In January, the sky over Kansas City is high and far, with an ice-blue expanse tinged with a faint smoky gray, emitting a sense of chill.
This winter is particularly cold, seemingly endless.
Reaching out with fingertips to touch the sunlight, a shallow heat dances at the fingertips, but no matter how far the stretch, it still can’t touch the clouds in front.
So, fingers are drawn back, leaving the index finger to delicately trace the shape of the clouds, using the sky as a canvas, the finger as a brush, sketching out a majestic picture in the mind, sensing the faint warmth of the golden sunlight falling when squinting eyes.
"Hey, Felix, Happy New Year."
"Another new year, ti flies so fast, it seems I haven’t had a chance to catch my breath, and it’s already the New Year."
"The weather is really nice today, good for running, training, and playing football."
"Rember what we said last ti? You wanted to try running with the ball; I thought today would be a good ti. It’s perfect for exercise."
"Oh, such a pity, looks like we’ll have to wait for another ti. Soone found a perfect excuse to slack off; honestly, you just say you want to run the ball, right? Ha."
"...Sorry, it took until today to co see you, it’s been a long, long ti, too long, right?"
"But I know you’ve always been waiting, always fighting alongside us, so you must understand. How’s our ga going?"
Quietly, quietly lying on the grass, hands under the head as a pillow, when the outside world falls into noise and chaos, Li Wei embarks alone on a journey to visit Felix, enjoying a mont of leisure and peace, as if ti here forgets to pass.
In a haze, it seems Felix never left, Annie playing hide-and-seek nearby, returning to the hospital, back to those afternoon chats, little troubles, little worries, complaining while laughing, with the sunshine so beautifully warm.
The whole cetery is so quiet, you can hear the birds chirping, hear the wind whistling, unaffected by the hustle and bustle of the outside world.
Felix sleeps peacefully here, so does Annie.
Li Wei always has the illusion that Felix and Annie never left.
He knows it’s an illusion, Felix and Annie have passed away, the funeral is over—though he missed it, now he lies beside the tombstone.
Consciousness clear, reason certain, everything is incredibly real, with no room for misunderstanding.
Yet he still has this illusion, ti seems forever frozen in an afternoon at the hospital, life stops pacing to listen to their pointless talk, gathering in a lively crowd wasting ti.
Unconsciously, the corners of his mouth lift into a smile, a trace of amusent glimrs in his eyes.
"Hey, didn’t miss the last ga, did I?"
"It’s the Los Angeles Chargers again, old acquaintance Rivers, never underestimate Rivers; indeed, we can’t relax at all, must go all out until the final mont."
"Close, a bit more and we would have brushed past a perfect season."
Words linger on the tongue, stirring a slight bitterness, diffusing.
Taking a deep breath, forcibly lifting the smile back at the corners of his mouth.
"I’m serious; I was thinking, if we lost this ga, I’d really have no face to et Felix, also Annie."
"I know, I know, you guys wouldn’t mind."
"Just a perfect season, a hollow na, with no actual significance, not affecting playoff seats; there’s no need to miss the waterlon over sesa seeds, focus on the playoffs and Super Bowl is the priority, don’t blur the focus."
"But..."
Words linger at the lips, even now, the secrets deep within remain as heavy as a thousand pounds, but eventually, they are spoken softly and quietly.
"But, it was our agreent, wasn’t it?"
"A perfect season. The three-peat. Fight to the end, never stop battling."
"I, I didn’t dare to co and see, sorry, before the perfect season was completed, I didn’t have the courage to co and see you, because I was afraid I might lose motivation, worried that my knees might buckle, unable to continue running forward, I was worried..."
"Sorry, Felix, I’m not the superhero you imagined."
Unconsciously, Li Wei closes his eyes and holds his breath, using all his strength to control himself.
All along, he refused to visit Felix because of the fear deep within, Annie’s departure accompany his runs and battles, now Felix is gone too; he’s unsure if he’s psychologically ready to face such cruel facts, all he can do is bury his head like an ostrich, throwing himself wholeheartedly into training and matches.
Fight, fight, fight to the end, until utterly exhausted.
Finally, achieving the first goal, Li Wei then gathers the courage to face Felix, before continuing to sprint towards the ultimate season goal; he needs so motivation and energy, he needs to know the most hardcore, loyal, and passionate fans of the Kansas City Chiefs are still by his side.
Yet, it’s harder than imagined.
Rember when Coach Burns extended the invitation, Li Wei thought maybe this was the reason for the system’s existence, maybe this was his chance to change his life.
This was everything.
But over the years, things are changing, the mindset seems to have changed too.
He hasn’t thought about the system for a very long ti; his life, dreams, world are blossoming in different colors through this team.
Life can actually have more.
"Felix, let tell you a secret."
"You know, people call an amateur not without reason."
"Actually, I don’t like football at all, don’t understand it, nor like it, purely because I’m good at it; more accurately, Coach Burns says I’m good at it."
"Then, it helps solve problems, that’s it. It has nothing to do with dreams, it’s neither romantic nor beautiful, everything is just a transaction."
"Ha, just like the professional league, everything is rely about interests, no less and no more, a string of cold numbers and calculations."
The smile on the corner of his mouth pulls gently, carrying a hint of self-mocking bitterness and banter.
Looking back over the past three or four years, it’s almost like a lifeti apart, the original intention has long been lost in the sedint and wash of ti.
Even Li Wei hasn’t noticed the slight burden silently falling from his shoulders, with a vague sense of relief easing the mood.
Over these years, people have been saying Li Wei’s arrival changed Kansas City, but in Li Wei’s view, this team, city also changed him.
"However, it’s you guys, it’s you guys who made feel the warmth and weight of football."
"Maybe, to , it’s just a sport, a job, but to you all, it’s life and hope, the only light that can dispel darkness amidst the long, muddy trench and endless ordeal."
"It is everything."
"It’s sports, the professional league, a complicated of numbers ford interests, a business of victory and championship; but at the sa ti, it’s dreams, hope, life, lighting up passion and energy beyond the routine of life and the trajectory of birth, old-age, illness, and death."
"Fight, just fight, yet it’s not just about fighting."
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