Father and Son (2)
I definitely heard it.
You too.
We stared at each other in silence for quite a while.
Father kept touching his glove over and over as he looked at , and I barely managed to open my mouth, trying to act as natural as possible.
"Yes. Did you too, father?"
Father did not answer but bit his lip, and I could tell that ant yes.
My mind was swirling with thoughts, but I knew this wasn't a problem that thinking alone could solve.
"Didn't you say sothing like that before?"
"What do you an...?"
"That, if you ever got the chance to co back to the past, you shouldn't do it."
"Ah..."
"Did sothing happen?"
I wasn't sure. As far as I could tell, I didn't lose anything.
I wanted to play baseball again, and I got the chance to do just that—in a young, healthy body, not an old, broken one.
Father slumped down onto the sofa and spoke only after a long while.
* * *
I never imagined a day would co when I'd tell this story.
I thought it was sothing I'd take to the grave.
Seo Tae-seung, who debuted in the KBO, dominated the league and had his sights set on the MLB.
He swept up championships and individual awards, and even in the Major Leagues, several teams were actively reaching out to him.
He also had a daughter he wouldn't trade for anything in the world.
It felt like the world was his, and every ti he took the mound, major League scouts would flock to see him.
Then, just before his MLB debut, on opening day of the season, Seo Tae-seung was struck in the head by a sharply hit ball.
As if that wasn't enough, he fell badly, fracturing his skull and suffering brain damage.
MLB was now out of the question, and it was impossible for him to continue playing at all.
He thought everything was over and even contemplated ending his own life countless tis, but because of his wife and daughter, he couldn't go through with it.
By so miracle, he recovered little by little, but the fact that he could never return to the mound tornted Seo Tae-seung.
It happened when he was about to throw away all his baseball gear, determined to start anew. He found the baseball glove he used back in middle school.
Without even realizing, he put the glove on and broke down crying, begging, please, just let play baseball again.
* * *
"So that's how I ca back to the past. As soon as I got back, I ran to your mother and clung to her, begging her to marry ."
My father's story was quite shocking. In his account, I found a clue.
"The thing you said about not doing it even if you could turn back ti..."
"... Did you get married? Did you have a child?"
Father said he had a daughter. And I'm an only son.
"I wasn't married, and I didn't have any kids."
"... I see. Good, then."
That was enough for to understand. No other words were needed.
That mory still seed to haunt my father.
After a pause, father asked.
"How did you live?"
I started telling my story.
Father nodded or replied with short reactions, and my story flowed from when I was nineteen all the way to the ti I put the glove on and bawled my eyes out.
"You had a tough life too, huh."
"Still, maybe not as much as you did, father."
"It's all in the past."
"I feel the sa way."
"But... were things really that bad between us?"
I scratched my nose as I answered.
"... Yes, I've been feeling sorry about it."
Should I start with sothing silly?
But Father shook his head.
"No, it's fine. As long as it doesn't happen again."
Then, looking at , he gave a faint smile.
"I'm sorry."
"No, I should be the one apologizing..."
It felt awkward, but not unpleasant. In fact, I felt relieved inside.
I had wanted to untangle the complicated knots, and luckily, we returned to before anything got too tangled.
There was a ti when I used to resent my father...
I spoke lightly, half-joking.
"So that's why you were so good at baseball..."
Father answered with a sheepish look.
"Well, it was my second ti... so there were hardly any mistakes."
No one else had probably ever seen Father look like this.
He had always been a confident man, and that attitude sotis made enemies during his playing days.
"But Mother doesn't know about this, does she?"
Father's expression turned serious. I had never seen him like that before.
"She doesn't. And she absolutely must never find out."
I dropped my teasing tone and nodded.
"Understood. Let's keep this between us."
"Thank you for understanding."
* * *
My once tangled and confused mind felt a bit more settled now.
That glove is just a slly antique at this point.
Father also said he was certain it would never work again. I didn't ask how he knew.
There's still a lot I haven't told Father... but maybe, soday, I'll be able to.
There's plenty of ti.
Anyway, my father's story was truly shocking.
"I can't even compare."
"Can't compare what?"
I still didn't feel entirely comfortable talking with Father.
"I used to think I was the most miserable person in the world."
But here was soone even more unhappy than .
I listened to my father's story for quite a long ti.
Father spoke in a sowhat dry voice.
"You can't compare unhappiness."
I felt a little more embarrassed.
Not just about unhappiness, but because I hadn't even tried to talk to him before I ca back to the past.
Just as I was about to fall into self-loathing, father spoke.
"So, what are you going to do now?"
What do you an?
I wanted to play baseball. Now that I got another chance, of course I was going to play.
"I'm going to play baseball."
"Is that so?"
Father's face grew serious. Then, looking a little troubled, he spoke.
"I'll help you."
"Thank you. But since you're busy, your support is enough."
Father is pretty busy. After retiring in the U. S., he started a business, and it did quite well...
"No."
Father shook his head firmly.
