Chapter 99: Soul
William held the massive doors open for her to pass through first, then started heading down the corridor and leading her back towards her apartnts.
Camilla walked a little behind him in silence, rerunning the conversation with King Edward in her head, unable to stop dwelling on the roar of his shouting and the rage etched on his face.
William was quiet as well. It was only when they turned the corner and entered a narrow back corridor that he finally stopped walking and turned around to face her. He had a small smile on his face. "Well, that didn’t go so badly. I an, he was angry and all but he then-"
He quickly stopped talking in surprise when Camilla launched herself at him, pushing him up against a wall. Her cheeks were pink and her eyes sparked with fury.
"How can you say that after what you did?" she shrieked, shoving him and then pounding on his chest with her small fists in frustration. "How could you just provoke his anger and take that kind of risk with both of us? He nearly shut
away in a nunnery! He-"
"Yes, but he didn’t! He didn’t!" William gasped as he tried to catch her flailing fists in his hands. "You won’t be shut away and I won’t be exiled. I knew the king wouldn’t be best pleased with the idea of sothing secretly going on behind his back. But I also knew he’d calm down when he saw the advantages of our union. He’s a strategist above all."
"So you already had all this thought out. You planned all of this and deliberately refused to tell , didn’t you?" Camilla’s voice was an accusatory hiss. "Your claim to have run out of ti to tell
what you had in mind before we reached the king’s chambers...that was a lie! You never had any intention of telling , did you? You wanted
to walk into that room completely blind!"
William had the grace to look abashed. "Well, yes but...I knew it would less risky if you went in there innocently. My uncle...he hates being made a fool of. If he thought this was sothing we’d been planning together behind his back for a while, he would’ve never agreed."
He winced and cupped her swinging fists in his much larger hands. "I know him better than you do! I knew that having him pin the bla mostly on
rather than on both of us, was a safer bet."
"And what if I’d unknowingly said the wrong thing in there?" Camilla challenged him.
"I thought there was a fairly low chance of that and if you did, he’d probably forgive you. He has a soft spot for innocent maidens, you see." William mumbled. He started to let go of her fists, then thought better of it when he saw she was still wild with anger. "And look, I was right." he added feebly.
Camilla shrieked, "Are you out of your mind? What made you think you had the right to make these decisions about my life without even talking to
beforehand?"
She pulled her fists out of his grasp and saw the sapphire ring. It made her even more furious. She slid the ring off her finger and shoved it blindly into his hand, not caring if he caught it in his grasp or not. "Now that you’ve used this to trick your king, you can have it back. I have no use for it."
Camilla then tore off down the corridor, terrified she was going to burst into tears. She didn’t want to cry when she was so angry.
William strode after her, grabbing her shoulder so she was forced to face him. "Look, I’m sorry I had to drag you unaware in front of my uncle. But I gave you my word that I’d find a way for you to stay in Islia, didn’t I? As my wife, your future is secured."
Camilla knew he was trying to sound reassuring but it just made her feel worse. Like a worthless burden, or a problem he’d been lumped with fixing. She could feel tears welling so she quickly looked down.
"I do want to stay, but not like this." she choked out.
When she peeped up at him, William’s forehead was creased. There was confusion on his face but also sothing else. If she didn’t know any better, she’d have thought it was vulnerability.
"What do you an?" His voice cracked.
"I an, I don’t want you marrying
out of pity. It’s not sothing I think I can live with." Camilla’s voice was sounding increasingly strangled as she tried hard to restrain the tears, much to her horror. "I appreciate you trying to help
but...I don’t want you to end up resenting ."
"Wait, what? Did you just say pity?" William’s jaw dropped. "You think that’s why I’ve done all this?"
Camilla refused to open her mouth, knowing if she did, she’d start sobbing over how deep her feelings ran for the beautiful, infuriating, cocky young man. And he wouldn’t understand at all. She’d rather return to Moraigth in disgrace than stay in Islia as his pity project.
He cursed, then brought both hands to his head, pulling at handfuls of his hair in dismay. He sighed and said, "Well, I suppose I’m to bla for that. I know I’m not good with words." His throat bobbed as he swallowed repeatedly. "So I guess I need to try harder."
William then took her face into both of his hands, gently cradling her jaw so she had to look up at him. His voice was oddly gravelly when he spoke again.
"Listen to . I’d never offer to marry soone out of pity, even if it ant saving their life." He snickered. "My nature is too selfish for that kind of gesture."
Camilla stood there blinking wordlessly when he suddenly dropped from view. She quickly looked down to find him on one knee, holding her hands in his and staring up at her.
"I want to marry you, uh...because...I’m in love with you." His throat bobbed again. "I am just so painfully in love with you."
Camilla was sure she was hallucinating. This wasn’t happening. "When...?" she managed to get out.
"I don’t know." William shrugged, looking self conscious. "I don’t know exactly when it happened...but I think it was quite a while ago. It’s sothing I’ve been fighting and trying to deny for so ti. But I can’t talk myself out of it anymore and lord knows I’ve tried. You’re...you’re in my soul, Camilla. I need you."
"You really an this?" Camilla started to shake. She felt his warm fingers squeezing hers.
"Yes." His gaze was direct and he gave her a half smile that nearly made her lt into a puddle. "This is certainly not what I was expecting to happen but it has. You truly, genuinely make
happy. These last few weeks where we didn’t speak..." William took a deep, shuddering breath. "I missed you so fucking badly."
Camilla tried to speak but all that ca out was a faint squeak. She felt like an invisible fist was squeezing her heart.
William looked up at her with the expression of a hopeful child. "And I think, no, I’m fairly certain that you’re in love with
as well, aren’t you?"
Camilla slowly nodded and whispered, "Do you have to be so arrogant about it?"
William laughed, a genuine rry laugh. "I know. There have been plenty of tis when you’ve wanted to run
through with my own sword. But I want you with
all of my days. So will you please just marry ?"
Her voice was caught in her throat, swimming in a sea of overwhelming emotions. All she could do was rasp.
William looked up, slightly worried. "How long are you going to make
kneel? You will marry , won’t you? Or are you going to make
beg?"
"Yes, yes of course I’ll marry you." Camilla smiled shakily, unsure whether to laugh with joy or collapse in a sobbing heap on the stone floor.
William sprung up into a standing position and smiled back, opening his arms to her. It was a genuine smile, slightly shy. She eagerly threw her arms around him and he enfolded her in a warm, strong embrace. She took a deep breath, reveling in the feeling of safety and in the spicy, masculine scent of him. Squeezing him as hard as she could, she buried her face in his shoulder as she felt him run a hand through her loose hair.
She closed her eyes and murmured into his shoulder, knowing this mont would be seared into her mory forever.
William laughed softly. "What are you saying, pretty girl? I can’t understand you."
"I said that being with you like this, it feels like finding my way ho." Camilla whispered, then turned her face into his shoulder again.
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