Helanie:
I couldn’t focus on Lucy anymore. My eyes were glued to Kaye and Kesha in the car together, and from the looks of it, they seed pretty dressed up. A weird kind of coldness crept over my body—a coldness no embrace could wash away now.
"I’m going back inside," I whispered, not even raising my head anymore.
"Are you okay? Did I upset you?" Lucy asked. I stopped dead in my tracks. When I turned around, I saw her eyes widen, doubling in size as if she already knew I was about to be blunt with her.
"Stop worrying about what others think of you, Lucy. You can’t live like that," I said, my tone harsh, my voice breaking under the sudden wave of pain and betrayal.
"It’s easy for you to say that. Your life is perfect, Helanie. You’ve got everything—looks, luck, and people who just like you. Look at you! You survived as a rogue, lived through the woods without a wolf, and then got admission into the academy with the most dramatic entry ever—punching the trainer. You instantly made friends. Nobody hates you. You’re so loved. There’s literally no trauma in your life except for that one ti when Lamar and Sydney attacked you. And even then, you got your revenge. It’s like you’re the Moon Goddess’s favorite. And the brothers’ favorite too," she added, the last part barely a whisper.
I just stared at her face, her words replaying in my mind like a reel of the torture I’d endured my entire life.
"You’re so pretty and clean. You’ll probably lose your virginity to your mate who will love you forever. I don’t think you understand how much I feel, Helanie. I’m impure. I cheated on my mate. My family has such high expectations of . My mother calls every day, asking what I’m doing, what I did the night before. Their affection suffocates . And the one person whose affection I want most is avoiding ," she continued, tears streaming down her face.
I didn’t know what to say, except that I would love to be in her shoes. I would love to have a family who cared enough to call every day—even just to bother . I would cherish it so much.
It was shocking how angry and upset we both were with our lives. But I never thought she envied .
"What makes you think I have the best life, Lucy?" I asked, desperate to know what she was seeing that I couldn’t.
"Lamar, Jenny, , Gavin, Professor Kaye, Professor Emt—literally everyone likes you," she said with a bittersweet smile as tears rolled down her cheeks. "In fact, when you were attacked by a Lycan, the boys acted like they were on a mission."
I had to cut her off at this point, or else I would start breaking down.
"Enough. That’s all you see in my life?" I asked, my voice trembling. "Lucy, the brothers don’t like . My parents kicked out of their lives. You’re lucky to have soone who cares about you. As for Gavin, you need to give him ti. I know you ssed up, but that doesn’t an you have to lower yourself so much that he walks all over you. You need to know when to stop chasing soone," I advised in a broken tone.
I’ve done that too. The mont Kaye started second-guessing our relationship, I stepped back. I wouldn’t beg him to stay. I wouldn’t tell him he had betrayed or hurt . If he couldn’t see it himself, he didn’t deserve to hear it from . It wouldn’t change anything.
"I just don’t know what to do," Lucy sobbed as she ran to hug , crying into my arms.
I patted her back while my thoughts drifted to Kaye and Kesha together. So that’s why he was pulling away from —he had found soone better. Soone who would help elevate his status. And of course, his mother liked her.
I wasn’t a fool; I could see what was happening. I had noticed the way Lady Darcy looked at Kesha. She adored her.
"Let’s head inside now," I said, breaking the hug and leading Lucy back into the dorm.
Jenny was already in bed, fast asleep, exhausted from the day. Lucy went straight to bed, and soon enough, I could hear her soft snores.
I, however, couldn’t sleep. It was in those weak monts that I felt the desperate need to do sothing to ease the overwhelming pressure. It had been a rough day, and I needed relief. I don’t share my pain with anyone, so sotis, I have to find my own way to cope.
Quietly, I got out of bed and crouched near Lamar’s bed, carefully pulling out his bag. I unzipped it with cautious, deliberate movents, trying not to make a sound.
Lamar was fast asleep; Penn had brought him back earlier. Gavin still wasn’t ho, but I’d sent him a text, and he’d replied saying he was at a nearby bar, so I knew he was fine.
I knew nothing about drugs, but I grabbed a small plastic bag of powder I found inside Lamar’s bag and tucked it into my sweater. Then, I slid the bag back where it was and sneaked out of the room.
The rooftop was my destination—a quiet place where no one would find .
When I reached it, I was struck by how peaceful yet eerie the night felt. The view from up there was beautiful, but the cold air only emphasized the storm inside . My body, under so much pressure, felt warm despite the chill.
I sat down on a chair, placing the plastic bag in my lap. I stared at it, debating whether to open it, when I suddenly heard footsteps behind .
"Drugs and Helanie should never be in the sa sentence—or in Helanie’s lap," a voice said, stern and disapproving.
My heart sank at the sound. I turned around and saw him standing there, shaking his head at in disappointnt.
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