I watched as Ren ate his dinner peacefully. His face seed tired and there were visible dark circles under his eyes. Whatever happened over the span of the past week took a toll on Ren’s body. I could tell that he was tired and probably hasn’t been eating or sleeping well.
I wondered if he would tell about his journey and the war if I asked. Many thoughts went through my head as I watched him slowly eat his food. I would be lying if I said that I wasn’t curious about what he had been up to. There was a war sowhere along the empire’s boarders and that was basically all that I knew.
As I was making my mind if I should ask him for more details, Ren suddenly spoke up.
“If you have sothing to say, you can just say it,” Ren said without looking up from his food.
“I...was wondering if you would tell more about...what you were up to...” I said hesitantly.
“You an about the war?” Ren asked, getting right to the point. So much for my effort to avoid that word.
“Yes...” I replied softly.
“Why are you so interested?” Ren asked.
He looked up at and placed down his chopsticks. I gulped. Ok...did I ruin his appetite just now?
“Umm...I guess I’m not particularly interested but...I just don’t like being clueless and not knowing anything...plus...I want to know more about you and how you spend your days...” I struggled a lot but sohow was able to strings so words together to represent my thoughts.
“Hmm...war and state affairs are not for won to ddle in...” Ren said, sternly.
“But...” I started to protest.
“But I guess I can tell you if it’s just about what I’ve been doing for the past week,” Ren said as he smiled a little at .
“Really?” I exclaid happily.
“I travelled with Shin and an army to the boarders where we’ve received reports that there were small battles going on. I guess, I just wanted to check it out. Shin was totally against going, but I ended up going anyways,” Ren started telling his story.
I listened with full focus as I kept my eyes glued to Ren’s face.
“Let’s just say that the battles were of a larger scale than we had initially thought, and things got a little complicated. I had thought that I would be gone for a few days, but the trip stretched to a week, unfortunately. Actually, so of my generals are still cleaning up the ss but the battle is as good as over,” Ren said, completing his very concise version of the story.
“Did you fight?” I asked the first thing that ca to my mind.
Ren’s eyes widened in surprise before narrowing at my straightforward question. I wanted to know what he ant by when ‘things got a little complicated’.
“Yes, I did,” Ren replied, looking straight in the eyes.
“I see,” I said, and I was the one who looked away first, breaking out eye contact.
I didn’t know what I was expecting. Ren went to war, so of course, he fought. I just had to ask and make him say it. I didn’t want him to fight because I didn’t want him to take people’s lives...and I didn’t want him to get hurt.
“The battle has been going on for longer than we knew, and the soldiers did not have enough support or reinforcents. Whoever was sending reports to the capital ssed up the details in the report real bad. By the ti Shin and I got there, morale was almost non-existent. Having with them on the battlefield was the fastest and surest way to boast morale,” Ren explained, his tone matter-of-factly.
“I see...” I mumbled.
“I’m not telling you this to make excuses for myself. I’m the crown prince, I don’t need excuses to fight for my holand. It is my job to fight. So, don’t misunderstand,” Ren said loud and clear.
His eyes that looked at burned with passion and pride. Any protest I had about his safety or any of my concerns, lted on my tongue and never materialized as words. There was nothing that I could say to a man who was willing to die fighting for his empire.
“Next ti you go off to battle, can you take with you?” I asked abruptly.
I wasn’t sure who was more shocked at my sudden and out-of-place question. Ren...or myself?
It took a while to process my own thoughts and feelings behind that question and it took Ren a while to believe what his own ear had just heard. We stared at each other our brains struggled to figure out how to react.
If Ren couldn’t avoid going out to wars, then...there’s got to be sothing that I can do to help him...right?
“...what are you saying?” Ren managed to say after a short pause.
He looked like like I was deranged and for a mont, I agreed with him. My question and its implications that I wanted to go to war along with him, was crazy...at best.
“Exactly like what you heard. Next ti you go to a battle, can you bring along with you?” I repeated my question again.
“Why?” Ren asked bluntly.
Good question...why did I want to go so badly?
“I want to help out. There’s got to be sothing that I can do...” I replied.
“Won don’t go to battles. It’s unheard of and uncalled for,” Ren stated as he frowned at .
He must think that I’m talking out of line again...
“Why not?” I asked.
“Do I really have to spell it out for you? Are you stupid?” Ren asked, raising his voice at .
“In my town, won are doctors, and we help tend to the injured all the ti...” I tried to argue back.
“Well, if you haven’t realized, this is not your town. There are no female doctors. Won are kept behind walls where it’s the safest while n go out there and fight wars,” Ren stated clearly. His brows furrowing together.
--To be continued...
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