Defensive Magic Chapter 14: Pinch Me

FALL TERM - October 17th

The day started bad when I fell asleep in the middle of Kelyn Marblebrook's sigil lesson. It was a morning class and I was prone to drowsiness, but I hadn't expected to need Aisling prodding in the back to keep my eyes open. Generally, I liked Kelyn's class. She was an enthusiastic lecturer with a tendency to cast as she spoke, tossing lighted diagrams into the air above her head instead of using a chalkboard.

But this wasn't a natural sleep. Between slow blinks, I caught flashes of red eyes, long white hair - Ianthe. I'd never experienced her dreamwalk while I was still awake. I hadn't thought that possible. But there she was.

A flash of her, the sa familiar heaviness. This ti I couldn't quite tell where she was. She was in her bedchambers. She was in the room with . I was here in Kelyn's sigil class. I was there with her at the Stag's Court. The haziness of it all was giving a migraine.

I noticed Kelyn glance my way with an odd look, but she continued her lecture without a hitch. I didn't even want to know what Marblebrook had or hadn't told her about .

"Zephyr," Ianthe purred. Her voice was in my ear.

It was enough for to jolt awake. I wasn't dreaming anymore. Ianthe was gone. At least for the mont. I was fine until the end of class, until Aisling pulled aside and asked, "What was that, Zeph? That was weird wasn't it?"

"Just sleepy, I guess," I mumbled.

Aisling swatted with an open palm.

"Ouch! You're half as bad as Aries-"

"Don't lie," she said. "Friends don't do that. There was magic in your eyes. Now spill."

What? "You saw magic?" I asked.

"I can see magic. Big deal! Doesn't do much. Now tell , why were your eyes enchanted?" We were going to have to revisit that later when she was less pissed off. Aisling was five feet of fury and concern, staring down. I couldn't not tell her - even just lying was enough of betrayal to call into question our friendship. It wasn't worth it.

"Ianthe was dreamwalking," I said.

"Oh, the ex-girlfriend..." Aisling scrutinized. If she was watching for regret, she wouldn't find it. "I didn't realize she knew magic."

"Of course she doesn't -" I stopped before I could even finish the thought. "Oh... you're right, aren't you? She knows magic..." It hadn't even really occurred to . I had only ever known her to dreamwalk. I'd long accepted it was a quirk of her, owing it to her being old and a vampire, but well, Aisling was right. It probably did take a certain amount of magic to make that possible. I knew she'd never attended a school like the Midnight Court - she'd have made ntion of that at so point. But this little trick of hers had to co from sowhere. "She's not a mage," I said.

"It's not just mages that know magic." Aisling pointed to herself, letting her auburn curls spring forth into flowing ginger locks.

"Point taken... She's not fae though. She was human and then, post mortem, a vampire," I explained.

"So, she uses an artifact," Aisling said.

"She must," I realized. There were only three ways to gain magic. You were born with it, like Aisling. You were given it, like . Or you bought it, like most mages at the Court, like Aries, Noodle, Kelyn, Blackclaw. It was generally a safe assumption that if you were a mage, you had a magical artifact that allowed you access to magic.

"Sounds like she's not over you," Aisling said.

"You could say that. She also might murder if given the chance."

"Yikes..." Aisling grimaced. "Well I'll pinch you if I catch you dozing through lunch. Or better yet, I'll have Aries do it."

"Please don't," I sighed. Aisling only laughed.

I was in the clear for a few hours at least. Ianthe didn't make another appearance until combat lessons oddly enough - one of the few places I would have bet money on keeping awake. Especially since we were ant to begin mock duels. Blackclaw arranged the line ups so that I'd be dueling against Clarissa Spectre. She was a strong caster and competitive, so I was looking forward to it. Aries had volunteered to play second for my duel, because well, of course he did...

Aries had just finished the countdown for us to begin when I heard Ianthe's voice again.

"Oh, Zephyr..."

I hardly managed to pull up shield in ti to avoid an arc of flas Clarissa shot in my direction. I could feel my eyes getting heavy. It really wasn't the ti for it. I shot off a quick little zap towards Clarissa to give her sothing to be distracted by before Ianthe's dreamwalking sucked under.

