Sarah
Matthew stiffens beside . "She went to see a relative, didn’t she?" he says.
I nod. "Yes. When she cos back tomorrow, I want to talk to her."
"Please, don’t bla her for all this. She had no choice but to listen to your mother," Dad says.
"Everyone has a choice, Dad," I say grimly.
Matthew rubs his thumb across the back of my hand. He leans in closer, speaking low so only I can hear. "You don’t have to deal with this tonight if you are not ready."
But I do.
I want to know how Marishka feels about all of this. I want to know how she was able to pretend to be my nanny while being my true mother.
I shake my head at Matthew gently. "I have to," I whisper. "I need to hear it from her."
He nods, not pushing , just staying close, ready to catch if I fall apart again.
"Maybe I should go ho and speak to Evelyn..." he starts to say, but I cut him off.
I don’t say anything as I have nothing more to say to him.
~-~
The next day, I wait for Marishka for what feels like an eternity. But at least I am not alone. Matthew is here with .
I’m sitting on the couch, barely slept the night. How could I? Every ti I close my eyes, mories replay in my mind, but they’re different now, tainted by new understanding.
Every interaction with my mother...no, with Evelyn suddenly makes sense in a horrifying way. The coldness, the distance, the constant criticism.
It all makes sense now.
The doorbell rings, and I freeze. Matthew squeezes my hand before getting up to answer it. I hear murmured voices in the hallway, and then Marishka appears in the doorway.
But she’s not just Marishka anymore. She’s my mother.
"Oh, hello," she says.
"Sit down," I manage to say, gesturing to the armchair across from .
Matthew fidgets. "I’ll give you two so privacy."
"No," I say quickly. "Stay. Please."
Matthew gives a wry smile and puts his arm around .
Marishka looks at us with worry. "What’s going on, Sarah? When you asked to co ho earlier, I got really worried. Is everything okay?"
"Is it true?" I ask. "Are you my mother?"
Marishka blinks, startled, as if the words physically struck her.
She opens her mouth, then closes it again.
Her hands twist nervously in her lap.
Finally, she nods.
"Yes. I am."
The room seems to tilt slightly. Even though I already knew, hearing it from her feels different. It makes it real.
"Why didn’t you tell ?" My voice shakes despite how hard I’m trying to keep it steady.
Tears well up in her eyes. She leans forward slightly, her face raw with emotion.
"I wanted to, Sarah. Every day, I wanted to. But Evelyn, she wouldn’t let . She threatened to send away if I ever said a word."
I stare at her, trying to process everything.
"So you just...pretended?" I whisper.
"I stayed," she says softly. "I stayed as your nanny because it was the only way I could be near you. I thought...even if you didn’t know the truth, at least I could nurture and protect you."
I swallow the lump rising in my throat. "You took money from my parents," I say. "Am I really that sellable?"
Marishka flinches as if I slapped her.
"No," she says quickly, shaking her head. Tears slip down her cheeks, and she doesn’t even try to wipe them away. "It wasn’t like that, Sarah. I only took the money because I was desperate. Charles was generous enough to give it. My brother got into a bit of trouble in Ukraine, and I needed to send him the money. It saved his life."
I stare at her, a thousand emotions churn inside .
"You could’ve told ," I whisper. "About who you were. About everything after I grew up."
"I know," Marishka says brokenly. "And every day I didn’t... I hated myself a little more. But I couldn’t break the deal with your parents. I couldn’t risk being sent away from you," She trails off, shaking her head. "Will you ever forgive ?"
Of course, I will forgive her. She is the only mother who loved unconditionally. My true mother. "Yes," I breathe.
Marishka lets out a choked sob and covers her mouth with her trembling hand.
She gets up slowly, as if afraid I might change my mind, and kneels in front of .
"I love you so much, Sarah," she whispers. "I have loved you every single day of your life."
I reach out, hesitantly at first, but then with more certainty, and wrap my arms around her.
For the first ti in my life, I am hugging my mother.
Not a stranger in disguise. Not a lie.
My mother.
She clutches tightly, and I feel her tears soak into my sweater. I feel Matthew’s hand still resting on my back, steadying , grounding .
For a long ti, none of us says a word. Maybe we couldn’t erase the past. Maybe we couldn’t fix everything overnight.
But we could start here.
Together.
"Well, I should check on dinner, shall I?" Marishka says, wiping her tears.
I frown. "I don’t know if I like you acting like my employee anymore."
Marishka waves her hand dismissively. "Nonsense. You treat nothing like that. You’ve always treated like a family mber anyway."
"You know what I an. You are always taking care of the house, cooking, and..." I start to protest.
"Stop it, sweetheart. I don’t mind doing these things. If we were in my country and you were my child, I’d be doing this too. Oh, don’t tell you want your old mother to move out now?" she frowns.
I shake my head furiously. "God, no."
She smiles. "Good. Then let go prepare dinner and you spend ti with your husband," she says and kisses my cheek before getting up to leave.
I watch her disappear into the kitchen, my heart feeling lighter and heavier all at once.
Matthew shifts beside , his arm still around my shoulders. "Are you okay?" he asks.
I let out a shaky laugh. "Yeah. I am great."
"Co here," Matthew says, tugging gently into his side.
I rest my head against his chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart.
"You did so good," he whispers into my hair. "I’m proud of you."
A lump forms in my throat again, but this ti, it’s not from sadness. It’s from the overwhelming warmth swelling in my chest.
"How about we go sowhere nice? Just the two of us? The doctor said you need to rest at ho, but we can go sowhere where you can relax after you recover fully," he suggests.
"I would like that," I murmur.
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