For a long while, Raven just lay there—staring at the ceiling, one hand behind his head, the other lazily tracing circles on the pillow.
The muffled sound of Valeria’s embarrassed and rushed footsteps still echoed in his skull like a trauma loop.
He exhaled deeply. "...This day’s cursed."
"You’re not wrong," Omni said, his voice dripping with amusent. "But hey, bright side—now that you’ve been publicly humiliated, you can focus on sothing productive."
Raven side-eyed the tattoo on his hand. "Productive like what? Crying into my pillow?"
"No, boss. Scamming gods."
There was a pause. Then, Raven’s lips curled into the faintest, most dangerous smirk imaginable. "...You’re right."
Omni humd like an evil accountant. "Always am."
Raven sat up, rolling his shoulders. The late-afternoon sun coming in from the window cast half his face in shadow, the other half in faint yellow.
His mind was already whirring with ideas.
If the party tonight was going to be loud and exhausting, he might as well make so divine currency before that.
He cracked his knuckles. "Alright, which god are we robbing blind first?"
With that thought, he opened the list of nas in his personal chats, all filled with "heys" or greetings.
He hadn’t seen most of them but had already checked most of their profiles.
Omni was doing the sa, as he was reading the list from Raven’s mind, and that is when he saw a na.
He let out a snort. "Bumble_Fluff_69. His na sounds entertaining. I say we go with him."
Raven blinked. "...You’re joking."
"Not even a little. Dude’s divine domain is probably ’Heavenly Pastries and Guilty Pleasures.’ We might as well start with fluff."
Raven pinched the bridge of his nose. "I’ll do it, but why do I feel like I’m about to scam a celestial baker with a midlife crisis userna?"
"Well," Omni said cheerfully. "The universe might be writing a cody for us."
With a shake of his head, Raven opened the chat and sent a "hey."
He didn’t even have to wait long, as the Fluff guy started typing.
Bumble_Fluff_69: "Oh! O–Oh, my! I wasn’t expecting to be replied to so soon, honored sir! Uh, divine greetings, Sir Raven!"
"A pushover," Raven muttered as soon as he saw his ssage, then he nodded. "Well, it’s better, I guess."
"Of course, it’s better," Omni added. "Maybe the day wasn’t cursed after all."
For once, Raven agreed with Omni as he sent another ssage.
Raven: "Let’s skip the divine pleasantries. I’m here for business."
Bumble_Fluff_69: "O-Of course, of course! Whatever you need! It’s an honor! I, uh, heard you’re backed by Grandpa_Hot_Pot. Trendous deity. Wonderful chef. Sotis turns people into stew."
Raven’s eyebrow twitched. "That’s... an oddly specific complint."
Omni chuckled. "He’s not wrong, though. That goddess might simr a sky whale if it insulted her soup."
Raven decided not to comnt on that and continued the chat.
Raven: "Then I’ll assu you know what happens if you annoy ."
Bumble_Fluff_69: "Y-Yes! Perfectly clear! Respect, servitude, eternal pastry offerings, whatever you wish!"
Raven smirked. "Good. Let’s make it official. Send a System-verified Confidentiality Contract."
Bumble, a god with a cloud-like body colored in pink, as if he were a divie pastry, sat in his cloud domain and raised a brow at Raven’s ssage.
’Why a contract?’ He wondered, his cloudy body trembling with every movent he made.
As for why that question ca to his head, it was because the contract was a function that gods rarely used, as it was filled with loopholes.
No matter how many corrections you made, there would always be so left, and yet, Raven was asking him to sign a contract.
So, unbothered, he quickly typed a reply.
Bumble_Fluff_69: "Oh! A contract? At once!"
Without a second’s delay, he started typing a contract of confidentiality, not even bothering to refine it.
After all, he was sure Raven was making a formal demand.
To prove him right, Raven’s ssage ca.
Raven: "It’s a formality. I just like having a record of... cooperation."
"I knew it!" the god giggled to himself—that was until the rest of Raven’s ssage arrived.
Raven: "I’ll also be sending a copy to Grandpa_Hot_Pot for safekeeping."
That was when the cloud-like god stopped typing.
Although he had no expression, one could tell that he was visibly shaken, as his whole body was shivering.
On the other side, Raven waited patiently for the god’s reply, as he could tell that his ssage had accomplished his purpose.
Soon, the reply ca.
Bumble_Fluff_69: "O-oh... understood. No problem at all! Absolutely no problem! Ha...ha..."
Raven leaned back in his chair, grinning. "That should keep him sweating."
"Beautiful," Omni murmured. "You could sll the panic through the ether."
Yes, the reason for Raven’s ssage was to keep the god in fear, as every negotiation goes better if the other party knows that you have the upper hand.
Within the next ten minutes, the contract was signed, and Raven’s tone turned businesslike.
Raven: "Now, let’s get to the real topic. Whatever profit we make, I’ll take 60% of it. Agreed?"
Bumble hesitated, but the mont he recalled Raven’s earlier words about Grandpa_Hot_Pot having a copy of the contract, his mind straightened.
He realized that being greedy would get him nothing, as Raven had many other options, so even if he was getting the lesser profit, he should take it.
Not wanting to seem like he was hesitating, the cloud-cum-pastry-looking god quickly sent his reply.
Bumble_Fluff_69: "Yes, sir! Agreed!"