Ianthe wasn't at the Stag's Court this ti. She crossed before a colonnade overlooking shadowed skies above a deep black lake. She was dressed in her sumr finery, a gauzy chiffon gown with a long, lightweight train of lace. Her hair was let down. Pouring down across her back, blending with the fabric of her dress. "You always loved it when I took you to the lake," she said. "You could co join still. Take a moonlit dip? Let all be forgiven?"

I snapped awake to see a mid-sized fireball strike right in the chest. Aries rushed forward, pulling off his jacket to try to smother out the flas. "What the hell, dude!? You just stood there."

I was only slightly singed. The fireball had done more than wake up. It had woken the wolf - now howling behind my eyes. I could feel it scrambling to rush forward just as it had the night of the full moon.

Aries was still patting the front of my shirt with his jacket. It was noticeably charred. Blackclaw hovered just behind him, but it was hard to focus on anything happening outside of myself. The wolf was wrenching itself out of from the inside. It was taking every ounce of self control not to show the sheer panic on my face.

Blackclaw cleared his throat. "Ashbourne, you have a potion to take, don't you?"

I rembered then that I did. I grabbed the flask in my jacket pocket and quickly swallowed half of it down. Spoiled at and soot. I choked it back. I needed this. Wolfsbane solution. And I breathed as the wolf retreated back into its slumber.

"Did that even work?" Aries asked. "That burn there didn't heal up at all." He pulled at the spot on my shirt where the fire had burned away the fabric.

Blackclaw passed a little potion bottle, one of the more familiar ones he'd kept in stock for first aid. This one did heal up the burns. Aries watched closely until I could shove him off and convince him now I was completely fine again. Though he'd still expected so kind of answer. "It had been a bad batch," I lied. "Drop it."

And he had to. Clarissa had co over to try to apologize. She was feeling sorry because it had probably looked pretty bad. I'd been falling asleep. I tried to brush it off. I'd been looking forward to dueling against her, told her that it wasn't her fault I whiffed on it. It'd been a good hit, I was distracted, and we'd need a rematch down the line. All true - no need to ntion the vampire ex-girlfriend trying to burrow her way back into my head... or the werewolf already lodged there.

Aries though wouldn't be brushed off quite so easily. "You fought Blackclaw better than that. What was it? Wouldn't hit a girl?"

"No, of course that's not it. Don't bla it on Clarissa. It was my fault."

"For what? You stood there doing nothing. You shut your eyes," he hissed.

"I'm allowed to screw up, alright?"

Aries huffed. We returned to our seats while Blackclaw went to prepare the next party in the dueling lineup. "You've been acting weird since the full moon. You rushed off and Marblebrook didn't even ask about where you were." I knew this is what he'd been stuck on. How he'd almost gotten a front row seat to watch shift into a werewolf last week. I really didn't want to talk about it. So, instead we were left with awkward silences, his mooney-eye stares, and a strange distance between us I didn't really know how to feel about. He'd been guessing that I was a werewolf for weeks now. He had to know, didn't he?

He didn't say it. And I didn't want him to.

So instead, that ant the two of us watched the rest of the duels in silence. When Aries inevitably got bored, he traced a finger over the frayed edges of the tear in my shirt, occasionally letting his fingers slip over the freshly healed skin of my shoulder beneath. I didn't really mind. I'd set my head against my crossed arms atop the desk, and sighed into the feeling of his touch.

I didn't even realize it when my eyes slipped shut again.

I was watching Ianthe from where my head was resting, on a sleek wood banquet table. Ianthe, in the chair next to , was sipping blood from a chalice. "I don't want to have to co looking for you, pet. And you should know, wherever fiefdom you're hiding in won't keep you once they hear you're wanted. You don't have to make this so hard."

Her hand slipped down the side of my face, gentle first. She lowered her head close. She could see , perhaps exactly as I was. "I know you won't tell where you are, but look at you, holes in your shirt, no jacket. Hell, you were my advisor. To think you'd stoop to this."

"Zeph?" Aries was shaking . In a flash, I saw Ianthe seated just beside him. She's not really there.

"You fell asleep. You were mumbling. I know that mark on your arm bothers you, but if it's keeping you up -"

"No, Aries. It's not that. You said I was talking? Did you hear what I'd said?"

Aries ramd his head into my shoulder. His hand was still there over the tear in my shirt. It was sowhat of a relief that Ianthe could see the shirt and not him, that he was there and she, despite all of this, was not.

