My plan was about as well-cooked as the porridge, which may or may not look like a sli. A toxic one.
But, hey, the army of the Necromantic Union was a sight to see! No living people to be seen!
If one did not count the vampires, who... seed to love the stuff I had brought in here to poison the enemy army.
How the bloody hoot are they even eating it, I asked myself, as I looked around with wide eyes. I brought the porridge just as the sun was rising.
The sun was up in the sky now.
The vampires were spooning porridge into themselves like mad!
"Sylvan," Desmond said, as he took a hold of my hand. "It would be for the best if we... went ho."
I did not understand. We were at war. What sort of ho did he have in mind?
"And hide behind a barrier," Nick said, as I felt him gathering the mana from the zombies under his command to get us out of here.
"Because Solas will skin us alive. Not you, dearest Sylvan," Nathaniel said, as he hugged from behind. "But us three, for following along with your plan. Then he will make you cook us for him."
I blinked. Well, that sounded like Solas, yes, but that did not an that it was going to happen!
"And then, dearest Sylvan," Nathaniel chuckled so, as if he were dood to die a slow and painful death.
I snorted.
What a drama queen!
"I will forever burn in Hell. But you... you will be turned to king Alexios," Nathaniel said, and then, just as said man got out of his tent, probably to see why his army, which should not be able to eat anything, was now eating, ca out.
Our eyes t; I blinked.
Wait! I knew this man! He tried to cut off a branch from thuselah once!
"You son of a..." I began to yell, for there was nothing worse in my eyes than soone stealing from my first tree.
The one tree which I loved the most!
The king blinked; I shook off the three Boliari off myself. Using my nymph mana to make sure they couldn’t drag to where their ho was.
"Do I know you?" the Lich asked, as he looked at a vampire, who was filling his bowl with porridge.
Green porridge.
"What is happening here?" The most dangerous man in the world asked his underling.
"This is better than blood! I have never felt this powerful before!" The vampire yelled.
I stopped, my blood freezing in my veins.
Oh, that was not good.
"Let try so," the king said. I did not try to stop him. After all, if I did try, he was probably going to eat .
He ate the porridge, licked his lips.
His eyes were shining a green light. I don’t rember what color they used to be, but now they were green.
Poisonously green.
I took a step back.
"I know this mana," he said so, as if he was going to sar chocolate on and chain up to a bed. "thuselah, dear, I always knew you were a living thing!"
At that mont I realized that this man, this Lich, had tried to hump a tree, not steal a branch.
I roared!
Nathaniel was by my side, that blonde git, and dragging away from the person who had attempted to do sothing so hideous to my dear tree.
But I was not about to just get out of here with my tail between my legs. I had co in here to take an army down!
So, I took a torch and threw it at a tent. It caught fire.
That was the mont I let Nathaniel teleport away.
0000
The ho of the three Boliari, as it turned out, was a castle. Very original of them, I had to think with a snide expression. How were they supposed to make sure that everyone feared them, I asked myself, if they were about as original as a toddler?
"Sylvan, do you know what you just did?" Nick asked, ever the more grounded to reality of the three.
"Yes! He wanted to take my father’s virtue!" I yelled.
All three blinked.
"I... you are a nymph, Sylvan. You do not have a father," Desmond said slowly so, as if I were retarded.
"No! I am speaking about my bristlecone pine tree! thuselah!" I yelled, as I began to pace.
At first, the war was just a human conflict.
Then my humans had managed to soften up my heart to the point that the fate of these 2,000 lost souls that Solas had managed to drag to the grave with him was sothing I cared about.
But if I had to be honest, it was all about the cooking. I loved cooking to the point I did not want to ever stop.
One did a lot of cooking when feeding an army.
But the war was sothing personal now! Oh, I did not know at that point of ti that the king had done worse things than getting drunk and humping a tree.
No matter how bad that was.
"I will defeat him!"
My roar made all three looked at so, as if they expected to turn into a Forest Demon. But I was not that kid, Pan.
My hormones were in check. I ate a healthy diet, after all.
"I am not like that," I told the three, as they began to look at so, as if I was going to order them to burn down a village.
"So..." Nathaniel asked, as he made a step towards . Oh, how I wanted for Aron to be here!
Because, as much as I hated to admit it, Nathaniel was pretty to look at. And now that Aron had opened my eyes to that fact that I was not a stone, I could admit it.
"I am not like that!" I ant that I will not cheat on Aron with Nate, but Nate just took it to an so, as if I did not like n.
That was just fine, I thought to myself, as he opened a bottle of sothing expensive.
Aron will surely explain things better than ... I hope.
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