༺ Starting Over (1) ༻
I know we were on the second floor, but would falling headfirst knock unconscious? It would be nice to sleep for just a month and then wake up.
I rember having a similar thought before the vacation, but it resurfaced as the vacation neared its end. Perhaps it was because I felt so desperate to escape this situation that I’d even welco fainting.
“Mar, you can let go now…”
“No.”
“So you won’t.”
Marghetta’s firm refusal, far beyond a simple ‘no’ or ‘wait a bit longer’, made wrap my arms back around her shoulders.
Seeing her snuggle deeper into my embrace stirred a strange new emotion within , one different from before. I felt both grateful to her for forgiving my pathetic self and joyful that she promised to wait.
But hugging the victim and crying while apologizing for my actions was embarrassingly inappropriate. What a shaful act, especially towards soone younger than . And when I looked down, the sight of Marghetta’s shoulder marked with shaful traces was visible.
‘I’m going crazy.’
Her wet shoulder seed to mock , saying, ‘Hey, what are you doing?’ It’s humiliating. Facing this vivid reminder of my embarrassing self was mortifying, but Marghetta wouldn’t let go.
Then what could I do? I couldn’t dare push Marghetta away, so I’d just have to live with a little embarrassnt.
Well, honestly, it was more than just a little embarrassing.
“Carl.”
“Yes, Mar.”
“I just wanted to call you.”
I hear Marghetta giggle from within my arms.
“Could you call Carl?”
I squeezed my eyes shut, imdiately regretting my earlier words. Why did I say that during that ti?
I cursed my past self. Feeling overwheld by intense emotions, I went and did sothing unthinkable under normal circumstances. If I were in my right mind, I wouldn’t have done such a thing.
Still, maybe it was okay if Marghetta was happy. Yeah, that made it alright.
“Carl.”
Feeling her rub her face against my chest, I felt even more sorry. How much had I pushed her away for her to behave like this?
“Yes, Mar. I’m here.”
I tightened my arms around Marghetta. It seems like we would be in this hug for a while.
I never expected it to last an hour, though.
***
Just a bit more, just a little longer.
I couldn’t control my urge to stay close to Carl’s arms. I had planned to stay only for a short while, but my body wouldn’t move when I tried to pull away.
Luckily, Carl didn’t push away, which gave the courage to pull back. It’s already been so long when I planned to stay just a bit.
“…Thank you, Carl.”
“I should be the one thanking you.”
I could stay longer in Carl’s arms, but let’s stop now. I’ve already been in his arms for too long. Holding on any longer would trouble him. Yes, it’s ti to let go.
Reluctantly easing away, I finally saw Carl’s face. I hadn’t seen it while embracing him.
His expression, softer than when he first arrived, was mixed with a hint of embarrassnt. It contrasted with his earlier grave appearance.
When Carl’s gaze shifted to my left shoulder, I smiled lightly and touched it.
“It’s dry now. Don’t worry.”
“…I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay.”
I refrained from adding that I actually enjoyed it because I knew it would only embarrass him more.
But it truly was a precious mont. Carl opened up to to the point of tears, showing that he trusts .
‘I’ll keep this.’
From today, this dress is my treasure.
“Did I hold on to you for too long? I’m sorry, Carl. You must have a lot to do.”
As soon as Carl leaves, I’ll change to new clothes and treasure this one.
I’ll save it for another special day, one that rivaled today’s significance.
“I’m sorry for suddenly saying sothing strange—”
“Don’t be sorry. It’s not your fault.”
He had been carrying this burden alone, never sharing it with anyone. How could finally sharing it with soone else be wrong?
It wasn’t wrong, but rather sothing comndable. Sharing one’s burdens allowed healing, even if it was slow.
Carl’s experiences were tragic and sad. If I show sadness too, it might burden him.
So, I smiled brightly and spoke, hoping to bring him so comfort.
“Co back whenever you want to talk, Carl.”
I’ll always be here waiting for you.
***
Today’s events weren’t just about but also involved the hopes of many others.
— How did it go?
“I told her.”
— There’s no need for to report to His Highness then. You’ve avoided becoming a lifeti minister.
The Minister called as soon as the sun set. Many hopes were really invested in this.
Yes, the minister deserved to know how things unfolded. If it wasn’t for him, then I’d still be keeping everything inside.
— You’re just as annoying now as you were four years ago. If it’s going to be like this, then why don’t you go back to being a Team Manager?
I briefly imagined what it would be like to have those Managers as my superiors.