"You were mumbling. Besides, whatever it was, it's not like you're going to talk about it..."

Fine, be that way. If I was mumbling, there was a chance whatever I said wasn't clear to Ianthe either. I was more awake than asleep. It had to be affecting what she could pull from sohow.

I tried not to think of it and refocused on the duels. Noodle was about to wipe the floor with Llewelyn. After he nearly bit Caelum during his first duel, he made so of the prissier mages nervous. Aries whooped and I clapped when a couple well placed electric shocks brought Llewelyn to his knees. Noodle gave us a low bow in appreciation. The suave gesture was only a little hampered by his tail wagging. And with that, class had ended.

I didn't even notice when Aries prised my flask from my blazer pocket before I slipped the jacket back on. I had just noticed it missing when I saw Aries, unwinding its cap.

He sniffed it, winced. "Gods, Zeph. What is this?"

"Aries, I need that," I attempted to reach for it, but he moved faster.

"Yeah, maybe once you tell what it is."

I grit my teeth. So this was how it was going to be?

He'd never been above tackling , so I wasn't afraid to wrestle it off of him. I reached again, but when he twisted the flask away from , I caught him by the shoulder and shoved forward. He was solid and though I was able to get him a little off balance, I was no closer to getting the flask. With his free hand Aries caught one of my wrists and pulled into a bind.

"I'm still going to make you talk to ."

He was better in a physical fight than I was, but I was a better caster. The second he released my arm, I cast shadow step and pulled him from Blackclaw's lecture hall and out into the courtyard. Aries stumbled a little bit, surprised by the sudden shift in scenery. When he glanced up at next, I had to wonder if that wasn't anger. I knew he still hated that spell, but I'd cast it anyway.

He backpedalled. I was waiting for him to hit with an electric shock, still his go-to spell, but instead, he raised my flask up to his lips.

"What if I drink it?" he asked. "No more whatever this shit is. What do you think of that?"

I straightened. He was already raising it to his lips. I could only think of the main ingredient, wolfsbane, and the little warning sign in the greenhouse.

"Aries, stop! It's poisonous." I'd read those signs. So had Aisling. The doses I was using were well above lethal. It was hurting the wolf and not , but Aries didn't have a raging wolf to smother down.

He rolled his eyes at . "You drank it. You really just don't want to share." He went for it again, and I lunged.

"You want to talk. We'll talk. Drop the flask. Drop it now."

Aries released his grip and let the flask fall to the gravel between us. The rest of the wolfsbane solution spilled out, gray and foul-slling. At least it couldn't hurt him now. I grabbed the flask and shook off the few drops of the spilled solution.

I felt my head spinning again as I turned to look at Aries. That familiar heaviness swarming in around . Ianthe was prodding at my mind again. Her pull was needle-sharp. It's really not the ti...

Aries looked more upset with than I felt he had any right to be. I'd seen this shutting Aisling out earlier, but where she'd had the wherewithal to fight on it, Aries wasn't fighting back. He'd already given up. I could see the ghost of past hurts all there, swirling through his expression. He pushed people. How many had hit their limit and finally iced him out? That wasn't what was happening now, but how was I supposed to even begin to explain this?

"Zephyr..." Ianthe's voice trilled in my ear. My head throbbed but I willed my eyes to stay open.

"Aries, I'm so sick of all the werewolf shit," I sighed.

Ianthe's laugh rang out. The pitch alone felt like a razor blade through my skull.

"Werewolves?" Ianthe said. "How far you've wandered, love..."

I know I winced, because Aries winced too. He couldn't hear her. He thought this was only about him.

"Did you think maybe I don't want to dig into all that? It's got nothing to do with you," I said. I was aware now Ianthe was listening. I could see her, swathed in lace, a little to the left of Aries. The one saving grace was that she could only hear my side of the conversation and nothing from Aries. "You know already. There's no reason to hash it out. I'm too tired," I said.

"So you really did turn on the full moon?" he asked.

"You were there. You saw it, Aries."

Ianthe cocked her head. My vision doubled, eyes burning. But I couldn't shut them just yet.

"And Marblebrook already knew?"

"Yeah," I said. When I'd gone to try to explain the next morning, she said that she'd already heard as much from Blackclaw. They'd had more than a hunch this was going to happen.

