toward the front entrance with my chin.
“That wasn’t the housekeeper?”
But instead of agreeing, Go Yohan scowled. Holding the water cup in one hand, he shook his head.
“No.”
“Then who was it?”
“…Just soone.”
He raised his cup again, but instead of drinking, he muttered into it:
“Total bitch.”
Even though he had only mumbled the words, the sound echoed loudly off the cup, making them clear as day.
A total bitch?
I suddenly wanted to know more about whoever this was. But the look in Go Yohan’s eyes wasn’t good.
This wasn’t the ti to pry.
Better to drop it.
He set his cup down on the table. The lacquered wood swallowed the noise, making it barely a whisper. Crossing his arms, he leaned against the edge of the table and turned to .
“So, what’s your plan after eating?”
I didn’t answer right away because my mouth was full.
I just kept chewing, eting his gaze.
Go Yohan nodded slightly, watching eat in silence.
“….”
Why was he staring at like that?
I averted my eyes. It was making uncomfortable.
Only after swallowing did I finally respond—without looking at him.
“As soon as my phone charges, I’ll ask my parents for help.”
“They’re overseas, though.”
“They wouldn’t have taken the spare key with them. They must have left it with soone.”
“Ohh.”
Go Yohan touched his chin and nodded.
“But you’re usually so thorough. How’d you forget your key?”
I shoved more rice into my mouth and glared at him.
Because of you, dumbass.
You.
You’re the one who’s been ssing with my head, and now you’re acting like nothing’s wrong? That blank, brooding expression—what the hell is he always thinking about?
Honestly, I really wanted to ask.
You saw fighting with Han Junwoo that night, didn’t you?
Then why didn’t you say anything?
If it ca out that I liked guys, would you throw away just like he did?
Are we even really friends?
Or do you just see as a useful sidekick, like Junwoo did?
If I wasn’t stuffing food into my mouth, I might have actually asked him.
I was so frustrated I could barely stand it.
But I knew I couldn’t ask.
So instead, I just kept shoving food into my mouth without even chewing properly.
“What’s with the glare?”
“…”
“Slow down. You’ll choke.”
Go Yohan flicked his eyebrow up.
And sure enough, I did choke.
A lump of food got stuck in my throat, and it felt like my collarbone was locking up. The stabbing pressure made clutch my chest and cough.
Without hesitation, Go Yohan got up halfway and grabbed his water cup—shoving it right against my lips.
The cold rim of the glass pressed against my mouth, catching off guard.
Wait…
This wasn’t even my cup.
Isn’t this kind of… over the top?
“Drink it. I told you to eat slower.”
With his other hand, he gave my back a few firm pats.
With no choice, I gulped down the water being forced into my mouth.
After drinking enough, I pulled back, dodging his hand.
Go Yohan’s kindness was better than Han Junwoo’s toxic possessiveness, but sotis…
It made nervous.
Kindness could be a poison, too.
At least for .
Go Yohan’s hand hovered in the air after I pulled away.
He had been mid-motion, about to pat my back again.
His eyebrow flicked up a second ti.
“What?”
But before he could finish speaking, his cold gaze suddenly shifted behind .
I instinctively turned my head.
“….”
There was a girl standing there.
She looked about middle school age.
Long, sharp eyes. Thin double eyelids. A cold expression. Pale skin. And a condescending look on her face.
Suddenly, I rembered sothing Go Yohan had said before.
“No, I’m the second child. Middle of three. I have an older brother and a younger sister.”
Go Yohan’s father must have so ridiculously strong genes.
The girl’s eyes were full of disdain.
And her gaze was directed at us.
I turned back to Go Yohan.
His expression was shocking.
The arrogant Go Yohan had his head slightly bowed, eyes downcast.
Was it just my imagination?
Or… did he look miserable?
Why was he making that face?
Seeing that fragile expression on him made feel like shit.
I hated it.
Why was he looking like that?
I couldn’t understand. I couldn’t accept it.
The girl walked past us without a word, completely ignoring him.
Ignoring Go Yohan.
His own sister.
An oppressive silence filled the room.
Without thinking, I clenched and unclenched my fists.
Then, on impulse, I turned toward the girl and called out:
“Hey.”
She stopped walking and looked back.
I gave a small smile and waved.
“You’re Yohan’s sister, right? I’m his friend.”
Honestly, I didn’t give a shit if she just kept walking.
But that look on Go Yohan’s face…
It bothered .
And I didn’t want to see him get ignored.
The girl slowly looked up and down.