"For , this is a third chance. If I'm going to do it, I'm going to do it right."
"But..."
"I'll close my business, co back to Korea, and help you."
"Uh..."
"Hm? What's wrong?"
As I glanced away, father smiled as if he understood what I was thinking.
"What, will I beco a U. S. Senator or is my business going to be a huge success or sothing?"
Hmm, what should I say?
The business had been going well, but could I honestly tell him that it's almost on the verge of collapsing in the near future?
As I hesitated, father smiled warmly and said,
"It's fine, Ye-sung. I've earned enough to last a lifeti, and maybe the business was just an escape. Let be your dad for a while."
Even if the business did get tough, I knew he'd made enough to be okay.
Maybe it'd be better to leave a secret or two and just let things be.
"... Thank you, father."
"Haha, what are you thanking for? I'm more thankful."
Father smiled warmly, then looked at the clock and spoke with urgency.
"It's ti for your mom's TV show. Let's watch it together."
Then, with a face of realization, he added,
"Oh, Ye-sung, you've probably already seen it. How many years ago did you co back?"
I laughed.
"About seventeen years ago? I barely rember, so let's watch together."
"Do we have any beer in the fridge? How about a drink?"
"Sure. I think it's my first ti drinking with you."
"Wait."
"Yes?"
"Aren't you still in high school?"
"I am, but inside I'm..."
"Just bring one for ."
"Sorry?"
"What high schooler drinks in front of his father?"
... Is that how it works?
* * *
Mother is a lawyer.
She has both a U. S. and a Korean law license.
She was quite busy, appearing on TV from ti to ti during this period.
She once appeared on a news program as an expert consultant, and when she sternly said soone should be given the death penalty, she beca known as the "Strict Nuna" and was even cast in a mystery entertainnt show.
But, according to her, it was all the "devil's edit".
She claims that the part where she said, "Emotionally, I'd like to, but..." was edited out of the broadcast.
Either way, father and I watched the mystery show together.
"When you and your mom are together, don't strangers think you're siblings?"
"... Yes."
"Look at her beauty, wow."
"......"
"Forget celebrities, no one can compare to my wife."
"......"
... I convinced myself the reason Father was acting silly was because the wall between us was crumbling so fast, and he wanted to get closer to .
Father only made such comnts the whole ti, more like he was watching Mother than the actual show.
I wanted to ask him, if he loved her this much, why'd he live alone in the U. S., but I held my tongue.
There must have been a reason.
The show ended with other panelists flinching under Mother's sharp gaze as they tried to spot the "culprit".
"Wow, leaving it like that? Endings like a pro."
"But Father."
"What?"
"Does Mother know you're in Korea?"
"......"
Father's pupils shook.
"Hm. I left in a hurry."
"You could at least have left a ssage."
"I sent one, but it didn't go through. I only figured it out after I got here."
"She'll probably be ho soon. She texted earlier, asking to have dinner together."
Father's face now mirrored the flinching contestants from before.
"Maybe we should go out for dinner sowhere nice..."
And at that mont,
The intercom sounded, announcing a registered car's arrival.
"... Should we pretend it's a surprise or sothing? Don't we have any event props hidden around?"
Today, I was seeing sides of Father I'd never seen before. As he mumbled nonsense and looked around, he found sothing.
"What are you doing?"
"... Huh?"
He was tying the curtain strap around his own head.
To be exact, he was trying to make it into a ribbon.
"..."
"...."
What should I even say about this?
Never in two lifetis have I seen anything like this.
But I wasn't flustered.
Unexpected things could happen anyti, anywhere. I could handle this much.
"Should I tie it for you?"
"Make it look pretty."
"... Okay."
After returning to the past, the chaos that overwheld was followed by a different kind of chaos.
When Mother saw Father had returned to Korea without a word, wearing a ribbon made from a curtain strap on his head, she wasn't embarrassed or glad to see him after so long—she reacted a bit differently.
"What's this? Were you two together?"
My relationship with Father had been bad since I was a middle school student.
Not just bad, really bad.
"... You an Ye-sung tied that for you himself?"
To Mother, that seed more surprising than Father coming back.
She sniffled and shed a few tears.
Understandable, since even before we returned to the past, she'd been stressed about my relationship with Father.
"So I finally get to see you two make up before I die..."
"Wait, is it that big a deal? Honey, aren't you glad to see ?"
Maybe it was that big a deal.
Looking back, it's hard to believe things could improve this quickly.
"Are you two fully reconciled now?"
Father protested in a tiny voice that we'd never really fought, but Mother joyfully declared,
"Well, he even tied a ribbon on your head, so I'll take that as a yes. Let's go out for dinner! How long's it been since the three of us had a al without making faces at each other?"
Seeing Mother's face light up so genuinely made happy too.
"Honey, you changed cars?"
"I told you before. Don't you rember?"
Maybe I'm the one who's seen Seo Tae-seung's eyes shake the most.
... He showed a lot of silly sides today, but the Father I rember was always full of charisma, so it's all a bit surprising.
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