This wasn't enough. Ianthe's pull only sharpened. Aries was still unmoved. "Aisling told earlier that friends don't lie. I'm trying here, alright?"

Aries considered this a mont and then stepped closer. I was in too much pain to really grasp what he was looking for. A hug maybe? I don't hug.

Though it didn't really matter, because suddenly I dropped.

I was back at the Stag's Court again, on the divan in Ianthe's bedchamber. "Did you say Aries? Don't tell you've gotten in with one of Alden's brats. Aries of Fel, is it?" Ianthe asked. "You did, didn't you? It's your eyes, love. They give you away every ti."

I was too lucid for this. Not fully asleep, but I couldn't wake up. At least I was aware enough to shut up.

"Aries... is he the fat one?" I could feel myself already seething. She was baiting again. I was used to her attacking my mother. But Aries? She was trying to be cruel.

"Oh, pet, I shouldn't be surprised that you'd climb into bed with the first aristocrat who gave you a second look. You were never cut out for much else. But werewolves? Co on. They're so ssy. Just co ho. Or I'll co to Fel and collect you myself."

Then, I woke.

I was on the ground in the courtyard, Aries kneeling beside . His hand was on my back. "That wasn't a werewolf thing," he said. Where there'd been anger and loss before, now only concern. At least now, Ianthe was gone. She'd gotten the thing she really wanted out of . Information. She thinks I'm in Fel.

At least that ought to keep her busy for a little while. And this ti I rembered our exchange. I knew what she knew. It was more than I usually had to go on.

I was trying to catch my breath. Aries hovered over . His head blocked out the sun from my eyes. He had my head set against his chest, his arms supporting there. I blinked.

I was still seething a little over Ianthe calling Aries "fat." It wasn't so much what she'd said, but how she'd said it, like an insult. He lived in a place where eating was still sothing people did in public, and not scarfed down quickly and out of sight. There was nothing wrong with the way he looked.

He was a little soft and I'd gotten a little too comfortable. Maybe he wouldn't make get up if I didn't want to. Part of wondered if I stayed there, letting him hold , would it be enough to get him to forgive altogether and have things go back to the way they were?

No, probably not. Though that train of thought was in Aisling's voice. An odd choice for the voice of reason, but okay.

I moved to sit up. Aries helped . His hand stayed at my back even after.

"My ex-girlfriend dreamwalks," I said. This was the last thing I wanted to talk to him about, but here we were, talking about it anyway. "She's a vampire and she's umm... possessive. She's been trying to get into my head all day."

A laugh burst out from Aries, edged with relief. "I was worried you were sick or sothing."

I groaned. "I just endured my first full moon and my ex-girlfriend is haunting every other waking second and this is a joke to you?"

Aries socked playfully on the shoulder. "Was it really your first full moon?"

What? "Yeah. It sucked," I said.

"I've heard that the first one is always the worst by a lot. So people don't survive it."

"Well, lucky ."

Aries helped to my feet. The last traces of the headache from Ianthe had started to clear. There was a scuff on my pant leg from collapsing, but at this point between dueling and Aries, most of my clothes were a little less pristine than I otherwise would have liked.

"So when you took to the Sanctum, you really really hadn't assud...?" Aries asked. "I thought it was obvious. That's why I was so confused."

"No, Aries. I didn't know. I'm ignorant on all things werewolf. I've had the unfortunate luck of needing to learn as it's happening to , quite literally as it's happening."

That got him laughing again, even if it was at my expense. This was better than his sulking silences. "How'd you even beco a werewolf anyway. You just got to the Midnight Court, you had to have been bitten... when? A few weeks ago?"

"It's kind of a long story," I said. Aries cocked his head. He actually wanted to hear it. I probably shouldn't have been surprised, given I've been nothing but rude to him for weeks and he still keeps coming back to anyway. And I'd called him my friend. The word still feels off. But Aries and I have never had the kind of dialogue Aisling and I have had, where we both know where the other stands. The thing between and Aries is sothing else entirely - murky and tumultuous but also bleeding and alive. I didn't need to know exactly what it was.

We found a quiet alcove off the courtyard and I told him about my deal with Orendell, how this magic so days seed to be costing my sanity. About Ianthe who I'd been trapped with for years, who hunted the mont she noticed I'd gotten free. And he listened.