[Pfft, who would’ve guessed? Minister Li, such a grown man, eats wontons but only eats the filling?]
The Minister’s face flushed red. “Ahem, let’s get back on topic. To be brief, the reason I had you board the carriage is because of that examinee’s situation. His Majesty wants us to negotiate with him and see if he’s willing to voluntarily change his ancestral records at the yan before the imperial examination begins.”
Xu Yanmiao replied diplomatically, “That might be a bit difficult.”
But in his heart, he wasn’t so restrained: [Going to soone’s house to say, ‘Can you change your ancestry?’ Are you asking to be kicked out? The old emperor sure knows how to make life hard for people.]
“Hmph! What’s so difficult about that? Xu, my boy, you simply lack experience. Let tell you, there’s hardly anything in this world that can’t be done!”
The Minister of War’s eyes lit up with determination. “Co on! Let’s finish this quickly so we can set aside ti to finalize the exam questions. I’ve already drafted two questions on the Four Books, and three on the Five Classics. Now, aside from one more question each on the Four Books and Five Classics, there’s still an essay topic, five judgnts… what else was there?”
Xu Yanmiao added with a numb expression, “An edict, decree, and morial each need one question, and five essay topics are required. Among them, I’m the only one who can draft the essay topic, and you’re the only one allowed to create the morial question. For the essay topics, I’ll draft three, and you’ll write five.”
The rest would be a collaborative effort between the two.
The Minister of War clicked his tongue. “I’ve been so busy lately that my mind’s gone blank. I can’t rember anything.” He then glanced at Xu Yanmiao. “Do you rember that examinee’s na?”
Xu Yanmiao thought for a mont. “His na is Gao He. ‘He’ as in congratulations. He’s from Lan County in the Lin Tao Prefecture of Shaanxi.”
“What’s his financial situation?”
“From a poor family.”
The undercover agents had done so work; otherwise, Xu Yanmiao wouldn’t have been able to manage the situation so smoothly. He pondered briefly and added, “The agents visited his ho. It’s a mud-brick house with a thatched roof. When they arrived, his mother was arguing with another family in the village over the ownership of a pile of cow dung on the road.”
The Minister of War smiled nostalgically. “You don’t understand. A pile of cow dung can boil a whole pot of porridge.”
Xu Yanmiao: “?”
The mont the Minister saw Xu Yanmiao’s expression, he realized he had said sothing odd and hurried to clarify, “The cow dung is for…”
But Xu Yanmiao was already shocked beyond words. [I’ve only ever heard of cow-stomach hot pot, and that was challenging enough to accept. But cow-dung porridge? Isn’t that a bit too ahead of its ti…?]
The Minister of War: “…” He was equally stunned, but he managed to finish his explanation out of sheer inertia. “It’s used as fuel.”
Xu Yanmiao: “…”
The Minister of War: “…”
The two exchanged a look, each feeling their own awkwardness. Then the Minister of War, now expressionless, changed the subject. “In that case, just give him enough money.”
“Huh?”
“For poor families, how much is an ancestor worth, really? Besides, it’s not even his real ancestor.”
“But he’s a scholar. Isn’t it said that scholars won’t bow for five bushels of rice?”
The Minister of War scoffed. “Five bushels of rice can feed a person for a whole month.”
The carriage left the city and arrived at the temple where Gao He was staying. When they found him, he was using a charcoal stick to write on the ground.
“Confucius said: ‘The commander of an army can be overthrown, but the will of a commoner cannot be taken away…’”
Xu Yanmiao and the Minister of War exchanged glances, each seeing a trace of hesitation in the other’s eyes.
[From the looks of it, this guy really might not bend for five bushels of rice.]
[But using imperial power to pressure him… isn’t that kind of inappropriate?]
More than inappropriate! It would be utterly humiliating!
The Minister of War stomped his foot and strode forward.
Gao He looked up in confusion. “Who might you two be?”
The Minister of War replied, “My surna is Li. I’ve co today to discuss sothing with you. Could we borrow a mont of your ti?”
Gao He nodded, leading them into the house. He brought out chairs, fetched a bundle from the top of a cupboard, and took out a small handful of poor-quality tea leaves from a cloth-wrapped package tied with string. He brewed tea for the two guests. “What business brings you two here?”
The Minister of War got straight to the point. “A friend of mine claims descent from the eldest prince of the State of Yu. However, he no longer wishes to acknowledge the connection.”
Gao He raised an eyebrow slightly. “This… might not be appropriate. Matters concerning one’s ancestors cannot be abandoned lightly.”
The Minister of War then explained that Gao He’s supposed ancestor wasn’t actually his real ancestor.
Gao He replied, “It seems your friend isn’t a legitimate descendant either. If that’s the case, why is it I who should and the records?”
The Minister of War’s expression grew serious.
It seed the mont had co for silver to take the stage. Whether they succeeded or not would depend on whether the silver was plentiful enough and convincing enough.
“Clink—”
A silver ingot the size of a fist was placed on the table.
Gao He frowned. “What is the aning of this?”
The Minister of War said, “I understand this matter is quite difficult. Consider this silver as compensation. I ask for your cooperation.”
Gao He exclaid loudly, “What do you take for, sir? Even if the royal family of Yu isn’t truly my ancestors, I’ve worshipped them for so many years that I genuinely consider them as such in my heart. How can sothing so sacred be traded for re money? This is an insult to scholars everywhere!”
“Clink—”
The Minister of War placed a second silver ingot on the table, just as large as the first.
The two gleaming lumps of silver sparkled in the sunlight, exuding the irresistible aroma of wealth.
“Please forgive , but my friend is adamant about claiming this ancestor. I must ask for your understanding.”
Gao He grew even angrier. “I am a scholar! Do you think I would abandon my heritage for just two pieces of silver? This is an insult to my honor!”
The Minister of War’s pupils trembled.
Could it be that he had underestimated this man…?
Xu Yanmiao quietly thought: […Should we offer more money?]
Gao He, righteous and indignant, declared, “You should offer more money!”
Confucius said: ‘The commander of an army can be overthrown, but the will of a commoner cannot be taken away.’
— The AnalectsThe “add more money” joke originates from Brotherhood of Blades.
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