Nodding to himself, Raven decided to talk real business.
Raven: "Alright, now, I want the most demanding, high-value item you currently possess. The rarer and riskier, the better."
Bumble_Fluff_69: "Oh! I—I see! Let fetch the list. Please hold a divine mont!"
Raven rolled his eyes. "A ’divine mont.’ Sounds like an eternity."
A few seconds later, the system pinged.
[Attached File: "HOT_AUCTION_ITEMS_LIST_V7.hellx"]
Raven clicked it open.
The list scrolled for a while—artifacts, sealed relics, chaotic cores, and divine feathers—then, one particular entry caught his eye.
A leaked image file.
The description read:
[Confiscated Divine Image – "Goddess Luria (Unfiltered)."
Warning: Possession is punishable by execution. Do not list publicly.]
Raven’s face went blank. "Is this... what I think it is?"
He even sent the sa ssage, and Blumble started typing violently.
Bumble_Fluff_69: "Y-Yes, but wait! Hear out! It’s not what it looks like!"
"Buddy," Raven muttered, "that’s exactly what everyone says right before a scandal."
Omni burst into laughter. "Ohhh, this just keeps getting better."
Bumble_Fluff_69: "No, no. I’m not selling soone’s dignity! The goddess herself sells those pictures! She created a monopoly! Her ’exclusive blessings’ are paywalled! Anyone who fails to pay her daily divinity gets... executed!"
Raven blinked. "Wait. She kills people for missing a paynt?"
Bumble_Fluff_69: "Precisely! She’s the reason divine bankruptcy exists!"
Omni was wheezing. "So you’re telling she’s basically a celestial OnlyFans overlord?"
Raven muttered, "...That’s actually worse than I thought."
He rubbed his temples. "So what, you want to auction this and take the heat?"
Bumble_Fluff_69: "W-Well! With your backing, even she wouldn’t dare! Grandpa_Hot_Pot’s shadow alone could boil her temple. You’d be doing us all a service! A moral crusade! A holy leak!"
Omni lost it. "A holy leak?! HAHAHA!"
Raven sighed, torn between disgust and amusent. "...You’re all insane."
Still... the logic held.
Now that he knew he wasn’t selling so pure goddess’s picture, hence ruining her image, he started thinking of the profit he could make from this one image.
If he put this image up, every lust-blind god in the auction would go feral trying to buy it.
And with the scam Raven was planning, if manipulated carefully, he could raise the value of this item so high that it could contend with Arietta’s artifact.
After all, he was selling a photo that charged divinity daily and was in high demand.
The best thing about it was that they only needed to pay once to have complete ownership of the image, and even in the auction, a god could only get the buyer’s na.
No one could find out who bought the item.
Raven leaned back, cracking his neck. "Alright. Send it over. We’ll... teach this ’Goddess Luria’ a lesson in humility."
Bumble_Fluff_69: "Y-You’ll do it?! Oh, thank you, oh wise and terrifying overlord!"
Raven smirked, his fingers already gliding over the divine console. "Let’s get to work."
Still, he didn’t just put it up for sale just yet.
For a while, Bumble waited, and then he saw the image being put up on the auction.
But Raven hadn’t just put it up without any note, as there was a line written along with the item description that said, "Once you get this image, you will never have to pay daily charges."
He was sure everyone already knew that, but putting it up there increased its value.
Soon, since Raven hadn’t put up any initial amount, the first bid arrived.
[New Bid: 10,000 divinity.]
"Wtf?" Raven stared at the bid, almost wanting to jump the god who sent this, but he controlled himself as he knew that it was just the start.
After all, it would take so ti for the information about the item to spread.
Still, Raven needed to keep the auction going, so he started the plan, sending a ssage to Bumble.
Raven: "Alright, it’s ti to start the plan."
The cloud-like god, however, didn’t understand anything, so Raven added.
Raven: "Start raising the bids."
That was when the god realized what Raven was playing at.
It was a simple trick, and it was sothing anyone could do, but no one thought about it until now because no gods really cared much about cheating.
Raven’s lips, on the other hand, curved upward. "Alright, Omni. Ready to rig so heavenly greed?"
Omni chuckled darkly. "Boss... I’ve been born ready for this scam."
The next second, a new bid ca.
[New Bid: 100,000 divinity.]
Along with that, Bumble’s ssage also arrived.
Bumble_Fluff_69: "I did as you asked, sir."
Raven nodded, grinning widely, as he knew that the ripples of the stone he threw in the still lake were about to turn into a wave.
And the next second—
[New Bid: 120,000 Divine rit!]
[New Bid: 200,000 Divine rit!]
[New Bid: 220,000 Divine rit! ssage: "DELETE MY RIVALS FROM EXISTENCE AND GIVE IT TO !" – God_of_Ardor.]
Raven laughed softly, his voice low and wicked. "Hook, line, and divinity."
Omni added smugly, "You’re basically running a celestial stock market scam, boss."
"Correction," Raven said, eyes glowing faintly violet. "I am the stock market now."
With that, the bids climbed higher and higher, and although the rise stagnated at one point, Raven wasn’t worried.
All he had to do was send a ssage to Bumble, and the content of that ssage was, "Hit it."
With that, the cloud-like god would raise the bid, and the item, which was never supposed to be sold or even seen, kept rising higher.
As for how high it would go, Raven still had no idea.
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