‘Damn it.’
Just the thought was dizzying. The 5th Manager was okay, but having the 1st, 2nd, and 3rd Managers as my bosses? That would be a nightmare.
But I didn’t respond with the usual harsh words or profanity. I understood why the Minister said that. He must have felt pity and frustration after seeing struggle with problems I couldn’t solve alone.
This ti, I owed a big debt to the Minister. I don’t want to admit it, but it was a huge debt.
“I’ll try to make sure this doesn’t happen again.”
— Of course, you should.
The Minister’s response, as if it was the most obvious thing, made laugh unintentionally.
— You’re laughing?
“I apologize.”
Of course, my laughter didn’t last long.
I quickly bowed my head, and the Minister just clicked his tongue and moved on.
— The Invincible Duke was also very worried. He’ll be relieved to hear things have been resolved.
“I’m really sorry.”
— I can’t imagine what would have happened if the Iron-blooded Duke had known about this.
His words sent a chill down my spine. If soone like the Iron-blooded Duke had found out about this incident, it wouldn’t have ended quietly.
Thankfully, it seed that the Invincible Duke hadn’t inford the Iron-blooded Duke.
But if he had, the Iron-blooded Duke would have been furious at the scoundrel who trifled with his beloved youngest daughter.,
He would have stord to the Capital ard, with his knights in tow. Even the Crown Prince, who would be curious about the commotion, would have opened the gates to watch.
‘I would have been broken in so way.’
They wouldn’t have killed , but I would have ended up with broken limbs. Or worse, maybe even dead.
“I’m truly relieved he doesn’t know.”
— Thank the young lady, too. If she had cried and contacted the Iron-blooded Duke, nothing you said would have mattered.
“Yes…”
There was no denying it. I was literally risking my life by tornting Marghetta.
A mix of gratitude and guilt, sothing I felt for the umpteenth ti today, swirled in my heart.
“I’ll wait until Sir Carl feels comfortable. I’ll wait until then.”
Seeing how my gratitude outweighed everything else, it seed like I was really a selfish person.
Of course, I couldn’t make Marghetta, who had already waited for over a year, wait any longer. I needed to sort out my feelings as quickly as possible.
***
Since that day, only one thing had changed.
Marghetta’s way of addressing was the only thing that shifted.
But that one change had significant repercussions. Even the least observant person would guess sothing was up.
And everyone in the mansion was perceptive. This applied even to the foolish club mbers, except when it was related to their own love lives.
“Why don’t you show the young lady your office?”
Even the butler suggested showing Marghetta the mansion’s office, a place central to the household. This indicated that they considered her a key part of the mansion.
“It’s too soon for that.”
“Understood.”
They were already treating Marghetta like the lady of the house. It was too soon for that. We weren’t even engaged, let alone married. I’ve only just started being honest with my feelings. I need so ti to breathe.
I managed to calm down the butler, who was ready to rush things. However, every servant I t greeted with knowing looks.
And I also heard that Yuris and Sophia, the youngest maids, were especially attached to Marghetta. Were they taking sides? It was almost maddening.
“Oppa.”
eting Louise in such a situation was actually a relief. At least she wouldn’t complicate things further.
“I’m glad things seem to be going well for you.”
“Ah, yes.”
I nodded absentmindedly at Louise’s smiling face. Yes, things had worked out.
“It was all thanks to you. I appreciate it.”
I was referring to the conversation I had with Louise before I went to Marghetta. Although I didn’t ntion Marghetta back then, Louise was sharp.
My talk about feeling sorry and wanting to open up, and then Marghetta started to call by my na. You don’t need to be exceptionally perceptive to notice the connection.
“You’re the one who did everything, oppa. You’re amazing.”
“It’s embarrassing to be called that.”
“Ahaha, is that so?”
Seeing Louise laugh made a smile appear on my face.
The Minister, the Invincible Duke, and Louise. Without even one of them, I would still be keeping my mouth shut, holding on to the strange idea of ‘bearing everything alone to avoid burdening others.’
‘What a fool I was.’
It was clear to now. Keeping silent back then was foolish.
The gratitude I felt for Louise grew in proportion to the length of that dark history. It was all thanks to her that my ongoing dark history could be turned into the past.
“I’m really grateful.”
I patted Louise’s shoulder while expressing my heartfelt thanks.
“What I did is nothing compared to what oppa did for .”
What a kind heart she had.
If only the club mbers were half as good as their leader.
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