Lucien’s POV
The room fell into a silent beat. Ronan arched his brow at and didn’t say a word. He reached for the glass of scotch beside him. I beat him to it, of course.
I grabbed the glass and then walked across the room to grab a small chair from the bar. We were going to have a long conversation, and I didn’t plan on squatting the entire ti. Ronan’s gaze followed the entire ti.
He was always the hardest person to read. No matter how I tried, I could never figure out what was going on in his mind. I sat before him and downed the glass. The alcohol burned my throat. I placed the glass on the floor with a gentle clank.
"Sorry for your loss. Raphael didn’t deserve to die that way," I said. "It’s a sha, but on the bright side, you can permanently get rid of Natalia. Surprisingly, you stayed married this long." I shrugged. My mind drifted to Natasha, wondering what her fate might be after this.
Ronan was still wearing the shirt from earlier. His gaze was locked on like he was searching for sothing. Next, a deep chuckle filled the room. The low tone sounded a bit eerie. I stared at him, dumbfounded, wondering if he had truly lost his goddamn mind.
Ronan was still laughing, and my frown deepened. "Don’t tell you’ve lost your mind," I sneered. "I don’t want my children to go through the trauma of having an insane grandparent. Don’t expect us to visit you... Better yet, I’ll just say you are a distant uncle."
Ronan’s laugh stopped imdiately, and he shot a harsh glare. "You are an annoying prick. I don’t have the energy for you now," he groaned. "Even if you don’t like Raphael, give him so respect and allow to mourn."
My lips twitched as I looked at him. "For starters, you were the one who said I can co whenever. Do you think I like seeing your face?" I started counting on my fingers.
"Second, I can’t hate the dead. He didn’t kill my mother. And lastly, don’t bla for being annoying. Now we clearly know where the trait cos from." I listed, watching his stoic face go through several emotions.
"So how about we go through why I am here. I need the truth about my mother. Lynn is waiting for at ho," I stated. Staying here was a bit depressing. Ronan leaned against the wall and then released a heavy breath.
He was staring aimlessly at the ceiling, as if trying to go back to mory lane. "It’s been a long ti. I might not rember the detailed details because for the past 29 years I have been trying to forget her, but I can’t..." he muttered.
"We t years ago in a coastal town abroad. I was handling an overseas project, and I t your mother for the first ti, seriously injured, washed ashore unconscious..." There was a small smile on his face when he thought of her.
"It wasn’t love at first sight, but it felt perfect..." his voice trailed off. "After she was found, I took her to the nearest hospital, and days later, after being unconscious, she finally woke up. I went to the hospital imdiately after I got the call. I wasn’t a saint, but from the mont I saw her on that beach, sothing drew to her..."
A silent beat passed. The sa distant look filled his eyes. "When she woke up, she couldn’t rember a thing aside from her na, Nadia." The way he called her na carried a weight I couldn’t asure.
He laughed as if rembering sothing. "Now I think about it, she was running from sothing and, by chance, hid her identity. I don’t know for sure, but her amnesia act was flawless. After she died, I looked into Nadia. It turned out the reason she was on that beach was because of a failed assassination attempt. She probably wanted to hide her identity while recovering..."
My gaze darkened. Yelena never told that. The topic of Nadia was like a taboo before her, but knowing the Orlovs, I understood what Ronan was trying to say. Mum might have hidden her identity while she was recovering, or she had her reasons for wanting to stay with Ronan.
"Because she lost her mories, I let her stay with . She was completely clueless and couldn’t do a thing. It felt like I was staying with a child at a point, but it made my place warm knowing clumsy Nadia was there." He laughed. I wondered how she was back then.
"There was a ti she nearly caused a fire hazard because she wanted to make dinner after I ca back drunk from a business negotiation. Luckily, I wasn’t completely wasted, and the fire didn’t get out of hand. After that, I dared not get drunk again."
His expression changed for a second. I knew he couldn’t say everything, but from the way he spoke, I was certain he loved her.
"We didn’t fall in love after a magic mont. Before we knew it, we were so deeply in love, and there was no escape. She confessed first on the sa beach I found her. She was so nervous that night, and for a mont I didn’t believe my ears because I was long in love with her, with an obsessive desperation. I was scared to accept it. She was soone without a past, and my future was arranged from birth..."
A tear rolled down his cheek, and his fist clenched. "I was scared of how much I loved her, but the more I resisted, the deeper I fell. So when she confessed, it took everything in to reject her. Then she cried and ran off..."
"Her tears broke . Nadia got lost that night. I was so anxious searching for her. When I found her the next day, she cried and said she wanted to leave because she couldn’t help falling deeper. I broke down at that mont and decided to give in, even if it wasn’t forever. I kissed her, and that was the beginning of our love story... or rather, the peak of it..."
"It was the best days of my life, and I never wanted it to end. I wanted Nadia to be the one by my side, so I decided to go ho and tell my parents. What I didn’t expect was an arranged marriage. I tried fighting it, but it was clear the more I fought, the more dangerous it would be for Nadia..." he paused, then dragged himself to his feet.
He walked towards the glass windows. Outside was coated in white. "Breaking up with Nadia was the hardest decision I made. I tried to make her understand, and I thought she did. I knew Natalia before the arranged engagent and knew Nadia, who didn’t have any mory or backing, wouldn’t stand a chance. Nadia cried, but she accepted. I thought she understood..."
He sighed, pressing his head against the glass. "What I had no idea was that she was pregnant with you. If I did, I would have fought or even disappeared with Nadia, but I didn’t know. The worst day of my life was when she showed up on my wedding day with Gregor. Before then, I had heard rumours of my father’s pregnant mistress..."
"It was her, and she already had a little bump. I thought it was mine. Honestly, I confronted Nadia. Her eyes were filled with venom as she claid it wasn’t mine. The baby was conceived after we broke up..." Ronan pressed his eyes shut as a tear slid down.
"God, I hated her." His voice trembled.
My chest felt tight, and I drew in a breath. "Why did she hide it?" I asked. "Why didn’t you fight for her if you loved her that much? You could have run away."
I asked because, if I were in a similar situation, I would have fought to the end.
He turned around, still leaning on the glass, bloodshot eyes eting mine. "I thought I betrayed her. On the day I was told of the engagent, I thought I got drunk and, in that state, forced myself on Natalia..." he admitted. My heart clenched.
"I don’t even bloody rember the night details. I rembered being upset and taking a few drinks. Next, I woke up naked with Natalia. I couldn’t face your mother after defiling our love, so I let her go. What I never imagined was that Natalia had actually drugged with sleeping pills and, with the help of my mother, forced herself on ..."
My eyes went wide. I could never have imagined it going that way.
"For years, I blad myself until tonight. Natalia told the truth. I never betrayed Nadia, but I was played by the ones I trusted. And my gut tells Dad manipulated Nadia to lie that day she said you were his..."
He went silent for a mont before adding, "Because after that, Nadia always looked at like she wanted to tell sothing... but I was blinded by a love that had turned to thorns, and there was a distance that could never be bridged."
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