A deafening silence filled the room. It was my father who broke the silence. He was looking at
with surprised eyes. Jubell, did you just The astonishnt in his voice reminded
of the ridiculous act I had just committed. A shiver ran down my spine.
What have I done? I cant believe I just called him daddy!I was only two months away from coming of age. Unable to understand what Id done, I stood frozen in place. Father had approached
in no ti and was now standing in front of .
Holding
by my shoulders, he asked, Tell , do you rember what happened?
Impatience and despairthose were the emotions that characterized his expression.Why does he look so miserable?I didnt know why, but my heart was torn to pieces as well. Another sharp headache erged, followed by an image with a reddish hue.
Im sorry. I wanted
It was my fathers voice that brought
back to reality. Jubell, what was that just now? he sighed. My heart sank, thinking he was disappointed. Still, I couldnt undo what had already been done. Moreover, I didnt want to blow the chance I had to get close to my father.
The embarrassnt is temporary. Ill be honest this ti.With these thoughts, I opened my mouth. Oh, I just wanted to try calling you by a different na this ti. I had explained in a very subtle way, but my fathers eyes widened. I waited for his response in nervousness, afraid that he would scold
for acting inappropriately for my age.
I see, he replied. His eyes soon bent into semicircles as a warm smile settled on his handso face. His friendly expression and gentle gaze brought forth the feelings I had repressed since childhood.
To be honest, I had always wanted to call you by sothing other than father. I wanted to be like the other girls who had a close relationship with their dads.Still, I couldnt reveal my earnest thoughts as they might sound botherso.
He replied, You can keep calling
that if you want. My eyes widened in disbelief for a mont. Emotions surged from within, and I ended up crying. Jubelian? I tried to pretend to be calm to answer him. However, the dam that had been suppressing my emotions had shattered. I was swayed in whichever direction my sentints took ; it was as if I was drowning in the rapids of a river. Belatedly covering my mouth, I began to sob. It seed my father was confused as to why I had suddenly burst into tears. He repeatedly called after . Jubelian, whats wrong? Are you hurt anywhere? I knew that I had to stop crying, but his questions only made
more sorrowful.
The answer was right here all this ti Yet it has been so difficult for .
Do not co here again.I had been afraid that Father might reject
as he had in the past. For that reason, I couldnt dare to address him in a friendly manner until now. I had no choice but to watch him from afar and follow him around in a way that he wouldnt notice.
Tell
whats going on. I t his eyes in response to his question. Although he had spoken coldly, there was worry in his eyes.
Can I do that?
With a puzzled expression, he asked back, Do what?
Can I keep calling you daddy or dad from now on? I asked in between my sobs. He remained silent for a mont then nodded.
Of course. He then stroked my head once. It was an awkward and extrely careful gesture, but it was what I had desperately wanted as a child. I understood how I truly felt now. I always told myself that I didnt need his love anymore, but that had only been for self-defense. In reality, I still had a deep affection for him.
I continued to sob. Watching
do so without saying anything, he held my hand. Although there were no words of consolation or a hug, it was a turning point in our clumsy relationship.
Reviews
All reviews (0)