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There were many things I didn’t know about goblins. One of them was that they never, ever, upheld their word.

All of the goblins expected that I’d follow all of my clothes in the pot.

But the chief... oh, he was licking the bowls and waving them as soon as there were no traces of the food left.

Grilled Cheese Sandwich grease was apparently sothing he wanted to die for.

I had no idea at that ti, but this was a goblin who was going to rewrite history. Goblin history, that is.

"We won’t eat him," he pointed at , then he waved his bowl at . Why he started to insist that I placed his sandwiches in bowls was beyond , but, hey, he wasn’t insisting that I finish the soup the goblins started cooking... with in it.

"No!" The goblins roared as one. "We eat!"

I blinked. The sll of my unwashed socks coming from the soup cauldron made cringe.

And yet, I had an idea!

"How about we all eat a bit of soup, and then we can talk again?" It was a bold move. A move I hadn’t prepared enough grilled cheese sandwiches for.

I was still at level one.

But I had Edda!

"You know, cheating is boring," she had no rcy in her black heart. But that was ok. I was ready to beg!

"Ok, how about this: I will be able to produce sothing that cos from the union of a goblin and a nymph soon... if you know what I an?"

Now, the chief goblin looked about as handso as a rotting potato, but I didn’t do it with Aron and Nate before I got the schemas.

Yeah, I knew by that point what had happened. That was a mana infusion. I just needed for the one I was infusing with mana to get enough in their system.

So, I could steal their biological imprint!

"That would be an ogre," I didn’t understand the logic behind that one. It should be a hobgoblin.

But, hey, ogres were bigger, faster, stronger...

"Dumber," Edda added the last one.

"The cheese will sort them out," I told her, as I made the final step towards sothing I was going to end up in if Edda didn’t help.

"You have only 100 mana points left," she told , and I nodded. "I can give you sothing, but it will be a 50-50 chance."

I blinked.

"The World Dungeon doesn’t like you," which was to be expected. Brandon and Pan were waging war against it.

To save Lexus the Nymph from ever being bound again. To free the World Tree.

"Then do it!" I was ready to run! But first I wanted to see what Edda had to offer.

"Huh?" Edda was a tar-hearted daughter of a...

The goblin chief was looking at the pair of dice in his hand. I looked at the direction from where I hoped I had co from.

Ok, even without boots I should still be able to outrun so goblins...

The goblin chief’s eyes t mine, he winked and threw the dice.

My heart went straight up my throat as the dice began to twirl in the air.

They were falling. A goblin was tugging at my arm, a knife in his hand.

Ready to cut up alive. Throw in as a bloody ss into sothing that used my dirty socks as a broth base.

The goblin chief caught the dice, holding up a hand.

"Fate will decide!" He yelled, as he began to glow.

"Aron!" I yelled because the knife was getting closer and closer to my naked skin. I was just in my underwear, darn it!

The goblin chief opened his hand. He slamd the dice on the ground.

"10!" The goblin, which was about to filet stopped, looking at the dice with narrowed eyes. "And 10!"

"Perfect Fortuna," the goblin threw the knife at a cutting board. It stuck in there, waving back and forth.

I fell on the ground. Dead to the world.

0000

When I woke, there was a muscular and handso man next to who... still looked like a goblin.

"You got the schema, by the way," Edda told . I saw the picture of the ogres, who looked strangely human. "Perfect Fortuna... darn, you married a gambler who knows how to cheat! This is the last ti I throw a die at him!"

"I want more food!" My new husband seed not to care about much else, but I was glad.

I sprang to my feet, took so bread, noticed that I was wearing my clothes once more, which were warm and dry, but slling of soup and socks, and I began to grill sandwiches again.

The goblins ate the soup, which might have been my final al as well.

Had the chief not cheated.

"So," I asked, as the fourth sandwich went the way of the dodo. "Why did you save ?"

It was a question I needed to ask. After all, if we were married now, I needed sothing to give as an excuse to Aron and Nate for, well, cheating.

"You cook well," was my only answer, before he started to wave his bowl at like the caveman he was.

I weighed the pros and cons of teaching him how to make his own sandwiches. My dear new husband bared his teeth at . Apparently, I was too slow.

Soon his bowl had another sandwich in it.

But I had a problem.

The goblin chief was a bottomless pit! I needed to make him sothing that would finally be enough!

I looked around. Oh, if I could only get my hands on a clay pot and an oven...

I blinked as I saw a wonder in a corner. So, as if it were summoned. The oven was old, and broken up, but it was already lit!

And the clay pot, which was resting a bit far off so that it wouldn’t end up breaking from the heat, looked big enough for the goblin chief!

"Honey, do you have at?" I asked him.

He took out a knife; I prepared to run.

But instead of him throwing the knife at , he threw it at the goblin, who nearly killed and dumped in the soup.

"Now I do!"

My hair was going to turn white before the end of the day! I needed a divorce!

And fast!

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