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Chapter 7: Kick Your Ass In 9 Moves? by Harem-Fan
[Umm, That's the spot... M-Master, just wake uuuuuuup~!, That is right, touch ~]
I woke up and turned off that creepy alarm...
"Damn, that one seems a bit disturbing. Was that voice Momo Momozono? I used to like her, but now I realize she just sleeps with anyone, ew. My man's dreams have been crushed."
So yesterday, after my manly run down the mountain of sha, I ended up going to the electronic store.
I used up most of my savings on a nice computer... Well nice for this ti period.
Then I picked up around 40 books, including all 3 school years of main classes, and a few mind strengthening gas like chess to help practice my ntal training.
I was a bit dumb in my past life, so I wanted to put in so effort...
No really I'm now smart enough to know I was a borderline idiot.
Don't get wrong, I was smart in normal life matters, but damn who can rember the table of elents!?
And since the Student Council's office won't be open till Monday morning to get my shit straight... I will just camp at ho.
Then I will do so reading, research, and so daily exercise...
-
After 4 days of a hikikomori lifestyle...
Holy Crap, I could not stop!
I only wanted to do so learning and brush up on what the school would be teaching... But then 'It' happened!
My eyes and brain felt like a dry desert in a parched land, never seeing the joy of rain.
Then when the rain fell, and my world opened up, it felt like losing one's virginity!
When I got a taste of that sweet intellectual sexiness, I had to do it over and over like a rabbit in spring!
I was able to learn and morize all 3 school year books, from cover to cover, and learn many other subjects outside of high school as well.
Not only did I perfectly morize the material, but when the books were added together, it gave the ability to glimpse information that wasn't clearly written there.
I was able to learn things like... Sun-Sues Art of War, chess, go, art design, and many other fields that could be learned via books and computers!
Hell I was even able to crush the computer AI in master level chess, like bullying a kindergartner!
So ya, I actually finished learning in 3 days, but on the last day I signed up for an online popular first person shooter (FPS), with the ga-na... [Jesus Christ]
I found out I had supernatural hand and eye coordination, plus the ability to project paths of attack, even in a 2D ga?!
Well let's just say I got banned for too many complaints from players for cheating?!
I couldn't really prove them wrong, and admit I used magic or the like, right?
Personally, I'm sure 90% of those little bitches just had trauma from getting one-shot over and over again by a sniper called Jesus Christ!
So after cleaning up and starting a new day from my locked door cultivation, I headed down to finally eat breakfast with my parents...
-
My mother said with a bit of sarcasm in her voice.
"Your majesty has finally decided to grace us with your presence?"
Followed by my deadbeat father's snicker and comntary.
"Dear, don't be too hard on my Son. Mat is going to the most prestigious international academy in our Kuoh Town... Since this is the first year it has gone coed in its history, he has to do so manly preparations to clear his mind of all that beautiful scenery!"
Followed by a Master Roshi lecherous thumbs-up.
As my mother handed us our food, and sat down, she asked.
"Is what your handso and loving father said true, Son? Did you lock yourself up and release your inner-demons?"
She was obviously just trying to playfully tease at this point.
So I suddenly stood up from my chair, straightened my back, and declared!
"No mam! When I had my birthday, I did so soul searching of my life, and what I want to accomplish! I saw a sign when my computer exploded from too much pornography, and seeing the miserable life my only two friends have... I made a vow to give up porn forever! I learned that the girls in those movies and magazines aren't the type of girl I would be proud to bring ho to et my lovely mother!"
My bold and proud declaration was t with... silence, absolute silence.
My parents both had two very different looks on their faces at the mont.
My mother had this look like she saw a second head form on my shoulders.
While my father had the look of walking into his bedroom, seeing his wife servicing an entire football team at once.
I then sat back down in the awkward silence, and asked.
"Can soone please pass the butter?"
My father jumps to his feet, with his hands on the table, and shouts!
"It's a lie! You can't an this, right? You're my Son, and this is all we have together, don't leave !"
He lowers his voice into a pleading one...
"What can I do to change your mind? I know... How about I let you in the restricted area, and let you pick 10, even better 20 of any of the good stuff?"
Wow, he is actually crying, but I had to break it off clean, so I say proudly...
"I'm sorry father, it's not you, it's ... We have just grown apart, and I want to live a healthier, well mostly healthier life. If I continue down the path you have paved for , I'm confident I will be a very lonely man."
Well, seeing his [I just got NTR'd] face, I almost comforted him.
Then my mother said to ...
"I'm very proud of you, Son! I heard you have been doing so nice things lately too. For instance so of the other mothers in the neighborhood said you gave one of the neighbor girls a nice apology. Keep it up, Mom will support you."
She finished with an elegant smile on her face.
At that mont father stood from his chair again, leering over , and growled out.
"Brat, what's with that part of bringing girls ho to et your Mom? Why would you not introduce them to as well?"
"Sigh, Dad it doesn't matter to you. You will literally accept any woman I bring ho, duh..."
He then sat down with a nod, like he won the fight.
Mother then reminded .
"Get your school taken care of, as the ti limit is soon approaching."
I then said I would go after breakfast, and so I did...
-
I wore one of my nicer outfits today, knowing that I would be eting the ever popular foil to Rias, Sona Sitri.
