Kianna’s POV:
The ride back was nothing but the low hum of the engine and the sound of my own sobs echoing inside the car.
Maddox kept one hand on the wheel, the other hovering like he wanted to reach for but didn’t dare. Streetlights strobed across his face, catching the shine in his own eyes.
"I’m sorry," he said, voice hoarse. "I never should’ve taken you there. I thought... I thought showing you would be better than letting you wonder. But I just broke you worse."
I pressed my forehead to the cold window, tears sliding sideways into my hair. "It’s not you," I whispered. "It’s , It’s my terrible fate. Every ti I let myself believe I can be happy... this happens. It gets ruined very fast...I ruined everything."
"That’s not true." His knuckles went white on the steering wheel. "I’m the one who started this chain reaction. I hurt you first and made you scared to trust. And now the one guy you finally let in... I helped rip him away from you." His voice cracked. "I hate myself for it, Kianna. I really do."
We cried together then, ugly and quiet crying, while the city blurred past.
We were two people who had once torn each other apart, now sitting in the wreckage, mourning the sa loss.
When he pulled up to the dorm, he killed the engine but didn’t move to leave. "You don’t have to go through this alone," he said softly.
"I know I’m the last person you want comfort from... but I’m here. If you ever need anything."
I nodded numbly, climbed out and sohow made it up the stairs.
The dorm was empty. Lesley had texted earlier saying she had a sleepover at Maya’s place to attend and will be back tomorrow morning.
Perfect, I didn’t want anyone to see like this.I locked the door, turned off every light, and headed straight to the bathroom to get a hot bath.
Steam rose in the darkness, the only glow coming from the faint strip under the door. I stripped myself naked and sank into the scalding water until it lapped at my collarbones.
Then finally I let the sobs co, raw, animal sounds that scraped my throat. mories of Mordred and I jumped in: how his hands road my skin, how softly he kissed , and how cute he smiled every ti he sighted .
I rembered his last words to be before this betrayal. " You’re only safe with ."
Safe? Is this what safe actually looked like? The sa hands that I couldn’t get enough of when he touched , was now holding silver cuffs for strangers.
The sa mouth that had kissed senselessly was laughing while won touched him everywhere I thought only I was allowed.
I slid lower, letting the water cross over my ears, muffling the world. I’ll never forgive him.
Never.
Never.....
My body began shivering under the water as I let out a hurtful scream. I felt like going insane.
And the mories kept coming anyway: his rooftop kisses, the way he cooked breakfast shirtless, the way he shielded from that bolt with his own body. Every beautiful mont is now poisoned.
My phone on the tub edge lit up again and again, Mordred’s na flashing like a strobe. I ignored it until the screen finally dimd.
The crying turned to hiccups, then to exhaustion. My head spun and the room tilted. The water felt heavier, deeper, like it was multiplying, rising past my chin and my mouth. I was too tired to lift my arms, too tired to care, I just let myself drown into it.
Black crept in at the edges of my vision.
Good, I thought dimly. Let it take , let it wash away all my sorrows.
For a few minutes, I couldn’t tell where I was anymore. Everywhere was dark.
Then the cold air hit my skin, I felt a strong arm lifting from the tub as the water kept sluicing off my body.
I heard a panicking voice shouting my na from afar, Hands pressing on my chest, breath forced into my lungs.
Soone was sobbing my na like a prayer. Perhaps this must be my funeral, I’m finally dead? I tried to open my eyes but couldn’t, all the voices, screams and panics made my head hurt even more and it all finally went dead silent a few seconds later.
I woke up wrapped in blankets, wearing soone’s oversized hoodie that slled faintly of paint and cedar.
The room spun and my head still hurts abit. A nurse, campus dic maybe, was checking my pulse, murmuring soft reassurances.
Lesley sat on my left, holding my hand so tightly her knuckles were white, tears streaking her mascara. "Oh my God, Kianna, you scared us."
And on my right is Lysander. I swear I’m not hallucinating.He was soaked to the bone, hair dripping onto the blanket with his eyes red-rimd and wild.
His white shirt clung to him like he’d been dragged through a lake. He looked like he’d aged ten years in a week, hollow-cheeked, trembling and all.
I tried to speak, but my throat was raw. "Wh—what happened?"
Lysander’s voice cracked. "You stopped breathing. I... I broke the door down and pulled you out." He swallowed hard, looking like he might be sick. "I thought I was too late kianna."
Lesley squeezed my hand harder. "He carried you out of the tub, did CPR until the dics ca. He saved your life, Kiki."
I stared at him, the boy who’d blad for everything on that rooftop, now kneeling at my bedside like a ghost who couldn’t decide whether to haunt or to heal.
My head throbbed and my chest ached. Everything hurts...And still the only thing I could whisper was a broken, confused question:
"Why are you here, Lysander?"
He didn’t answer. Just dropped his forehead to the blanket beside my hand and cried like the world had finally won.
What just happened to ? Is this a nightmare? Soone please wake up already because everything is falling apart, and I’m the only confused one ... .as if I just woke up in a life I don’t rember anymore.
Reviews
All reviews (0)