There was sothing eerily familiar about the way she looked at .
I had seen that gaze sowhere before.
Was it the way Go Yohan’s father had looked at ?
Similar, but not quite.
No—this was from even further back.
When our eyes t, it suddenly hit .
The first ti I ever saw Go Yohan in the cafeteria during our first year of high school.
I nearly burst out laughing from the sheer familiarity of it.
He had been such an asshole back then.
Rembering the way he had stood there, all smug and unreadable, made my eyes crinkle with amusent.
Go Yohan’s sister raised her eyebrow slightly.
So that habit ran in the family, huh?
Fascinating.
“You two go to the sa school?” she asked.
“Yeah.”
I smiled in the most harmless, innocent way I could manage.
But instead of responding in kind, Go Yohan’s sister scoffed.
“You must be a real dumbass too.”
Then she turned on her heel and headed toward the kitchen.
She mumbled sothing as she passed, just loud enough that I wasn’t sure whether I was ant to hear it or not.
"What’s the point of having a decent face."
Her voice trailed off as she disappeared into the kitchen.
I felt like I had just been smacked upside the head.
Completely stunned, I let out a short, breathless laugh.
I was so caught off guard that I had no words.
I was still reeling when I heard a strange sound nearby.
A stifled snicker.
“Kh-hmp.”
I turned and saw Go Yohan, his head bowed, shoulders trembling slightly.
…The hell?
Was he crying?
Panicked, I hesitated before cautiously placing a hand on his back.
But sothing felt off about the way he was sniffling.
Just as I was about to speak, Go Yohan suddenly jerked his head up.
“Ah, fuck—!”
There was no sadness on his face.
Only pure amusent.
“…Are you laughing?”
“I can’t help it. Seeing you get called a dumbass was hilarious.”
Face crinkled in laughter, he wiped the corners of his eyes and grinned.
“Don’t take it too hard. Gorosa is always like that. Think of it as a little nto. I an, when else in your life will you ever be treated like an idiot?”
“I don’t care. It’s just sothing a kid said.”
“Yeah, yeah.”
His large hand patted my back lightly.
Like he was comforting .
Not that I needed it.
I shot him a half-lidded glare.
But…
Her na was weird.
“Wait. Your sister’s na is Gorosa?”
“Yeah. Her baptismal na is Rosa. Go Rosa.”
He scoffed. “Weird, right? Who nas their kid that?”
You’re in no position to be laughing at other people’s nas.
Shaking my head at his immaturity, I heard the sound of sothing closing in the kitchen.
Probably the fridge.
Sure enough, when I glanced over, Go Rosa was standing there, holding a drink.
She scowled at Go Yohan, then wordlessly walked past us again.
But instead of getting mad, Go Yohan simply turned blank-faced.
That expression of his…
It bothered .
It wasn’t the kind of face you made when you were looking down on soone.
It was the face of soone who was looking at sothing… unattainable.
I bit my lip.
Then I turned and called out to her.
“Rosa.”
Go Rosa stopped in her tracks.
“…Am I good-looking?”
“No.”
She added flatly, “You’re ugly.”
Wait a damn minute.
Didn’t she just say I was decent-looking earlier?
This was completely inconsistent.
“Really? My bad, I must’ve misheard you.”
“…”
But Go Rosa just stood there, silent.
I tilted my head and looked up at her, blinking slowly, flashing my gentlest smile.
“…What?”
“You’re not that ugly.”
“Oh, good. I was actually a little hurt.”
A brief silence stretched between us.
I didn’t say anything.
I waited.
I believed that in monts like this, the one who spoke first was the one who lost.
And by my definition—she lost.
“…Hey.”
“Hm?”
“I have so advice for you.”
Her expression twisted slightly in irritation.
“Don’t get too close to him.”
She gestured at Go Yohan with her chin.
“You don’t want to end up like him.”
Then, without waiting for a response, she turned and left the dining room.
I blinked.
The fuck is her deal?
Shaking my head, I turned back toward the food.
I was about to pick up my chopsticks when I felt a sharp stare on .
I looked up.
Go Yohan was hiding his mouth behind his hand, shaking with laughter.
My heart dropped again.
He leaned in slightly, close enough that only I could hear his whisper.
“Hey. I think she likes you.”
But for so reason…
Even though he was smiling—
His face looked so sad.
There was no way he actually ant what he was saying.
I just stared at him in silence.
Feeling awkward, he scratched his chin and muttered—
“…But man, isn’t she a total bitch?”
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