I know she doesn't go by that na in school, but for the life of , I can't rember what it was?
Was her fake last na, Sona Shit-rye? (Mat is confusing so English Dub with Japanese in his mind.)
Why would anyone want a poop sounding last na?
Discarding my random thoughts, I formulated what I would be doing differently here.
First I'm not going to do stupid photography, just for porn.
I will join only 2 clubs now, my first is the Chess Club, because well D×D is all about chess, right?
And I found that no one should be able to beat in a ga, without cheating that is.
Second will be the Swimming Club, because I'm goddamn Aquaman, but cooler!
Plus I won't lie, girls in Japanese school swimsuits are super hot... I gave up porn, not looking at hot girls.
-
I now find myself standing at the gates of this vault of beautiful treasures...
I admire this prestigious Kuoh Academy, in all its 3D real world glory.
"Fuck its huge!"
Well it has to be, it is an international school with middle, high, and college all in one spacious institution.
The school year here in Japan is different than in the States.
The US has the school year split in half, with a long sumr, a winter and spring break that is very short.
But in Japan most schools actually have 3 blocks of school instead of just 2 of them.
The beginning of the school-year starts in April and is considered the start of a new grade level.
Between each of the 3 blocks is a 1 month vacation.
"Phew, That was one hell of a ntal recap for !"
After using the handy map app on my smartphone, I was able to find the Student Council's room without issue.
This is where students get the course and class assignnt, plus where school club activities, and many many more functions happen.
In this school however the real power isn't the Principal, who is just a figurehead for the Gremory Devils, but the Sitri Devils of the student council.
The door is open for the public, so I head in and observe what's going on...
-
So let's see who I recognize from either of my mories...
Nice, they are currently wearing na-tags... Crap, avert eyes from boobs damn it!
I can see Sona, sitting at the president's desk, and her na tag is um, ah that's it! [Souna Shitori]
Okay, I was wrong, it isn't poop!
And off to the desk on the side is her Queen... [Tsubaki Shinra]
Holy Cow, she is sooooooo much sexier in real life!
Wait, she has two different colors of eyes, heterochromia eyes, with a violet-left eye and a light-brown right eye!
Is that a Sacred Gear like mine? (Yes, her purple eye is her Mirror Alice.)
I can't rember what she had?
Able to pull my gaze away, I saw another girl by the na of... [Momo Hanakai]
Damn I don't rember her too well, she must be a sad mob like .
Hmm, And a girl with a warm and cozy look to her, she is... [Reya Kusaka]
And over there is an athletic looking girl, doing heavy lifting nad... [Tsubasa Yura]
If I rember right she falls for my friend, Issei, because he always gets his ass handed to him? She must love nursing wounded puppies or sothing?
And wait, where is that Black Dragon punk, with the frog tongue?
I think his na was Saji, um-mm ah ya, it's Saji Genshirou!
It would be embarrassing to forget him. I think he is kinda important, but he isn't in the Peerage yet. Oh~ya... its 1st year, right!
And finally, I don't see that troubleso little girl that acts like a yip-yip dog, I think she was, Nimura Ruruko?
It seems the other couple of naless mob students have got their uniforms and itineraries, so it's my turn...
I froze!
Oh, My God, who do I get helped by, they're all so cute, well half of them?
This is important!
I only get to do this one ti, so who do I choose?!
"Eeny, eny, miny, moe♪, Catch a tiger by the toe♫, If he hollers let him go♪, Eeny, eny, miny, moe♫, My mother told To pick the very best one and you are [not] it~♪!"
-
I walked up to the winner, and did my Friends impersonation...
"Hello Miss Tsubaki Shinra! How you do~in~?"
Nailed it Joey, thanks!
The beautiful Tsubaki gives a blank stare and asks.
"How may I help you, sir?"
Damn she is a block of ice!
"Cough, I'm Matsuda Tanaka and I ca for my uniforms, class itineraries, plus I would like to inquire about a club change."
I lost my goofy look, and gave out my business smile.
"I would like to change my Photography Club to Chess, due to being bad at caras, and the fact I'm the best chess player God has ever created! I would like to bring glory to my new school!"
She said professionally.
"Mr. Tanaka, we normally don't allow club transfers without just cause, so I will have to decline that. Try again next block."
Nope that won't work for .
I turned to the Student Council President and asked...
"Miss Souna Shitori, I have morized the school rules from beginning to end, and I wish to formally request your intervention in this. To prove my chess skill is a must for the school's reputation, I shall challenge VP Shinra to a tid ga of chess!"
I point to Tsubaki, and continue.
"If she is unable to play, due to lack of ability, I will allow any council mber to be her proxy! If I win, I get my transfer to the Chess Club, but if I lose, I won't bother the council this year and take pictures of grass for the year!"
Sona looks at her Queen, and the latter nods back, then Sona says...
"Okay, Mr. Tanaka you made a valid case, and I happen to have a board and tir here. We shall let the both of you play now under your agreent."
We all gather around the table...
-
A dozen minutes later...
Matsuda walked out of the office, whistling an unknown song, with a smile that makes you want to punch him.
As Matsuda left with his uniforms and itinerary, Tsubaki asked in a daze.
"What just happened?!"
Her King then replied, after pushing up her glasses, looking out the door.
"He kicked your ass in 9 moves, that's what happened."
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