The Trade Function.
It was unlocked when Raven collected 10,000 plot points.
At first, he was very excited, wondering what kind of interdinsional trading system it was.
He thought it would introduce him to other worlds with different magic and techniques, only to find a shocking result: it was nothing like that.
It turned out that the gods used this trade system.
They used it to trade goods among themselves.
Then it clicked to him: this system was supposed to be a device used by the gods.
What else could he expect from it?
It was a god’s smartphone turned into a system for him.
When he realized what the trade function actually did, Raven decided never to touch it.
He didn’t want to end up offending a god when he could still rember how he had died.
He could recall how their curses turned him into dust and how he would’ve been erased if not for that goddess.
’Fuck her, though.’
Yeah, he never missed a chance to curse her.
After all, everything he was going through was her fault. If she hadn’t been careless enough to drop her phone on Earth, he would never have gone through any of the things he had.
However, since this life was better than his past life, Raven had decided to let bygones be bygones.
As for the trade function, he would not use it.
Nothing would happen as long as he didn’t—that was what he had thought until one day, things changed.
That day, after training with Crisaius, he was looking through the daily store when he suddenly had a strange thought.
He decided to look through the trade channel.
’One look won’t do any harm,’ he had thought.
Oh, how wrong he was.
The mont he opened the channel, the screen flickered with activity.
Multiple chat rooms, dozens of weird usernas, items listed with absurd tags like [Blessed by the Sixth Sin] or [Cursed by My Ex].
"What the fuck?" He had muttered, his gaze fixed on the last one. "What kind of gods are these fuckers?"
They were... weird.
Raven, however, already had enough of such people in his life, and fearing that he might beco like them, he decided to close the channel quickly, only to freeze at the sound of a notification.
Ding!
[1 NEW SSAGE – Direct Chat]
"...Huh?" Raven tilted his head. "Direct chat?"
Without thinking, he had tapped it—the dumbest thing he could’ve done.
The screen had blinked once and expanded into a clean, minimalist chat window.
One ssage was waiting for him.
Raven had stared at it for a while before he shook his head.
"...Nope," he had said flatly and imdiately closed the chat.
He was NOT getting into casual small talk with so celestial codger nad Grandpa_Hot_Pot.
He already had one such person in his life; he didn’t need another.
But then—
Ding.
Ding ding.
Ding ding DING DING DING—
His screen exploded with notifications.
[New ssages: 6]
[New ssages: 12]
[New ssages: 23]
One after another, they kept coming.
His eyes had widened as he felt they were all from the sa chat—the weird guy he had ignored.
"Oh no," he had whispered.
With shaky fingers, he reopened the chat.
Raven had broken into a cold sweat. "Wait, he knows I saw it?!"
More ssages ca.
Raven’s eyes had darted around his room like a squirrel on caffeine.
He had opened his mouth, closed it, and finally tapped the reply bar.
Slowly.
Carefully.
The screen had remained silent for a mont as Raven kept repeating in his head. ’Please work. Please work. Please work.’
Then—
Ding!
Raven had flopped back on his pillow, exhaling like he’d defused a bomb with a toothpick.
’Damn, these gods really like having their egos tickled, don’t they?’
He was hoping it would work if he called the guy ’great god’, and it actually did, but then, another series of ssages ca.
Raven had stared at the last ssage for a long mont, regretting why he had opened the trade channel.
He wanted to go back in the past and change it, but he couldn’t.
"...What the hell did I just get myself into?"
All he could do was sigh in defeat.
.........................................
Present.
[TRADE CHANNEL: New ssage in three chats.]
Now, as Raven stared at the notification before him, he knew one of them was Grandpa.
He didn’t want to talk to that quirky celestial codger, but he didn’t have a choice. What if that guy got angry and sent him a cursed ssage?
Wouldn’t he turn to ash?
’Fuck...’
Resisting the urge to pull his hair, he opened the chat, and the first one, as expected, was Grandpa Hot Pot.
’Hah... what does he want now?’
Raven could only sigh.
At first, when he had heard the Old Man’s words, he had thought he might get sothing good out of him.
After all, anything gods have must be divine, and even divine shit was sothing humans would worship.
So, he had hoped if he licked the Old Man’s ass well enough, he might throw so leftovers at him but—
—Nothing.
He got nothing.
In the past two years of ass licking, all he got was the Old Man’s endless ranting and venting.
This Old Man was now like a bone stuck in his neck.
He couldn’t do anything about it.
Expecting a lot of bulishit again, Raven opened the chat, only to be stunned by the first ssage.
Raven’s expression broke as he saw those ssages.
"... is this real?"
He couldn’t believe it, but soon, he saw an arrow pointing downward in the chat, aning there were still so ssages left for him to view.
With a pounding heart, he scrolled down, and the mont he did, color left his face.
’No!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!’
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